The Beverly Hillbillies
CBS (ended 1971)
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Season 9
3/23/71Jethro finally returns from hiding out, as Granny is planning Elly's marriage to Robert Crockett. Everything seems to be going smoothly, until Elly and Robert are driving to Vegas, and Elly learns that he thinks she loves him. In the end, the truth is revealed to everyone, and they learn who this mysterious Robert really is.
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3/16/71When Dick Bremerkamp learns more of Elly May's family and all their millions, he decides to pay them a visit as Robert A. Crockett. The Clampetts fall in love with this man as a potential husband for Elly May, just as Miss Jane is falling for him (Robert Audubon) as a potential suitor for herself, and Drysdale is falling for him (Robert Audubon Getty) as a depositor for the bank.moreless
3/9/71Elly is starting her new job as a secretary, though not finding success in it. After Jane gets out some of her old typing books for Elly, Dick Bremerkamp, a tenant in her building and unemployed actor, sees the two girls and starts asking Phinney about the gorgeous blonde. After Phinney tells him all about them, he gets in good with Miss Jane, by posing as an Audubon, and Drysdale, by posing as a Getty. Robert, as he is now known, starts getting in good with the lovely Elly May, as he had hoped.
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3/2/71The Clampetts are visited by Louellen Aden, an old sweetheart of Jethro's. After trying to figure out what could be bringing her out to Beverly Hills, the Clampetts believe it is because Jethro proposed to her back in the hills. Afraid to get married, Jethro goes into hiding. Louellen finally arrives, now a very attractive young lady, and reveals she is visiting Los Angeles to break into the movies. Meanwhile, Elly May is learning to be a secretary, but she is having trouble getting her start.
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2/23/71Elly gets a job as a secretary at Mr. Drysdale's bank to ensure proper treatment of the girls working there. But Granny makes her look like a flapper and teaches her wiggle walking, eye rolling, and lap setting. Drysdale throws her out, but after he realizes it is his largest depositor's daughter, brings her back. After Elly gets Drysdale to give Jane a raise, Drysdale gets revenge on his secretary by having her landlord, Phinney, trash her apartment and up her rent by doubling and tripling it. Elly moves in with Jane to appear more as a secretary and a working girl. When Phinney catches the Clampetts and Miss Jane in there, he has them arrested. As soon as Drysdale finds out who has been thrown in jail, he gets them out and makes Phinney the building's janitor.moreless
2/16/71Troubles are following everyone after the women's lib movement ended. Elly and Granny return home to the mansion, while Jethro still believes he is Japanese and the woman should serve him because women should wait on man. And at the bank, the secretaries are working on better working conditions, but get bullied by Banzai, who is trying to get new girls from Japan. Miko returns to the Clampett mansion, and Jethro believes he loves her, while the lovely geisha is just only trying to get help. When Granny visits the bank, she gets Banzai to cooperate and fix Helen's car and give back the secretary's contract, and Drysdale decides not to fly the new girls for Banzai out. Jethro decides to stay at Miss Jane's place at her suggestion, and Banzai joins him. And Elly learns what it is like to be a geisha, of course Granny is not pleased, and Miko blames herself. But in return, Granny and Elly decide to teach Miko their ways of life. Banzai returns to the mansion, and sees Elly May, but after he learns that's Jed's daughter, takes Miko back, who has turned into a hillbilly.moreless
2/9/71The members of Women's Lib decide to teach Jed, Jethro, and Drysdale a lesson after learning the glorious life they are leading at the Clampett mansion.
2/2/71As Jed and Jethro are waiting for Banzai's Japanese girls to come, Elly and Granny are staying with Miss Jane and the women's lib movement, where they are learning about life in an apartment. At the mansion, the guests arrive, and Jethro, trying to prove he is now Japanese, pronounces his L's as R's, and requests a karate chop, judo roll, and sumo crush, thinking they are dishes, not moves to beat people up. Jed and Jethro are getting a taste of the Japanese lifestyle, though Jethro's is more painful, while the women's lib movement is finding it hard to hide from Miss Jane's landlord, Phinney, especially with Elly's pets running around. Granny and Elly decide to provide a hot meal for the girls, and stop by the mansion to get some of their delicacies, where they see the men suffering. While Granny is cooking, Phinney visits. The girls try to throw Phinney off by telling him he looks like Cary Grant, but he doesn't agree. Gregory Peck, yes, but not Grant. Granny decides to call the mansion to ask if Jed is suffering, but Jed tells her he should go on suffering a few more days, while he is actually living the good life.moreless
1/26/71Granny and Elly have decided to support the women's lib movement, since Jethro treats them like servants. Each time Jed tries to make it better, Jethro ends up messing it up and upsetting the women even more. At the bank, the secretaries continue to fight for liberation, but Drysdale has decided to challenge them as well. After one secretary, Susie, scared away two guards, Drysdale hires Banzai, a karate expert, to scare the women away, as well as breaking Helen's car. When Jed tells him that Elly and Granny are protesting, Drysdale and Banzai head to the mansion to put the women in their place. Banzai busts up one of their iron benches, upsetting Granny. She beats him up, greatly shaming the karate expert. The women decide to then leave and join the women's lib movement. Drysdale asks Jed if Banzai, who is upset about what Granny did, can stay at the mansion, and Jed says it is okay. Jethro hears this and congratulates Jed for doing something right, not knowing it was he who drove Elly and Granny away.moreless
1/19/71The secretaries are fighting for liberation, but Drysdale refuses to listen. The Clampetts see the girls protesting, and the girls think they are a goon squad strike breakers. After Granny and Elly hear the story, they take the side of GRUN. The secretaries decide to go to the Clampetts, but Drysdale tricks them and locks them in his office. Drysdale goes to the Clampetts and tells them the girls have brainwashed Miss Jane. Elly and Granny see the girls' van and think he is mistreating the girls at the bank. When Elly tells him he should treat the girls well, he disagrees, and Granny flips him. At the bank, the girls try to get out, and make a rope out of clothing to escape from the locked office. Helen and Jane escape and head to the Clampett mansion. Granny gets to the bank and sees the girls locked and undressed in Drysdale's office. When Helen and Jane get to the mansion, Drysdale tries to prevent the girls from speaking. Granny comes and tells Jed she'll tell Jed the story with a surprise ending. The girls head back to the bank, and force Drysdale to walk inside in his underwear, as the secretaries were in his office.moreless
1/12/71After the Clampetts finish dining with the Grunion they captured, actually just a surfer boy and girl, they let them go and return home since they don't put up a fight. Meanwhile, Drysdale wants to get his former secretary back and sends Helen to get Jane to return. Helen, while doing so, learns that the Clampetts still believe the Grunion are people, and when Drysdale learns this, he decides to visit the Clampetts and tell them they met the deserters, but he met the fighters. The Clampetts decide to go back to fight the tough Grunions, while the secretaries at the bank form a women's lib group, naming themselves GRUN, Girls Resist Unfair Neglect. They hold their protest at the beach, and Elly sees Jane marching with the girls from GRUN, thinking she captured them, and Jethro comes carrying Ulla, a secretary, who tells the Clampetts that GRUN only has women, causing Jethro to swim to the island of Grun. Helen comes to the Clampetts to tell Ulla that Drysdale is weakening, and Jane gets the girls, saying Drysdale's surrendering, but the Clampetts don't believe it. When they see the fireworks display, they believe that the U.S. is winning at Grun.moreless
1/5/71The Clampetts prepare to go fight the invading Grunion, while Drysdale works to keep the Clampetts believing Mark has turned coward. The Clampetts head to the beach and set up their headquarters. They look out on the water and see a couple of surfers and mistake them for the Grunion. Elly captures a surfer boy and makes him say he is a Grunion. She brings him to the camp, and Granny tells Jethro to get a Grunion so he can eat. Jethro heads out and gets a girl on the beach who says she is a Grunion because she, like Jethro, is starving. He brings her back to the family's fort. When the boy and girl meet each other, they joke about being a boy Grunion and a girl Grunion, and Granny thinks that the people of the island of Grun can't tell each other apart.moreless
12/15/70Granny finally realizes that Mark is not half man/half frog. After learning he is all human, Granny is set on finally getting Elly May married to Mark. Elly and Mark are getting more serious, and Mark is planning to leave the Navy to spend more time with Elly and on his oceanography research. When Drysdale learns all of this, he is dead set on splitting Mark and Elly up. After reading about the grunion invasion, Drysdale tells the Clampetts that the Grunion, "a fierce war-like people from the island of Grun," are invading, and the Navy is needed, including Mark, who is leaving at this moment. The Clampetts believe Mark is a coward for deserting the Navy at wartime, and decide to themselves fight the invading Grunions.moreless
12/8/70Granny still believes Mark can turn people into water critters and turned Shorty into a seal. She gets the frogman to "turn" him back and continues to try to break up Elly May and Mark up, by having Elly cook for Mark. Meanwhile, Drysdale tries to keep Jed from withdrawing his money from the bank for oceanography research, this time dressing up as Napoleon.moreless
12/1/70Granny has come up with a new way to split Elly and Mark up and has called Shorty Kellems to help her do so. When Shorty arrives, she tells Mark that Shorty used to be Elly's fianc and wants revenge on Mark, but her story fails. At this time, Drysdale is trying to tell Jed that oceanography is a bad idea, but doesn't succeed and ends up saying Miss Jane said it. After this, he comes up with a new plan. Back at the mansion, Granny is still trying to make Mark believe Elly and Shorty love each other, and gets the two to kiss. Mark sees this, as Granny planned, and tells Shorty that Jed traded Elly to Shorty for a mule. Mark questions Jed about this, and Jed and Elly learn Granny made up this story. Granny walks away, and Drysdale visits the mansion with Miss Jane in a straight jacket, telling Jed he taking out his money did this. Jed tears up his check. Meanwhile, Shorty wants to see Mark as half-man/half frog. But at the pool, he sees the seal Elly and Jed are trying to hide, before visiting Mark. Granny heads down to visit Shorty, and Jed and Elly unsuccessfully try to stop her. She sees the seal, and thinks it is Shorty.moreless
11/24/70Mark shows the family a movie of the ocean's depths, but it still does not impress Granny. Meanwhile, Drysdale is trying to impress Mark. He redecorates his office with Navy memorabilia. Everything goes well, until Mark mentions oceanography and Drysdale donating money like Jed plans to. He throws Mark out, and calls Granny and tells her Mark and Elly can't get serious. She agrees. Meanwhile, the family plans another scuba lesson as Drysdale and Granny plan to "cure" Mark. Granny, thinking her family became frogs again, tells Drysdale how Dr. Klinger cured them before and takes five frogs she found in the pool (Jed, Elly, Jethro, Mark, and some neighborhood kid) to Klinger's office, along with Jane. Granny leaves, and Jane tells Klinger the story behind it. Klinger has a way to cure Granny by showing her there is nothing to scuba diving. Miss Jane meets his wife, and they leave and Klinger meets the Clampetts. Granny sees the family return and thinks the doctor made another miracle. She is told that he is going to go in the water, and runs to the pond and sees a frog, thinking its Klinger. So she tells his wife, who is his secretary, to kiss him. Granny leaves, Klinger re-enters, and Granny sees the two kissing, thinking the kiss worked.moreless
11/17/70Granny thinks Jethro has turned into a frog after he went swimming and takes him to Dr. Klinger in the bank building. Jethro stops by the bank and takes the frog home. Granny sees him at home and thinks he is cured. Jed decides to learn to be a frogman too, but when he tells Jethro, Granny jumps on him to stop him. Jethro takes Granny to her room, and Granny begs someone to end her suffering. Jed tells her to relax and take a few tranquilizers. Jed practices to be a frogman, and when he ends his practicing, Granny sees a frog in the water, thinking it is Jed. She takes him to Klinger's office. She tells the doctor all about Jed, and her rheumatism medicine. She comes home and sees Jed in the house and thinks Klinger has done it again. She is about to drink her moonshine to celebrate, but Jed stops her, thinking she has had enough already. She tries to sneak it, but Jed stops her with that too.moreless
11/10/70After Granny returns home, she is told that Mark is going to teach Elly to be a frogwoman. When she hears this, Granny jumps on Mark, trying to stop him. Jed tells her to go to her room, which she does, and falls asleep, dreaming that Elly marries a frog. After Jed lets her out of her room, she runs down to the pool, but sees Elly and Mark with their feet in the pool, and when they take them out, Granny sees the flippers and freaks out. Elly and Mark are getting serious, and when Drysdale hears of this, tries to get in good with Mark by saying he was in the Navy, and succeeds. Granny is still upset about Elly and Mark becoming "frog people," but Jed puts her in her room to rest. Jethro decides to make Granny feel better by bringing her frogs, two of them, and she thinks they are Mark and Elly. She sneaks out to Dr. Klinger's office so he can cure them. She leaves, and Klinger gives the frogs to Miss Jane so she can return them home. When Granny gets home, she sees Mark and Elly in human form, thinking Klinger helped. She tells them to stay out of the water, but when Mark says they can't, Granny jumps on his back.moreless
10/27/70Granny checks on Mark to make sure he is all-human. When she sees that he is, she is ready for him to marry Elly May, giving hints. Elly and Mark sit in the parlor, trying to be alone, but keep getting interrupted by the family, mostly Granny and Jethro. Even when they think they are alone, Jethro is watching them, but Elly chases him out. Granny decides to head to the bank and, since she helped her out, brings Miss Jane a frog to kiss, only if she wants to. She gets home, but sees Mark in his scuba suit, thinking he is a frog again. Jed tries to help her, but she doesn't want it. When Granny talks to Jane again, Jane suggests a psychiatrist in the bank building, Dr. Klinger. Granny visits this Dr. Klinger, and he thinks that when she talks about Elly, she means Elly is in love with a frog. But he helps Granny, and Granny tells him he doesn't know what he has done to help her, and he agrees.moreless
10/13/70Elly May continues to see Mark Templeton, the Navy Frogman, something Granny is not pleased with. She is very frightened that her granddaughter is dating someone who is "half-man, half frog." After a date Elly has with Mark and a late night movie of Jethro's, Granny begins to have nightmares about this. Granny asks Miss Jane for advice, and Jane believes the whole thing is a nightmare. She tells Granny about Zeus, and after thinking Zeus was a mountain doctor, Granny realizes she could cure Mark of his sickness. She makes a potion to turn Mark into all man, but after Mark leaves his hat and coat behind and a frog jumps in them, she sees this and thinks the potion worked backwards. After she visits Jane for more advice and is told the story of the beautiful girl kissing the frog, turning him into a man, she tells Elly to kiss the frog. After Granny heads into the house, Elly puts the frog down, and when Mark returns to get his coat and hat, Elly kisses him. Granny sees this and believes Elly's kiss did the trick.moreless
10/6/70Elly comes running to Granny with distressing news, sickness! Fairchild, Elly's bear, is sick. Meanwhile, at the bank, Miss Jane has a visitor, Lieutenant Mark Templeton of the US Navy. He is Matthew Templeton's brother. Drysdale kicks the two out, and Jane takes Mark to the Clampetts to meet the beautiful Elly. At this time, Granny made medicine for Elly May's bear, but Jethro ate it. Elly tries to remake it, but fails, and ends up looking a mess. She bumps into Mark, but Granny tells Mark that's Nelly, the hired girl. But the two actually meet, and hit it off right away. Granny has high hopes for the pair, but when Mark says he is a Naval Frogman, Granny thinks he is half man and half frog. She heads to the pool and sees Mark in the bottom half of his scuba suit from his navel down. She tells Elly, but Elly doesn't mind. She tells Jed, but Jed starts thinking this is all a result of her moonshine. Elly tells her family Mark has asked her out, but Granny isn't happy about this. Mark comes in and invites Jed and Granny, but Jed says the two won't want them tagging along. Granny continues to act strange around Mark, but Jed believes there is a reason for this and tells Mark she must have made a bad batch and pours the moonshine out.moreless
9/29/70The Clampetts are confused after being taken to a place called a Psych ward and being called "Paranoiacs and Schizophrenics." They ask Honest John what it is about. He tells them it is a mistake and promises they can see the President, just as soon as some trouble is settled. He returns to Flo and tells her he is going to take the Clampetts for another two million. She wants to go to Guatemala, but he gets her to pose. They sell Jed the Capitol, and much more of the property. Meanwhile, Jethro is trying to figure out where the countries of Paranoia or Schizophrenia are. Jed and Granny return to say they've bought more land. Honest John sells them more and more property, and at the end, he has ten million in property sold. But Elly is looking for a kitten and walks in on Honest John and Flo. The Clampetts all see this and think he is still the salt of the earth for taking in a 150 year old Native American woman. He admits she is his wife, and they are crooks. They misunderstand and still praise him, and he tears up the checks worth ten million. The Clampetts think they have over-praised him yet again.moreless
9/22/70The Clampetts head to Washington D.C to give their money to the President, and Honest John and Flo follow. Honest John convinces the Clampetts that he knows the President and that they can give him money, which he will in return give to the President. Flo poses as Sitting Hawk, the last of the District Of Colombia Native Americans. She sells Jed the White House for one million. After that, the Clampetts go to the White House to move in, but are stopped by the guard. They use some of their new District Of Colombia words to the guard. He sends for a car to take the Clampetts away. They get in the car, expecting to go visit the President, when in reality they were taken away in a police car.moreless
9/15/70Drysdale is trying to get his money back, while Jed is trying to prevent him from doing so. And Jethro is trying to come up with a way to beat the smog problem. Drysdale sends Jane over to get the money, posing as a guard. When Jed doesn't give it to him, Drysdale tells him what he's got is a drop in the bucket, and only the President could really do anything. Jed returns the money and says he plans to give all his money to the President. To help out, Jethro comes up with the electric car, after inventing the smog-causing steam car, and says he can drive them to D.C. in it. Drysdale arranges a comic to pose as the President over the phone to keep them from giving their money away, telling him Jed thinks he is worth 95 million. Rich Little, posing as Nixon, tells them to do what the man in the white coat says. When a milkman at the mansion reads a note Granny left and tells Jethro the message says they're going to Washington, the Clampetts get on a plane, and Drysdale is too late to stop them. They tell the stewardess about their plans when they meet Mr. President, which sound outrageous, and when Jed asks her how high they are flying, she tells them a lot higher than the plane.moreless
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Season 8
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