The Clampett account is now over one hundred million.
(Drysdale is complaining about Elly May)
Drysdale: She can't type. She can't do shorthand. She can't do filing, run a computer. She can't count money. She's a totally useless female!
(Jed walks in)
Jed: Who's that Mr. Drysdale?
Drysdale: What? Who? Huh? Oh! My wife.
(Elly says how Miss Jane wrote poetry for Robert, and Jane hopes it appeals to him)
Jed: Well, let's hear it.
Jane: Ode To An Ornithologist.
Granny: Well, it's short. It don't rhyme. But it's nice.
Elly: I sure am sorry you don't like animals. (leaves)
Phinney: That's alright. I don't like people either.
(Miss Jane and Elly leave so Miss Jane can get to her beauty shop appointment)
Jane: I wonder if I should have my beautician give me the full treatment.
Granny: You want some advice honey?
Drysdale: Where's Miss Hathaway?
Elly: She's at the beauty shop.
Drysdale: Well, how soon will she be here?
Elly: Well, I ain't sure. She's gettin' the full treatment.
Drysdale: Well, that takes care of today.
Elly: Him and Miss Jane is just crazy about one another.
Drysdale: You can stop after crazy.
Drysdale: Please, please! Where is the check?
Granny: Right here in my reticule. Would you like to have it?
Drysdale: Would Reagan wanna be governor again?!
Granny: That's an interesting question. What do you think Jed?
Jed: Ya got me. Let's ask Miss Jane what she thinks.
The character Mike Minor plays, Dick Bremerkamp, has the same name as the Assistant Director for most of the run of Petticoat Junction (which Mike Minor also appeared on in the last 3 seasons).