The Beverly Hillbillies

Season 8 Episode 18

Marry Me, Shorty

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Aired Unknown Jan 21, 1970 on CBS
3.3
out of 10
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17 votes
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Episode Summary

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Marry Me, Shorty
AIRED:
After remembering how much fun he had with Gloria, Shorty tries to get out of marrying Elverna Bradshaw. To prevent the marriage for a little longer and have a little fun, Shorty tells Elverna he is having a bachelor party. Granny figures Drysdale will do it, and after Jed talks to Drysdale, Drysdale says he is, after thinking Jed wants him to. After a secretary refers to how Drysdale doesn’t properly pay the secretaries and refers to it as slavery, Drysdale decides on an Oriental Slave Auction. After learning he will be a sheik with slave girls, Shorty is excited for the party, but after seeing what the harem girls at the party will be wearing, Elverna and Granny decide to attend. The party goes on, and Shorty, Jed, and Shad have a good time. But Elverna turns up to get Shorty out. To avoid marriage, Shorty handcuffs himself to Gloria, but Shad removes the handcuffs, disappointing Shorty.moreless

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SUBMIT REVIEW
    Donna Douglas

    Donna Douglas

    Elly May Clampett

    Buddy Ebsen

    Buddy Ebsen

    Jed Clampett

    Nancy Kulp

    Nancy Kulp

    Jane Hathaway

    Irene Ryan

    Irene Ryan

    Daisy Moses "Granny"

    Raymond Bailey

    Raymond Bailey

    Milburn Drysdale

    Max Baer Jr.

    Max Baer Jr.

    Jethro Bodine

    Susan Harris

    Susan Harris

    Harem Girl

    Guest Star

    Shad Heller

    Shad Heller

    Shad

    Guest Star

    Diana Bartlett

    Diana Bartlett

    slave girl #2

    Guest Star

    Shug Fisher

    Shug Fisher

    Shorty

    Recurring Role

    Elvia Allman

    Elvia Allman

    Elverna Bradshaw

    Recurring Role

    Bettina Brenna

    Bettina Brenna

    Gloria Buckles

    Recurring Role

    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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    • TRIVIA (2)

      • Granny tells Elverna that they can be harem girls because they've seen movies where Theda Bara "vamps fellows like Elmo Lincoln." Elmo Lincoln and Theda Bara never appeared in a movie together.

      • Elverna says that when she got to the gate, she looked back and noticed Shorty wasn't there. Shorty left with Gloria only about a minute or two before Elverna did, and he returned only about a few minutes after he did. So, Shorty and Gloria couldn't have gone far in about ten minutes. Where'd they go?

    • QUOTES (16)

      • Drysdale: Bring in the newest prisoner, twin of a toad.
        Jane: At once, light of the world. And may thy royal tonsils grow to the size of watermelons.
        Drysdale: I've got to get a new camel driver.

      • (Elly just took her bear away)
        Shad: Jed, that didn't seem to bother you at all.
        Jed: I'm used to it.
        Shad: Didn't scare you either Shorty.
        Shorty: Shad, when you're facing marriage to Elverna Bradshaw, five hundred pound bear don't even faze ya.

      • Elverna: I don't know if like the idea of him going to a bachelor party tonight.
        Granny: Well look at it this way Elverna, it's the last fun he's ever gonna have.

      • (Shorty is talking to Jed after being caught with Gloria, and Elverna comes out of the house, furious)
        Elverna: Shorty Kellems, where did you come from?!
        Shorty: Elverna, if you don't know that, you ain't ready to get married.
        Elverna: You know what I mean! What happened to you?
        Jed: Well uh, somethin' big come along, Elverna.
        Shorty: Yeah, and I had to grab it!
        Elverna: An opportunity?
        Jed: You could say that. Yeah.
        Elverna: Does it look promising?
        Shorty: Yeah.
        Jed: No. Well, uh, what we mean is uh, yeah it looks promising and uh, no it ain't gonna work out.
        Shorty: It ain't Jed?
        Jed: Not a chance.

      • Granny: Where's Shorty?
        Elverna: That's what I'd like to know.
        Shad: Ain't he asleep in the back seat?
        Elverna: Wait till you see what's asleep in the back seat. Wake up you hairy little critter!
        (Elverna shakes what is sleeping in Shorty's jacket)
        Granny: Sounds like Shorty to me.
        (Elly's ape comes out of Shorty's jacket)
        Granny: Land's sakes. I've heard of a frog turned into a prince, but somebody's turned Shorty into a ape. Did ya kiss him Elverna?

      • (Jed and Shad are worried about Shorty going to his bachelor party)
        Jed: I think maybe we just better show up at that party.
        Shad: I think maybe you're right.
        Jed: After all, it was us that talked Shorty into proposing to Elverna.
        Shad: It's us that's got to see it through.
        Jed: Besides that, we might just have some fun.

      • (Drysdale tells Shorty to sample some of the treats)
        Drysdale: Nectar?
        Shorty: No, I didn't touch her.

      • (A girl holds up a tray of sweets for Shorty to sample)
        Harem Girl: Candy of the East.
        Shorty: Shorty of the West! (shakes her hand) Glad to meet ya, Candy.
        Drysdale: That is a tasting, tempting confection.
        Shorty: She is that.

      • (Jane hits a gong, signaling Shorty the Sheik entrance)
        Shorty: That sure clears a feller's sinuses.

      • Drysdale: Now, I want you to take some pictures tonight so Shorty will have a record of his bachelor party.
        Gloria: Okay.
        Drysdale: "Okay Grand, Sublime, Majestic One."
        Gloria: You don't have to call me that.

      • Granny: We's seen enough of them pictures where Theda Bara vamps fellows like Elmo Lincoln. (puts a veil on) Who do I look like Elverna?
        Elverna: Ooh, Theda Bara. (puts a veil on)
        Granny: And you're a dead ringer for Elmo Lincoln.

      • Elverna: I don't like the notion of you going to that bachelor party tonight.
        Shorty: It's alright Elverna. I liked it enough for both of us.

      • Shorty: What'd you say I was supposed to be, Jethro?
        Jethro: A sheik.
        Shorty: Nah, I don't wanna be no sheik.
        Jed: What does a sheik hafta do?
        Jethro: He just lounges around on a bunch of pillows with a whole flock of pretty girls.
        Shorty: I'm a sheik!

      • (Elverna is questioning Shorty having a bachelor party)
        Elverna: Where?
        Shorty: Gloria's place.
        Elverna: Where?!
        Shorty: Glorious place. Beautiful. Just glorious.

      • (Shad, Shorty, and Jed look at the slave girls up for auction at Shorty's party)
        Jed: Ain't exactly like back home, is it Shad?
        Shad: They don't have sales like this at the emporium.

      • (The slave girls tell Jed and Shad they are for sale as a trinket is)
        Slave girl 1: We are bubbles, bangles, and beads.
        Jed: We're Jed, Shad, and Shorty.

    • NOTES (0)

    • ALLUSIONS (0)

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