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Elly May Clampett
Daisy Moses "Granny"
Bobbie Jo Bradley
Sam knows who Dash Riprock is, but where the Clampetts are from, they are still getting the movies of the 1920's. Why is Hooterville more up to date than Bugtussle, since they are both small towns?
Sam: Granny was telling me about the night Bull Montana was here.
Jed: She was, huh?
Granny: Yeah. I thought a lot of Bull.
Jed: You still do, Granny.
(Drysdale is trying to convince Granny to stay in L.A)
Drysdale: But you'll miss Hollywood. The movie stars. The excitement!
Granny: Not me. I've had this Hollywood. I'm all burned out with this wild night life.
Jed: I'm glad to hear that.
Granny: Yeah. I'm tired of being a love goddess.
Jethro: Uncle Jed, if Granny marries Sam Drucker and he totes her off to Hooterville, you and me's gonna starve to death, and that's a terrible way to go.
Jed: Elly has cooked some vittles.
Jethro: That's a even worse way to go.
(Jethro is trying to convince Sam that Granny is the plaything of Hollywood)
Jethro: Yeah. They call her the Beverly Hills Butterfly. The plaything of the stars.
Sam: Movie stars take her out?
Jethro: Take her out and keep her out. You know what time she pulled up here this mornin'?
Sam: What time?
Jethro: Purt near ten thirty.
Sam: Well, who was she out with?
Jethro: Well uh, I don't want to name no names, but they was four in the party.
Sam: Anybody famous?
Jethro: Well, driving was this here well-known Hollywood playboy, and sittin' next to him was a blonde, and there was her millionaire sugar daddy and Granny.
Sam: And this goes on all the time?
Jethro: She only comes home to change clothes. And fellers.
(Granny tells Jed she plans on keeping her dentist chair on the truck)
Granny: You know how people hate to go to the dentist. This way the dentist will go to the people.
Jed: You think folks is ready fir curb-service dentistry?
Granny: Ready, willing and anxious. Why just driving along, the minute folks seen this chair, their mouths just fell open.
(Jethro tells Sam Dash is dating Granny)
Sam: Well, ain't he kinda young fer Granny?
Jethro: How old do you think he is?
Sam: Well, on the movie screen he appears to be about twenty five or thirty.
Jethro: Sixty eight years old!
Sam: Sixty eight?!
Jethro: Just had a birthday.
Sam: Well, how can he look so?
Jethro: Make-up. When he leaves the movie studio at night, half of him stays in the dressing room.
(Dash pulls up)
Dash: Hi Jethro!
Jethro: Hi Dash! Happy sixty eight!
Dash: You mean sixty nine.
Jethro: How bout that? He's pushing seventy.
(Granny is trying to make Sam think she is the plaything of Hollywood)
Granny: But don't put him too near the cement pond, that'll be noisy too. What with Johnny Weissmuller splashin' around and beatin' his chest, and givin' the mating call of the bull ape.
Sam: Ain't he Tarzan?
Granny: Him Tarzan. Me Granny.
(Jed comes in the kitchen where Elly is making donuts)
Jed: Elly May, you hadn't oughtta be playin' with fire that way. It's dangerous.
Elly: But Pa, I'm cookin' with it.
Jed: Yeah, that's when it's dangerous.
Granny: Old violins make the sweetest music. Course, ya have to have the right beau. (laughs) That's a witty sayin' Jed.
Jed: Not too witty.
Granny: Well, it beats, "Well doggies."
(The telephone operator gives Granny her telegram)
Operator: This telegram is from a Mr. Sam Drucker in Hooterville.
Granny: Sam Drucker?! He's my sweetie!
Operator: Congratulations. Uh, here's the message: Have been trying to get you for some time.
Granny: That's the truth! You know he proposed to me by mail once, but Elly's bear ate my letter.
Operator: I see. Uh, then he says: Am coming to Hollywood for my prize.
Granny: Well that bold rascal! Comin' to carry me off, is he? Well, it won't be that easy. He's gonna hafta court me first.
Operator: Yes. Um, well the message concludes: Will call on arrival.
Granny: Well, that's a good joke on Sam. He ain't got no rival.
(Granny is trying to figure out where to put her dentist chair)
Granny: Well, take it in the parlor; set it up in front of the fire place.
Jed: Granny, that's the courtin' parlor. Wouldn't look too romantic having a dentist chair sittin' in there.
Granny: With all the courtin' that's gone on in that parlor, we could have an electric chair in there.
Jed: Elly May might have some uh young gentlemen callers.
Granny: Jed, when are you gonna face the truth? That girl is too old to get a husband.
This is Larry Pennell's last appearance as Dash Riprock in the series.
Duke has puppies and a wife in this episode. However, we never see either again, and we never learned of them in prior episodes.
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