The last time Gloria saw Shorty, she was extremely upset at him since he wasn't worth 200 million, and wanted to drown him. But in this episode, she is extremely happy to see him. Why'd she change so suddenly?
If Shorty's car was hidden in bushes, why didn't the Clampetts find it? And when the Clampetts spent time in Hooterville, did he stay in the house, or just the root cellar? What was he doing on their property then?
(Granny says that the food robber has struck again)
Shad: Jed, let's you and me track down the rascal. We can find him.
Granny: This time he even took my goat cheese!
Jed: We best arm ourselves Shad. We's lookin' fer a desperate man.
Elverna: Oh Shorty, you're cute.
Shorty: Ya know somethin', after a month in the root cellar, you don't look bad yourself.
Jed: Uh, Mr. Drysdale, why don't you and Miss Jane stay and take vittles with us. Granny's got some goat cheese that nobody stole.
Drysdale: Goat cheese?
Jed: Yeah. It's been in the root cellar for eight years. If it's gone, it's got up and walked away by itself.
Drysdale: No, we have to get back to the bank, so we'll have to pass up on the goat cheese. Do you want me to send the police over?
Jed: No. I don't believe they'll eat it neither.
Jed: Elverna won the Silver Dollar City Beauty Contest.
Shorty: Uh, just a minute. (hits his ear)
Jed: What's the matter Shorty?
Shorty: It's somethin' in my ear. Sounded like you said Elverna won the beauty contest.
Shad: She did.
Shorty: She must have been the only one in it.
(Granny and Jed are talking about Elverna Bradshaw)
Granny: When she was one year old, she bit her own brother.
Jed: Lots of younins do that.
Granny: Not in the neck!
(Shorty is talking about Elverna winning the beauty contest)
Shorty: Elverna won hands down, goin' away.
Granny: Did he say "hands down, goin' away?"
Granny: I guess she could win in that position. Always has been her best side.
(Shorty tells Granny Elverna's coming out so they can quickly marry)
Granny: What's the big hurry?
Shorty: Granny, I'm marrying a beauty queen.
Granny: I thought you was marrying Elverna.
Shorty: And finally she said to me, "Shorty Kellems," she said, " The only way you'll ever get your hands on this hotel again is if you marry me."
Shad: What did you say Shorty?
Shorty: Shad, I thought it over for a minute. Then I hit her with them three little words: kiss my foot.
(Shad and Jed just convinced Shorty they both had dreams about being stranded with Elverna to try to get him to take interest)
Shad: Jed, did you sure enough dream of being alone on an island with Elverna?
Jed: Worst nightmare I ever had.
(Shad says that his wife won second in the redecorating beauty contest)
Jed: How in the world would you beautify a blacksmith's shop?
Shad: I left town.
(Shad and Jed tell Granny Shorty has repented his ways, but Shorty has also, besides prayed, had some of Granny's jug)
Granny: Got the Spirit, huh?
Shorty: Who told you? Oh, oh, that Spirit. Yeah.
Shad: Dogged if you was filled with the Spirit.
Shorty: Oh I was. Granny left a couple of jugs in there. I'd sneak a snort, snack, snooze, and go to repenting again.
Jed: He's the only blacksmith in the hills ever to shoo a full growed elephant.
Drysdale: You're joking.
Jane: He shoed an elephant?
Jed: Yep. This elephant got loose from a circus and wandered into Shad's cabbage patch, and Shad shooed him away.
Jane: Oh, that kind of shoo! (giggles)
Jed: Makes a good story the way Shad tells it. He leaves out that part about the cabbage patch.
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