Bernadette: So, did you spend last night hearing about this silly parking space fight, too?
Amy: For hours. Fortunately, I couldn't understand most of it 'cause Sheldon was wearing that stupid robot mask.
Bernadette: Howard was so angry I had to mash up Benadryl in his ice cream to get him to fall asleep.
Amy: I guess this is what we get for being with two testosterone-fueled alpha males. At some point, they're bound to lock horns.
Penny: I'm assuming these are some kind of horns they bought at Comic-Con?
Bernadette: I'm really sorry they took Sheldon's spot away. He shouldn't have to suffer just because Howard's such a big deal now.
Amy: I know, Sheldon should just let Howard have his little moment in the sun.
Bernadette: What's that supposed to mean?
Amy: Well, Howard's never gonna go to space again, but Sheldon will always be a genius.
Bernadette: You're right. And I'm sure Sheldon will get a fancy parking spot again, if and when he makes a worthwhile contribution to science.
Amy: If and when?
Penny: Okay, maybe we should change the subject. Amy, how are your lady parts? Still chilly down there?
Bernadette: Hang on. None of Sheldon's theories have ever been definitively proven. My husband actually went to outer space.
Amy: That's an impressive accomplishment. He's now an inspiration to millions of Americans who know you don't have to be special or even qualified to go into space.
Penny: You know, I remember the first time I got a bikini wax. My sister did it with melted Crayolas and duct tape. (laughing) It's a bad idea...
Bernadette: Gosh, Amy. I'm sensing a little hostility. Is it maybe because, like Sheldon's work, your sex life is also theoretical? (Amy is shocked.)
Penny: (tries not to laugh) Damn.
Amy: Yeah, well, at least when we do make love, Sheldon won't be thinking about his mother.
(Penny and Bernadette are shocked.)
Amy: And yes, that is a cleverly veiled reference to Howard's lifelong obsession to crawl back into her spacious womb.
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