The Big C Season 1 Episode 1

Cathy: (to her class) Anybody ever seen The Patriot? Its depiction of the American Revolution is about 20 percent accurate at best. But if you understood this version as truth, you'd still know more about that time in history than 99 percent of Americans. And Mel Gibson is medium good. Enjoy.

Cathy: What's the problem?
Police Officer: This your house?
Cathy: No, I live in the next town over, I just like to walk around in my robe.

Cathy: You're late again, Andrea.
Andrea: Yeah, but I figured since you usually spend the first ten minutes of every class trying to get to your point, I didn't miss a whole lot.

Cathy: You can't be fat and mean, Andrea.
Andrea: What?
Cathy: You heard me. If you're gonna dish it out, you got to be able to lick it up. Fat people are jolly for a reason. Fat repels people, but joy attracts them. Now, I know everyone's laughing at your cruel jokes, but nobody's inviting you to the prom. So you can either be fat and jolly or a skinny bitch. It's up to you.

Cathy: I never noticed what a handsome guy you are. No wonder my friend Holly had such a crush on you in High School. She'd come over to hang out, I'd catch her in your room staring at your clothes.
Sean: I never knew that.
Cathy: It grossed me out to think of you two together, so I told her you were gay.
Sean: Oh, well. I guess she thinks she lost her virginity to a gay guy then.