The Colbert Report

Season 2 Episode 34

Al Franken

0
Aired Weekdays 11:30 PM Mar 15, 2006 on Comedy Central
9.3
out of 10
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12 votes
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Al Franken
AIRED:
TONIGHT: Stephen Colbert welcomes the host of The Al Franken Show, Al Franken!

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SUBMIT REVIEW
  • Stephen and Al Franken talk about Bill O'Reilly.

    8.4
    The show opens with a teaser of content from the show, which involves everything from what it takes to be a man to the SAT's.



    Stephen stats off the show by expressing his anger about last night's episode of Scarborough Country. Stephen explains that he's upset about a piece of viewer mail Joe received, and it seems the viewer questioned whether or not Joe is retarded. Stephen then receives a letter which clarifies things for Stephen.



    Stephen moves on to the story about a man who's spreading his seed through sperm banks. He's fathered 14 children now, and it seems he's trying to opt out of the program, but women are clamoring for his sperm. Stephen's problem with this is the donor wants to remain anonymous, and Stephen despises anonymous donors. Stephen has decided to put his own sperm up for sale on his website.



    Moving on, Stephen talks about his time at a spa, where he took a love test in a magazine. It seems Stephen didn't do well. Along with the SAT's, Stephen questions the importance of these tests, which brings us to tonight's edition of "The Word", which is "None of the Above." Stephen suggests overhauling the testing process dramatically.



    Back from commercial, Stephen welcomes tonight's guest, Al Franken. They discussed politics and Bill O'Reilly. At the end, Stephen asked Al to stick around to answer questions from viewers.



    Back from commercial, Stephen asks viewers to call in and ask Al questions. A few of the questions were about why Al hates our troops and another ended up involving a girl who wanted to know where her boyfriend was last night.



    Back from commercial, Stephen ends the show with another edition of "The Craziest F#?king Thing I've Ever Heard". It seems a young man is practicing wrestling for college by wrestling a bear, something Stephen thinks the whole thing is ridiculous and dangerous.



    I thought tonight's episode was above average, mostly because Al Franken has a good sense of humor and the bit about the anonymous sperm donor was hilarious. Everything else was pretty average.moreless

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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  • TRIVIA (1)

  • QUOTES (2)

    • Stephen: Isn't thinking the coward's way out?

    • Stephen: ...which brings us to tonight's Word: None of the above. Now the company that grades the SATs, Pierson Educational Measurement, says the problem was the grading sheets got ruined when they were caught in the rain. (Dog ate your hopes for college) They said they couldn't be then scored properly, but you know, people are always blaming the scoring (Like Diebold machines) Now, I scored very well in the SAT's, I'm pretty sure I got an A. (Combined score: 95) But, like many people, this debacle has made me question the value of this test for college placement. I mean, does it really matter if an applicant knows the antonym to the word sagacious? (Unwise) Or can factor the cosign of a 24 degree angle, (0.913545) or measure the area of an irregular hole in a rotating plane. (My brain done broke) Now those answers can just looked up in books. (Those heavy things propping up your TV)

      If we want to college place students properly, we shouldn't measure what they know, we should measure who they are with tough questions like this: Can American be wrong? Answer this question with two letters or less. Now, surprisingly, not everyone gets that one right. (Al Franken) It's bad enough that my kids might go to a college full of liberal, blame America first professors, with PhD's from the University of Cut N Run. (Go, Fightin' Pacifists!) I need to know that when they get there, they'll at least be surrounded by the right kind of people. By the way, I think that would make a great first question on the test. And the right kind of people are the ones who would be successful whether or not they went to college. The likelihood of landing a high paying job is rarely measured in facts or SAT scores. (Measured in dad's bank account) So, how should we prepare our kids for college, by cramming their heads with vocabulary, by drilling them on their math skills, or simply by instilling them with an ethos of hard work no matter what the subject? The answer: None of the above.

      And that's the Word.

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