The Colbert Report

Season 2 Episode 25

Brett O'Donnell

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Aired Weekdays 11:30 PM Feb 28, 2006 on Comedy Central
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Brett O'Donnell
AIRED:
TONIGHT: Stephen Colbert welcomes the director of debate at King's College, Brett O'Donnell!

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  • TRIVIA (1)

  • QUOTES (1)

    • Stephen: ...which brings us to tonight's Word: Laissez Les Bons Temps Rouler! Which I believe translates as (Let the good times roll!) Show us your tits! Through the sheer power of alcohol and bare breasts the Deep South has risen again. ("Gone with the Wind" gone wild) Now some people thought Mardi Gras in New Orleans wasn't appropriate this year, but it's more that just a party there, Mardi Gras is part of the economy. It's no different than re-opening a factory. (A puke factory) You know, it's great to see New Orleans up and running like a normal American city. Like Los Angles, Chicago or Washington, its public face is nice, brightly lit, filled with happy people spending money, and we rarely think of the other part that houses a permanent underclass which is trapped in a cycle of [picture of naked girl] Whoa ho! I could look at that again! Wish I had me some beads right now! You mademoiselle are la toulamond. I'm sorry, what was I talking about? (Permanent Underclass) Right, okay. Hurricane Katrina revealed the deep poverty that already existed in so many of our cities, poverty that for some reason we as a nation choose not [Another naked girl] Hey heeee! How you all are? That is one spice remulard right there yesiree I do declare. I'm sorry, where was I? (Deep poverty) Right, right, okay. Which is a terrible human tragedy, and tragedies are like facts, you gotta pretend they don't exist.

      Nowhere is this more needed than in Iraq. Like New Orleans, they've got a ruined infrastructure and rampant unemployment. Right now the only growth area is the insurgency. (A booming economy) You know what they need? (Electricity, water, highways, food, employment, a police force) Iraqi Gras. (Iraqi Gras) It's a great way to win the hearts and minds of the Iraqi people. (And destroy their livers) Now certain adjustments will have to be made to Mardi Gras. For instance Muslims aren't supposed to consume alcohol, (Sure, but neither are freshmen) instead of drinking Hurricanes, they'll need to come up with their own name for a cocktail. (The Desert Storm?) And with any luck, next year young men in Baghdad will be tossing beads off beads of balconies and shouting laissez les bons temps rouler. Which I believe translates as: show us your nose! Iraqi Gras will make jobs, raise spirits, and most importantly, draw our attention away from the parts of Iraq we'd rather not think about. (All of it)

      And that's the Word.

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