The Colbert Report

Season 2 Episode 32

Christopher Buckley

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Aired Weekdays 11:30 PM Mar 13, 2006 on Comedy Central
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Christopher Buckley
AIRED:
TONIGHT: Stephen Colbert welcomes the author of Thank You for Smoking : A Novel, Christopher Buckley!

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  • TRIVIA (1)

  • QUOTES (1)

    • Stephen: ...which brings us to tonight's Word: Sidney Poitier. Now of course the Sopranos portrayal of Italians is unfair, most Italians are not mobsters, most Italians are boring. They take their kids to school, pay their taxes, and when you meet them at a barbeque, everybody thinks the same thing, (Italians eat barbeque?) they think "He doesn't look like he would kill me." You see, in comparison to an ethnic stereotype, everybody looks pretty good. That's why stereotypes are the best tools we have to feel good about ourselves. ("I'm a credit to my race!") Now, just consider Sidney Poitier for a moment. Sidney's a noble embodiment of African-American experiences. (Previous embodiment: Al Jolson) He shattered stereotypes and rose above the nations racist misconceptions, (Like an African-American Rosa Parks) and folks, so can all of us. Now you might be saying to yourself, but Sidney Poitier is a great actor and an activist, I'm nothing special.

      Well, let me tell you, if the stereotype against your ethnicity is crude and revolting enough, you can seem like Sidney Poitier by just showing up to work. (Without goosestepping Wolfgang) And it gives us something to be big hearted about. Without hideous generalizations, none of us would get to say: You're wrong, I know some Irish people who are not drunks. (Name one) We can feel like heroes just by being barely civil, and stereotyping is a great tool for politics. (See: Gay Marriage) For instance, the war on terror, thinking all Arabs are dangerous helped us sell the war in Iraq. And then, set the stage for the President to be big hearted and lease our ports to Dubai. The Emirs were clearly peaceful, business friendly allies in the war on terror. They were supposed to by the Sidney Poitiers of Arabs. (Guess Who's Running Our Ports?) It's a shame we didn't recognize that, and I offer the U.A.E. government my apologies. (To Emir, with love)

      And that's the Word.

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