TV.com will be making changes to the Private Message system the week of Jan 26, 2015. For more information click here

The Colbert Report

Season 6 Episode 18

Eliot Spitzer

0
Aired Weekdays 11:30 PM Feb 02, 2010 on Comedy Central
8.3
out of 10
User Rating
5 votes
0

EPISODE REVIEWS
By TV.com Users

Episode Summary

EDIT
Eliot Spitzer
AIRED:
Tonight Stephen welcomes the former New York Governor and current columnist for Slate.com, Eliot Spitzer. Also, Stephen talks with Pulitzer Prize winning journalist Henry Allen about the passing of J.D. Salinger.
Friday
No results found.
Saturday
No results found.
Sunday
No results found.
SUBMIT REVIEW

    Watch Online

    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

    FILTER BY TYPE

    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (2)

      • Stephen: Tonight: A new website takes social networking to the next level. Don't worry, you still won't have to leave your parent's basement. Then: My tribute to author J.D. Salinger, featuring the world premiere of the J.D. Salinger dancers. And my guest Eliot Spitzer is happy to see Obama getting tough on Wall Street. I bet he's pretty stoked about that Tiger Woods business. Happy Black History Month to all my black viewer. This is the Colbert Report.

      • Stephen: Since you know everything I do, everything I do is important, therefore my life has meaning. I only wish everybody's did, luckily now it can, and it brings us to tonight's Word: Cognoscor Ergo Sum. I am known, therefore I am. It's natural to want to be known by other people, in fact the Bible says this about the coming kingdom of God: "Now wee see as through a glass darkly…But when I shall know even as I am known." The point is in Heaven everyone is a celebrity. (Hell is a VH-1 reality show) Thankfully folks, just like us celebrities, ordinary people can publicize their lives in minute detail thanks to social networking sites like MySpace, Facebook and Twitter. (What's MySpace?) Which reminds me, I forgot to Tweet that I'm doing the Word. OMG, Word going great. Best audience ever. Also, easily manipulated. (Use Verizon wireless)

        Now unfortunately sometimes I have to interrupt my tweeting, sexting and inbetwexting to buy or eat things, but now there's a way to do it all, (Have your cake and tweet it too) and it's all thanks to blippy.com, a revolutionary new site that let's you register your credit card online then every purchase you make is automatically posted on blippy. And the posts, or…uh,blips? Bloops? Bleeps? Make riveting readings. Let's see, someone named herchenroder spent $10.94 at Wendy's, pud spent $149.97 at something called Serepath direct marketing, scottelkin spent $7.68 at Panda Express. Wow! This is more exciting that going through old receipts. It's going through new receipts! (The cutting edge of boring) But folks, just as great as blippy is, it only cover's one aspect of your life. (Or your identity thief's life) But we know that you're more than just a collection of purchases, you also have sex. (Sometimes with your purchases) Thankfully there is also a site called ijustmadelove.com where a map shows the locations in the world where people just had sex. Presumably so you can avoid those places. (Until they're Purell-ed) Now unfortunately ijustmadelove.com limits your choices to one of six positions and four locations, indoor, outdoor, on a boat or in a car. I'm sorry, I've eaten green eggs and ham in more locations than that, if you know what I mean.

        But just shopping and sex, surely we can be more invasive than that. How about a site that tweets when you crap? (creepy) Or to make sure people know how often you're checking how often people are checking your posts, you'll want to sign up for checky, which generates a new post every time you check to see who's checking your checky. (Your checkmates) Or better yet folks, we can combine them into one site called knowny, which records every interaction, every movement of every person on Earth and posts them online like a storm of random data points that shouts out to the blind and indifferent universe: We exist! We exist! Please! Please let this mean something! Then we'll be full known, except for who we really are, because that's kind of personal. (Cognoscor ergo sum)

        And that's the Word.

    • NOTES (0)

    • ALLUSIONS (0)

    Season 6 Episodes

    See All
    Ep 162
    Paul Simon
    Ep 160
    Laird Hamilton
    Ep 159
    Stephen Sondheim
    Ep 158
    Patti Smith
    Ep 157
    December 13, 2010 - Pat...
    Ep 157
    Julie Taymor
    Ep 156
    Steve Martin
    Ep 155
    Julie & David Eisenhower
    Ep 154
    Garry Trudeau
    Ep 154
    December 06, 2010 - Gar...
    Ep 153
    David Stockman
    Ep 152
    Michelle Rhee
    Ep 151
    Tom Vilsack
    Ep 150
    Dan Savage
    Ep 150
    November 29, 2010 - Dan...
    Ep 149
    Staff Sgt. Salvatore Gi...
    Ep 149
    November 18, 2010 - Sal...
    Ep 148
    Ian Frazier
    Ep 147
    John Legend
    Ep 146
    David Stern
    Ep 145
    11/18/2010
    Ep 145
    Quincy Jones
    Ep 144
    11/17/2010
    Ep 144
    Martha Stewart
    Ep 143
    11/16/2010
    Ep 143
    Cee-Lo Green
    more
    More
    Less