The Colbert Report

Season 4 Episode 65

Jennifer Hooper McCarty

Aired Weekdays 11:30 PM May 13, 2008 on Comedy Central
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Episode Summary

Jennifer Hooper McCarty
Tonight Stephen welcomes the co-author of What Really Sank the Titanic: New Forensic Discoveries, Jennifer McCarty.
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    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (1)

      • During his "Better Know a Lobby" talk about the Brady Campaign and gun control, Stephen Colbert removes many guns from his jacket, one of which is the original Nintendo gun that was used with the game Duck Hunt.

    • QUOTES (5)

      • Stephen Colbert: (intro) Tonight, I profile an anti-gun lobbyist. He'll end this interview not with a bang but a whimper. And my guest, Jennifer Hooper McCarty, has written a book about what really sank the Titanic. The smart money is on Leonardo DiCaprio's schvantz. You put your left foot in, you take your left out, you put your left foot in and you shake it all about. Who knew Restless Leg Syndrome was so much fun? This is the Colbert Report.

      • Stephen Colbert: Why were there substandard rivets? This is the unsinkable ship.
        Jennifer Hooper McCarty: I went to England exactly to try to figure out the answer to that question…
        Stephen Colbert: Go on, I'm on the edge of my chair. I'm picturing you in a musty archive with a flashlight, maybe being hunted by bad guys.
        Jennifer Hooper McCarty: I learned that the board was under a lot of pressure. They were building three ships at one time…and they were trying to find iron wherever they could. So, they actually ordered iron that wasn't as high a quality and they were using unskilled workers to build the ship. So, all these things combined with decisions that they made and they all add up to explain what really sank the Titanic.
        Stephen Colbert: What about the theory, and this is my private theory, that there were too many poor people on the lower decks? What about that? If it had been just like the Astors and that crowd, it wouldn't have sunk, right? God wouldn't have let that happen. By the way, what about this theory that God sank it because he didn't want a rich girl like Kate Winslet sleeping with a poor guy like Leonardo DiCaprio?

      • Stephen Colbert: We know what sank the Titanic. History has shut the book. It was an iceberg which I call the terrorist of the high seas. That is why I am in favor of global warming. It is payback time, baby! Payback!
        Jennifer Hooper McCarty: You think that the book has been shut. But in actuality the iceberg is just the trigger for the event. It was really faulty rivets…It turns out that they had substandard iron in sections of the ship that actually hit the iceberg.
        Stephen Colbert: How do you know this? You're making this stuff up. Have you been done there and yanked one of them there rivets out there? Have you done it? Have you done it? Have you done it?
        Jennifer Hooper McCarty: I have my PhD in metallurgy.
        Stephen Colbert: Oh, you're an elitist. Oh, excuse me. I guess you know more than James Cameron then because you have a PhD.

      • Stephen Colbert: Hillary, of course, has long been predicted to win [in West Virginia]…this is great news…the contest will continue…this is what the American people want and I know that because I read it today in today's The USA today which ran this headline "Dems say let the contest continue" just above this much smaller headline "But more say Clinton should quit, polls show." That is journalism. Well done The USA Today. Thank you for reminding us that this historic primary…is what the people want, just not most of them.

      • Stephen Colbert: (to guest) I'm not saying your theory is wrong. I'm saying I reject it.

    • NOTES (1)

      • Better Know A Lobby: The gun control lobby. Stephen talks with the president of the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence, Paul Helmke.

    • ALLUSIONS (0)

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