The Colbert Report

Season 2 Episode 33

Keith Olbermann

Aired Weekdays 11:30 PM Mar 14, 2006 on Comedy Central
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Episode Summary

Keith Olbermann
TONIGHT: Stephen Colbert welcomes the host of Countdown with Keith Olbermann, Keith Olbermann!

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  • Keith Olbermann talks about his feud with Bill O'Reilly.

    The show opens with a teaser of content from the show, which involves everything from the Enron trial to labor unions.

    Stephen starts off the show by mentioning the new suit he had to buy because he apparently gained a little weight recently.

    Stephen quickly moves into a segment about the way the media portrays figures like President Bush and Vice President Cheney by the use of skillful photo crops. Stephen says the media should stop being biased and to stop using the silly photo crops in the news articles.

    Moving on, Stephen can't help buy talk about the Enron trial, which is taking place in Texas. It seems people are blaming one another, which brings us to tonight's edition of "The Word," which is "Scapegoat." With all of the finger pointing going on about Iraq, Hurricane Katrina, etc, Stephen has decided to blame it on an actual goat. He even says his weight gain is because of the goat (Stephen likes goat cheese).

    Back from commercial, Stephen introduces a segment called "Was It Really That Bad?" This segment focuses on labor unions, which have been great for people, but their importance has since been questioned. The labor unions were important early on because of better wages, of course, but also better working conditions, saving a lot of lives over the years. Stephen ends up going into a little rant about his own life about work and his relationship with a girl name Jenny.

    Back from commercial, Stephen welcomes tonight's guest, Keith Olbermann. They talked about everything from the differences in the audiences for news shows and sports shows to Bill O'Reilly, who has been feuding with Keith Olbermann in recent weeks.

    Back from commercial, Stephen ends the show by apologizing about a "Wag of the Finger" he gave Kareem Abdul Jabbar for a documentary he had been working on. It seems Stephen has since been found out more about the documentary and apologized. To make amends, Stephen invited Kareem to be in his the sequel to his own video. He then rolls the video of himself and Kareem playing music and basketball.

    There really wasn't much to highlight in tonight's episode. Everything seemed to fall into the "average" category. The final segment with Kareem was a waste of time; I'm not sure I even broke a smile for it. For the interview with Keith Olbermann, I was expecting more of them both. I know Olbermann and O'Reilly have been feuding recently, and I guess I wanted more somehow.moreless

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (1)

  • QUOTES (2)

    • Stephen Colbert: To this day, when I sneeze really hard, it looks like Tinker Bell farted.

    • Stephen: ...which brings us to tonight's Word: Scapegoat. Doesn't anybody understand this word anymore? It's a reference to Leviticus 16. (Collect them all!) Where it says the high priest should put all the sins of the village on one goat, and, to take the sins away, to drive the goat into the wilderness. (Or, if the goat is gay, stone it) Fastow was the goat. But the whole point of the scapegoat is ruined if the goat wanders back into the village and testifies against the high priest. (Turngoat) Andrew Fastow can't wait to blame Jeff Skilling and Ken Lay even though those guys made him both C.F.O. and C.F.G. (Chief Fall Guy) Look Fastow, you're already heading to prison, why not except all the responsibility. Take it like a man. (Before you take it like a bitch) It's just getting to be how to be the goat anymore. Like Michael Brown. We all agree he was responsible for the botched Katrina response. (Heckuva job, Goatie) But six months later he's saying it Michael Chertoff's fault, Bush was warned about the levees and take a look at this videotape that proves I'm right. Well, I've got a message for Mr. Brown and for Mr. Fastow: Blame doesn't go up, blame goes down. (First Law of Blame-O-Dynamics)

      So, who's responsible for these failures of scapegoating? Well, some respond that we should blame ourselves, that this is what happens when you don't punish the right person, when you don't hold your leaders accountable. But I'll tell you who I blame, this guy, Buster, he's a Hereford Short-Haired Goat, and he's bad news. Not only do I blame him for the failure to assign lasting blame. I blame him for the poor planning in Iraq, the torture scandal, the rise in poverty, Hamas winning the election, global warming, shooting that old lawyer in the face and I'm pretty sure he's the reason I'm gaining all this weight. (Stephen loves goat cheese) Look, enough is enough Buster! You are out of here! I will not sit idly by and let you ruin America. (Or eat my daisies) And if I ever see you around here again, I'll tell you one thing, please don't talk about that thing I did with that thing in that place that one time, keep it on the q.t. (Bleat's the word)

      And that's the Word.

  • NOTES (0)


    • Stephen Colbert: To this day, when I sneeze really hard, it looks like Tinker Bell farted.

      Tinker Bell is a character from the Peter Pan story.

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