The Colbert Report

Season 3 Episode 21

Michael Oppenheimer

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Aired Weekdays 11:30 PM Feb 12, 2007 on Comedy Central
8.7
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Michael Oppenheimer
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Tonight Stphen welcomes professor of geoscience and international affiars at the Woodrow Wilson School, Michael Oppenheimer
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    • TRIVIA (1)

    • QUOTES (4)

      • Stephen: I gotta say, I really had to hand it to the Academy for sticking it to Al Gore. There is no better way to welcome a radical, left wing, eco nut job than a forest worth of confetti. Yeah. Those trees aren't absorbing much CO2 now, hmmm.

      • Stephen: …it brings us to tonight's Word: Inappropriate. That's the word the inspector general used to describe Feith's manipulation of intelligence. I say calling Douglas Feith's action inappropriate is a compliment. It just means that in the run up to the war he was thinking outside the box. (And outside the Pentagon) You see folks, back in 2002 Feith's job was to analyze the American intelligence community's conclusions about Iraq and Al-Qaeda. He found a major flaw in the CIA's intelligence, namely that it didn't support the administration's desire to attack Iraq. And he wasn't afraid to be "inappropriate" and say the CIA was wrong. (If by wrong you mean right) And folks, that took courage. But is Feith tooting his own horn about this? (Too busy whistling past graveyard) No, listen to what he recently said about his pre-war report fabricating the link between Saddam and Al-Qaeda quote: "…in presenting it, I was not endorsing its substance." Don't be so modest Doug. Putting Al-Qaeda in Iraq may have taken some imagination back then but thanks to inappropriateness you made it a reality. (Feith-Based initiative) But the most important thing about the inspector general's conclusions is the while the found that Feith was inappropriate, nowhere did they find that the law was broken. (Just Iraq was broken) So inappropriate, not illegal. That's an important distinction and it's the reason the report is such an important victory for the administration. (Misleading accomplished) You see breaking into you neighbors house is illegal, using the spare key he keeps at your place to go and set up some hidden cameras, that's just inappropriate. (And a show on MTV) Now if you do something illegal you can go to jail, if you do something inappropriate you can go to teach at the Edmond A. Walsh School of Foreign Service at Georgetown University. Calling this manipulation of intelligence illegal would just start a whole new round of investigations and questions like: How far up the chain of command does this illegality go? Nobody wants that. (The buck stops way over there) But calling Feith's actions inappropriate puts and end to the investigations. What happened, happened and the administration knows never do it again or they will suffer the same punishment as Feith. (None)

        And that's the Word.

      • Stephen: Happy birthday Charles Darwin, in Hell !! This is the Colbert Report.

      • Stephen: Upstate New York got so much snow, some of the snow flakes are actually the same.

    • NOTES (0)

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