The Colbert Report Season 1 Episode 28

Stephen: …which takes us to tonight's Word: Satisfied? I'm not saying that over the years Native Americans haven't gotten a bit of a runaround, (Around the continent) but are reparations really the answer? Now I don't talk about this much, but I'm 1/13th Chicasaw. ("Colbert" in Chicasaw: "Soars like eagle") In fact, some of my best friends are Indians. So, I understand this issue in a way you Anglos don't. I get it. Hey, I want to be compensated, (1/13 of me) I just don't think I should have to pay for it. (The other 12/13) Money is not as important as honoring them with things like this stamp. As Sitting Bull once said, Honor is worth more than 100 billion dollars. (U.S. Government translator) As for honoring, this stamp goes a long way. (Not "Trail of Tears" long) Here's the best part, first class postage goes up to 39 cents next month, and if you but your stamps in bulk like I do, my postman gave me a great price on 37 cent stamps. ($370 for 1000) You are going to be using a lot of these things, to kick it up to 39 cents. Indians are going to be constantly on your mind. (And your tongue)

But, you know, it may not be enough. The United States has tried before to appease our Native brethren. Take the Sacagawea dollar. (The golden "Sac") I pay for everything with those. I use them all the time. They're convenient, and best of all, my neighborhood businesses remember me now. ("The f@#king dollar coin guy") Besides, we tried reparations before. We gave Japanese Americans monetary reparations for World War II, and apparently it didn't work because the internment camp thing is still in our history books. We had a deal, they reneged. (Indian givers) The fact is, America gives and gives and gives. (In between takes) Well, let me throw in my 2 cents here, (nicely done) some people are never satisfied.

And that's the Word.