The Colbert Report

Season 2 Episode 17

Sen. Barbara Boxer

Aired Weekdays 11:30 PM Feb 06, 2006 on Comedy Central
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Episode Summary

Sen. Barbara Boxer
TONIGHT: Stephen Colbert welcomes California Senator Barbara Boxer!

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  • Killer bees are this week's biggest threat!

    The show opens with a teaser of content from the show, which involves everything from foreign oil to Barbara Boxer.

    Stephen starts off the show by congratulating Jon Stewart and his wife for having another baby.

    Stephen then moves on to a story about Newsweek including a tiny photo of Stephen on the cover of their magazine. Although the photo is small, Stephen suggests its placement is a location where important news has been announced, and he goes on to show some ridiculous examples.

    Stephen then mentions the Super Bowl and the State of the Union Address. Stephen rolls clips of President Bush's speech, particularly the parts where the President pledged to decrease the need for foreign oil. It now seems the President's words were not meant "literally," according to the Administration. This brings us to tonight's edition of "The Word," which is "Metaphorically." Stephen goes on about how nothing the President says or does is expected to be taken literally, but metaphorically.

    Back from commercial, we interrupt Stephen, who's busy reading his copy of Newsweek. He gets right into this week's edition of "Threat Down." Number five is newspapers, specifically a couple of East Coast papers who printed on recycled paper, which happened to reveal financial records. Coming in at number four is iPods for causing hearing loss. Tunneling is the third top threat, as it seems people escaped from a Yemenese prison through a tunnel, and there was a drug tunnel between the U.S. and Canada. Number two is tolerance, which is responsible for the Danish cartoons, which have enraged Muslims. Finally, killer bees are the number one threat. Stephen says they've invaded Florida and are conspiring with bears to kill humans.

    Back from commercial, Stephen welcomes Senator Barbara Boxer. They chat about the President and her book, with Stephen reading passages from the book, which causes Barbara to stop him, making for a hilarious moment, with Stephen completely breaking character.

    The interview was great from a comedy standpoint. I loved seeing Stephen lose it; the look on his face with Barbara Boxer snatched the piece of paper from his hands was priceless.moreless

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (0)

  • QUOTES (1)

    • Stephen: ... which brings us to tonight's Word: Metaphorically. Turns out not everyone understood the President's pledge. On Wednesday the Department of Energy cleared it all up. According to the Knight Ridder news service quote "His Energy Secretary and National Economic Advisor said the President did not mean it literally." Of course he didn't. Any pundit will tell you the words like President Bush's are the sugar spun stuff of dreams. He's a political William Carlos Williams (So much depends on 75% by 2025) and he's a master of literary essentials like metaphors (Saddam = Osama) fables ("Elected" in 2000) and knock-knock jokes. (Orange you glad there's a 22nd Amendment?)

      Literal interpretations don't work. To really understand what the President means you have to dig beneath the surface. (Of a National Park) The fact is Bush is following in the footsteps of his favorite political philosopher: (Toby Keith?) Jesus. Jesus said it's easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for rich man to get into Heaven. That doesn't make any sense at all. (To rich people) Like Jesus, sometimes it's difficult to understand the President. (Thick southern Connecticut drawl) There is one difference between President Bush and Jesus: (It's a big one.) the President has Samuel Bodman, Secretary of Energy.

      When Bush speaks, Bodman can interpret his words. (Bush whisperer) Interpretations like the ones he made Wednesday about the President's energy initiative. It's quote "purely an example", "not meant to suggest anything..." and "...this President is extremely enthused about nuclear energy. He is very committed to it. That's a factual statement." And as such probably a fluke. Bodman's point is that Bush is speaking to us in the simplest way he can about truths we can't comprehend because they're too enormous. (Like Exxon's profits) We can understand we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil, what we can't understand is why we won't even try. (Literally)

      And that's the Word

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