The Colbert Report

Season 1 Episode 17

Sen. Bob Kerrey

Aired Weekdays 11:30 PM Nov 14, 2005 on Comedy Central
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Episode Summary

Sen. Bob Kerrey
TONIGHT: Stephen Colbert welcomes former Senator Bob Kerrey!

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  • Stephen shows us his love for country music.

    The show opens with a teaser of content from the show, which involves everything from a the bombings in Jordan to country music.

    Stephen gets right into the news about the CMA Awards being hosted in New York City this week. Stephen tries to show some country music videos, but he can't because he doesn't have the rights to air it, so he decides to paraphrase them.

    This all brings us to tonight's "The Word", which is "Testosterone". You can just imagine Stephen's feelings on men vs women.

    Back from commercial, Stephen welcomes tonight's guest, former Senator Bob Kerrey. Their discussion was all about the war in Iraq.

    Back from commercial, Stephen brings up the issue of secret CIA prisons, and then moves into a segment called "Un-American News", which features newspapers from foreign countries.

    Stephen ends the show with a salute to the Internet. Stephen put up portrait he won from eBay, onto one of his shelves.

    Another funny show. The interview didn't feature as much of Stephen's sarcasm, which was a real disappointment. The rest of the show was of the typical great show.moreless

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (1)

  • QUOTES (1)

    • Stephen: …which brings us to tonight's Word: Testosterone. It's the male hormone. It promotes aggression, manliness, and dare I say it, smarts. (Mr. Johnson does the thinking around here) Testosterone is what gives men the stones to get things done, it's right there in the word, testies. (Testos) Well actually testos, which is the word in Greek for tesites. (It isn't, but let's move on) Now, New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd has published a new book "Are Men Necessary," a series of essays defending her inability to get a date. (She started it) Yes Maureen, men are necessary as long as there are spider to be killed and jars of spaghetti sauce to be opened. (I know, you loosened it for me) Men have proven throughout history that we can hack it. (Sack=hack) And women just don't get results. No, you'd rather talk about results, or better yet, talk about your feelings about results. (For God's sake it's 2 A.M.!)

      Case in point, Sajida Mubarak al-Rashawi. This Iraqi woman is a member of Al-Qiada, last week she had one job, to blow herself up. Her husband did all the work. Organized the plan, drove her to Jordan, even strapped the bomb to her. All she had to do was sashay into a wedding reception filled with women and children and pull the trigger. She couldn't handle it. Her husband had no trouble walking into the same sea of innocent people and blowing himself up. This just proves the point I've made for years, woman are incapable of completely abandoning their humanity. Besides, what are you gonna do with those 70 virgins? Paint their toenails? What a waste. Ladies, leave the atrocities to men. (You might hurt yourself)

      And that's the Word.

  • NOTES (0)