The Colbert Report

Season 3 Episode 81

Toby Keith

Aired Weekdays 11:30 PM Jun 18, 2007 on Comedy Central
out of 10
User Rating
9 votes

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Episode Summary

Toby Keith
Tonight Stephen welcomes country music superstar Toby Keith.

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  • Too much ITunes promotion. Too much singing - not enough zinging.

    First of all there was WAY too much Toby Keith. The man seems to embodies every stereotype of redneck trash I can think of. Stephen barely mocked him for his jingoistic uber-patriotism and his vendetta against the Dixie chicks or for his unwaivering support of Bush. He came off as unintelligent, unable to express himself and sullen. He sat slumped in his chair and mumbled incoherent answers.

    Was he just TOO easy of a target so Stephen decided to be nice to him & pretend to like him?

    Then there was the awful twangy singing of his godawfully stupid song. (yes, I listened to the whole thing & tried give it a chance) - - wherein he seems to rant again rich "high maintenance" women who think they're too good for lower class manual laborers.

    I guess this is his version of "keepin' it real" and contributing to the struggle of the proletariat man against his oppressors. Or something..... not sure what was meant by that song... or was it just Sour Grapes from his pre-singer days over some woman who spurned him?

    The other reason I (very uncharaceristically) did not really enjoy the show was there was way too much product placement and disucssion of Itunes. An occasional mention to try to get his episodes or the riotously hilarious White House Correspondant's dinner is fine -- but at some point he crossed over and seemed to just be promoting ITunes.

    And finally, the "WORD" is usually the highlight of any Colbert Report but I just felt that his man-crush on Matthew McConagehy was not very inspired. The comments on the right hand side (which often are so funny I almost cry) basically just mocked Matthew for being a stoner and apparently a ladies man. Overall still love the show and it's a 9.5/10 in general, but let's just pretend this particular episode didn't happen.moreless

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (1)

  • QUOTES (3)

    • Stephen: Matthew's sexy and singular honor brings us to tonight's Word: McConaughey. Look, for all the diehards out there, I know I've used McConaughey as a Word before but it is too important to let go. We all know Matthew McConaughey is the choicest cut of man-flesh in the meat market. (He is Sir Loin) But, more to the point, married guys know he's living out our male fantasies, or mantasies. (Mantasy™ Copyright 2007 Stephen Colbert) Now I'm not just talking about the cheekbones that could cut glass or the rock hard abs that could also cut glass, basically, keep him away from your fine stemware. (And your good bong) But he'll never have to worry about it because you only get fine stemware when you get married and he's never getting married. (Tough to rhyme "Dude" in vows) Why? Because he's untamable! (And they don't make surfing tuxes) Matthew McConaughey was born free! It's a life all men want to live but we can't because we get married and share our lives with a supportive partner who loves us. We can't get high and run in the street, or play the bongos naked. We have responsibilities! (And short-term memory) But McConaughey doesn't have responsibilities, McConaughey has no responsibilities. Evidently he doesn't even have a shirt. (Probably smoked it)

      But by not marrying, he is preserving our marriages, it's very Christ like. He is doing unto 24 year old Brazilian models as we would do unto them. (Matthew 2:69) Of course just like the Lord, there are some people who want to take him down. I'm talking about you, editors of People Magazine! (People Magazine is edited?) With this cover you have made him a target for our nation's hottest bachelorettes. But don't do it Matthew! If you ever entered a committed, loving relationship, who else on People Magazine's list of sexiest bachelors are men supposed to turn to? Zach Braff? Come on! Look at those lonely, puppy dog eyes. I'm surprised he didn't ask that bartender to marry him. So stay strong my brother! Remember, you're not just aimlessly drifting through life by yourself, you're doing it for every man in America.

      And that's the Word.

    • Stephen: I had a great Father's Day with all my kids, that I know of. This is the Colbert Report.

    • Stephen: 68% of Republicans don't believe in evolution, on the other hand, only 5% of monkey's believe in Republicans.

  • NOTES (0)


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