The Cosby Show

Season 1 Episode 1


Aired Thursday 8:00 PM Sep 20, 1984 on NBC



  • Quotes

    • (Life according to Monopoly Money)
      Cliff: So how much does you expect to make a week for 'regular people'?
      Theo: $250
      Cliff: (pointing to the bed) Sit down. I will give you $300 a week. $1200 a month. (Cliff hands the money to Theo)
      Theo: I'll take it!
      Cliff: And I will take $350 for taxes.
      Theo: Whoa!
      Cliff: Oh, yeah. See, the government goes for the regular people first. So, how much does that leave you with?
      Theo: $850.
      Cliff: Okay, now you'll need an apartment because you are NOT living here. Now an apartment in Manhattan will run you at least $400 a month.
      Theo: I'll live in New Jersey. (Theo takes back $200)
      Cliff: Now you'll need a car. (Cliff takes $300)
      Theo: I'll drive a motorbike. (Theo takes back $100)
      Cliff: You're gonna need a helmet. (Cliff takes $50) Now figure $100 a month for clothes and shoes.
      Theo: Figure $200. I wanna look GOOD.
      Cliff: So, how much does that leave you with?
      Theo: $200. So, no problem.
      Cliff: Cliff: There IS a problem! You haven't EATEN yet! (Cliff takes $100)
      Theo: I can get by on bologna and cereal. (Theo takes back his $100) So I've got everything under control PLUS $200 left for the month.
      Cliff: You plan to have a girlfriend?
      Theo: For sure.
      (Cliff takes the remaining $200)
      Cliff: (pointing at Theo's empty hand): Regular people.

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