The Drew Carey Show

Season 3 Episode 1

Drew vs. Billboard

Aired Wednesday 9:00 PM Sep 23, 1997 on ABC
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Episode Summary

Drew vs. Billboard
Drew worries that his lack of physical fitness is holding him back after Wick chooses a fit young man named Smith to represent the store at a conference in Hawaii. A man at the Warsaw overhears Drew lamenting his situation. He claims to have lost a lot of weight through a pill that is ingested with beer. He offers to give Drew a free bottle of the pills if he poses for some photos for a "before and after" campaign. A few days later, Drew is horrified to see a shirtless photo of himself on a billboard. He becomes the laughingstock of the city, and cannot force Morgan to remove the billboard because he signed a contract. Wick warns that he is embarrassing the store and may be moved to a position that does not require contact with the public. Drew and the gang climb on the billboard at night to tear it down. Morgan shows up to stop them, thanks to a warning from Mimi, but they staple him to the billboard and pull his pants down. Morgan warns that Drew has a suspicious mole. Drew goes to a doctor and learns that he is in good condition. Smith suddenly drops dead of a heart attack at the conference, and Wick sends Drew to Hawaii to retrieve the body. Drew has fun by posing for photos with the corpse in various airports. Meanwhile, Lewis fears that a DrugCo shampoo is causing his head to grow bigger.moreless

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Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (0)

  • QUOTES (10)

    • Kate: So, Mr. Wick, I hope this tragedy has proved to you that people who appear physically fit aren't necessarily the best ones for the job.
      Mr. Wick: But I like strong, healthy-looking people. Ugly people make me sad.

    • Mr. Wick: Look, I know about the billboard and I'm afraid you're going to have to get it down.
      Drew: I can't take it down. I called the owner of Vitabeer. He says there's nothing I can do. I signed a release, and I have no, uh, recourse.
      Mr. Wick: Well, I have a bigger problem. When people picture a Winfred-Louder employee, we'd like them to think of someone who might be around for the next ten years.
      Drew: Sir, that smacks of looks-ism.
      Mr. Wick: Don't talk to me about looks-ism. How many times have I not been taken seriously because I'm too damn good looking.
      Drew: (after a pause) Is this a riddle, sir?

    • Mr. Wick: Kate, much like tropical fish, I believe he'd grow to the size of his environment. The only reason he's not bigger is because his cubicle isn't bigger.

    • (About his topless photoshoot)
      Drew: I don't have to climb on a horse do I? Because I have allergies.

    • (After arguing with Mr. Wick)
      Drew: Hey Kate, in the broadest sense of the term, I just had sex.

    • Drew: Hey! I get to drag a dead body through three airports. Got to get some film.

    • (A piece of the billboard is cut away to reveal a scene with pigs and cows.)
      Lewis: Hey, Drew! It's just like your REAL stomach!

    • Oswald: (referring to "The Beer Diet") Yeah, I got one too. You drink, you pass out, you don't eat for two days!

    • Mimi: MR. WICK! Drew's too fat to do his job!

    • Oswald (to Drew): Remember that teacher who said you'd never get famous being fat and dumb? Looks like you got a call to make!

  • NOTES (0)


    • Drew: You know, holding the horn like that, you kinda look like the Partridge Family bus.

      The Partridge Family was a TV show from the 1970's about a singing family who traveled around in a converted school bus. The paint job on the bus resembled a Mondrian painting, as does Mimi's dress in this episode.

    • Mimi: I call it Ice Chapig

      That line is a reference to the Ice Chapades.

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