The Facts Of Life Season 5 Episode 1

Raymond: Mother, just because I'm an accountant and dependable and brush my teeth three times a day does not mean I lack imagination.

Raymond: Mom, I've got something to tell you. Sit down.
Mrs. Garrett: Sit down? You never give me news I have to sit down for. That's your brother's department.

(In Blair's room)
Jo: Well as of tonight I officially moved out of my dorm.
Blair: Where are you going to live?
(Jo drops her suitcase and sleeping bag)
Blair: You can't live in my room!
Jo: No no no, I can't live in my room. Every night after curfew I'll sneak in the window, and every morning before breakfast I'll sneak out the window.
Blair: You mean you'll stow away in my room like a rat on a ship?
Jo: Sure. No one will know I'm here.
Blair: I'll know! This is a single room! There's not enough oxygen in here for two people!
Jo: We'll get a plant.

Natalie: The halls crawl with men?
Jo: Natalie, don't drool.
Blair: Come on, I'll show you around campus.
Natalie: Couldn't we just crawl the halls awhile?

(Guy, dressed only in a towel, walks in looking for his book)
Guy: (To Natalie and Tootie) Have either of you seen my Basic Anatomy?

Tootie: I'll take lots of pictures.
Natalie: Tootie, we are not going on a field trip to the zoo. We're entering a new world of higher learning, intellectual pursuits...
Tootie: ...Co-ed dorms.
Natalie: (hands her back her camera) Be discreet.