The Golden Girls

Season 1 Episode 3

Rose the Prude

Aired Unknown Sep 28, 1985 on NBC

Episode Recap

The episode opens with Sophia and Dorothy in the middle of a game of gin rummy. Sophia tells Dorothy to discard one of her cards, commenting that she's 80 and would like to live long enough to see the next hand. Dorothy remarks she doesn't have to, and reveals that she got gin. Sophia tells Dorothy she's taking advantage of her because she's on blood pressure medication. Dorothy tells her that if the prescription affects her she should change the dosage. Sophia remarks that she likes being whacked out. Blanche comes onto the patio telling everyone that she has a problem. She says that her date's brother is in town, and if she can't find a date for him, then the whole evening with her date will be cancelled. She asks if someone will go out with him. Sophia offers, but Blanche tells her she was asking the question more towards Dorothy. Dorothy says that she's busy. Blanche complains that they're just playing cards. Dorothy tells her that they're not just playing cards, they're playing gin rummy. Sophia remarks that in 30 years, Dorothy hasn't beaten her in the game once. Dorothy says that that is going to change tonight. Sophia jokes that she's so scared her dentures are chattering. Rose comes onto the patio, and Blanche asks her if she would be available to go on a date with her date's brother. Rose tells her that she's not really interested in dating anymore. Blanche comments that that is not true, or Rose would let her hair go natural. Rose says that her problem was that she was spoiled because of her long marriage with Charlie. Dorothy tells her that it's only a dinner, and that it doesn't have to turn into a long term relationship. Blanche begs her saying that if she doesn't go then she can't go. Rose says that she's going to regret this and that she is going to have a horrible time, but she agrees to go. Blanche goes to call the men. Dorothy asks Rose why she looks so depressed. Rose says that she's tired of going out not having fun, and she says all the men act old. She recounts her last date with man had her listening for two hours about his prostate problem. She says she's lived in Minnesota for 51 years, and never even heard of a prostate. Dorothy jokes they don't have them there because it's too cold. Rose tells Dorothy she should go on the date because she would at least have fun. Dorothy says nothing could be more fun than beating Sophia at gin rummy. Just then, Sophia lays gin on the table.

Later that evening, Blanche comes home from her date. In the kitchen, Sophia says gin, and we hear a plate smash onto the floor. Dorothy storms out of the kitchen and slumps into the chair. Blanche asks Dorothy if everything's okay. Sophia then comes out of the kitchen with a wad of cash in her hand. Blanche doesn't understand why Dorothy plays cards with Sophia since it just makes her crazy. Dorothy agrees with Blanche, and tells Sophia that she's not playing cards with her anymore. Sophia is convinced that she's going to be because Dorothy's biggest weakness is her competitiveness. She then comments that Dorothy's ears are actually her worst feature. Dorothy asks Blanche if she believes that. Blanche says that she always felt Dorothy's feet were her worst feature. Blanche tells Dorothy she's going to bed, but Dorothy stops her and asks how the date went. Blanche says it was a complete disaster. Dorothy asks if Rose and her date didn't get along. Blanche says that Rose and her date got along just fine, but her date was the bad one. She comments that next time she's going to date both brothers before she gives one away to someone. Rose walks in, and Dorothy comments that she heard Rose had a great time on her date. Rose says it was great, and she hasn't laughed like that since she was a teenager. Rose says that they ran a toll booth. Rose says that Arnie did it just because it was there. Rose says that Arnie is the most outrageous, unpredictable man she's ever met. Blanche remarks that her date was on a low sodium diet. Rose says she can't remember the last time she had this much fun, and says that her and Arnie are going back to the dancing club tomorrow. Blanche says that her date claimed that dancing made his ankles swell. Dorothy is glad that Rose had a good time on her date. Rose goes to bed, but Blanche is still upset that she had a bad time on her date. Dorothy tells Blanche to be happy for Rose because Blanche has at least been on dates with a lot of interesting men before. Blanche asks her to name one. Dorothy asks about the coach from the Miami Dolphins she dated. Blanche admits that night was pretty fun with the training room, the pool, and adhesive tape. Blanche tells her to name another one. Dorothy tells Blanche to take a cold shower.

The next day, Blanche comes out of the kitchen and asks Dorothy if she can open a can of macadamia nuts for her. Blanche says that she doesn't want to try and open it because she doesn't want to damage her nails. Dorothy asks if her nails are claws then. Blanche thought she wouldn't mind since she works with her hands all day. Dorothy says she's a teacher, not a woman that shucks oysters. Sophia comes out of the bedroom, and tells Dorothy and Blanche that she's going next door to attend a club. Blanche remarks that she didn't know Sophia was in a club. Sophia says that a bunch of women get together and send pictures to Willard Scott saying that they are 100. Dorothy thinks that is ridiculous. Sophia asks if she has a better way of getting on The Today Show. When she opens the door, Rose and Arnie are kissing outside. Sophia asks Rose to take it elsewhere saying that this isn't the French Quarters. Arnie asks if she'll think about next week, and Rose says that she will. Blanche remarks that Rose and Arnie are getting pretty serious. Rose seems upset, and storms out to the patio. Dorothy and Blanche follow her outside, and ask if she'll be alright. Rose insists that she will be alright. Blanche asks if this is about Arnie. Dorothy jokes that Rose is upset because they keep changing the taste of Coke. Rose tells them that Arnie wants her to go on a cruise with him to the Bahamas. Blanche asks if she's upset because Arnie's making her pay to go. Dorothy says that she's upset because they're going to be alone in the middle of the ocean on a boat. She says she's worried Arnie might ask her for sex. Rose says that she hasn't slept with a man since Charlie passed away. Blanche doesn't believe her. Rose insists that she's telling the truth when she said that Charlie was her only lover. Blanche still can't believe Rose went that long without sex. Dorothy tells Blanche to knock it off, adding that not everyone is known by the navy as a friendly port. Rose says that when Charlie passed away, she felt that part of her life was over, and never gave it a second thought. Dorothy asks if she was thinking about it now. Rose nods her head. Dorothy tells her that she should go on the cruise, and if the situation is right, she'll know it. Rose still isn't sure that she's ready. Dorothy tells her that sometimes taking a chance can result in a good or bad outcome, but that if she doesn't take a chance, then nothing will happen. Rose agrees to go on the cruise. Rose says she needs to look on her closet, and doesn't know what she will wear. Blanche recommends a lifejacket and a smile.

On the boat, Rose gets ready for bed, wondering if she's really ready for this to happen. She lies down on the bed, and she is startled by Arnie. Arnie apologizes for startling her. Dorothy remarks that she likes his bathrobe, and he tells her that his kids gave it to him for Father's Day. Rose wishes that she had the knack for picking out unusual gifts. Rose asks if its terrycloth and Arnie believes that it is. Arnie tells her that it's time for bed. Rose says she isn't sure she's ready for bed. Arnie says that he isn't either, and asks if she likes dancing. Rose says she'd love to, and would like to go back out to the ballroom. Arnie says he has a radio, and he gets it out and turns it on. The music comes on, and Rose remarks that it's a Glenn Miller song. As they dance, Rose tells Arnie that she met Charlie at a Glenn Miller concert. She says that it wasn't actually Glenn Miller, but a band that impersonated them. She says their motto was that if they close their eyes that they'll believe it actually was Glenn Miller, but that no matter what you always knew it was the other band. Arnie remarks that Rose is one of a kind. Rose says that Charlie used to say that. She tells Arnie that she reminds him of Charlie a lot by the way he laughs and dances. Arnie tells her that he's not Charlie, and if she likes him, then it has to be for who he is, not who he reminds her of. Rose tells Arnie that she does like him. Arnie says that he likes her. They begin to kiss, but Rose breaks away and runs out of the room. Arnie sits down on the bed stunned and hurt.

At the house, Dorothy and Blanche are both still up. Blanche goes to get some tea when Sophia walks in. She tells Blanche to be careful because there's a specimen in the refrigerator. Blanche is confused. Dorothy wonders how Rose is doing right now. Sophia notes that she means if Rose is doing it right now. Dorothy says that she just worries about whether they pushed her into something she wasn't ready for. Blanche notes she doesn't understand how Rose had been able to stay abstinent for all the years before she married Charlie. Dorothy asks how long Blanche waited after George died. Sophia jokes it was when the paramedics came. Blanche admits it was during the funeral when the priest was performing the service, she knew that he wanted her. Blanche says that when he was up on the pulpit, he would talk about sin and would look straight at her. She admits that after his wife died, there was no stopping the two from happening. Blanche says that it took him 10 minutes, wore his watch in his socks, and Blanche claims she hasn't seen him since. Sophia admits that Sal never even took off his pants. Blanche asks who Dorothy was with after Stan. Sophia says it was her divorce lawyer. Dorothy asks how she knew that. Sophia says most people do that in a divorce. Dorothy says that when she got a divorce, she gained a lot of weight, and because of her age, she states that it looked like somebody had deflated the air out of her face. Dorothy suggests that she look in the mirror one day while bending over. Blanche gets up and gets a mirror out. She insists that there won't be a change, but one look shocks the living daylights out of her. Blanche asks why she never told her that before. Dorothy tells her that lying on her back will make it look like she got a facelift. Blanche admits she needs to start meeting men lying down. Sophia thought she did. Dorothy adds that the chest also falls back, but it also falls to the side.

Back on the boat, Arnie comes back to find Rose is still locked in the bathroom. Arnie tells her that there is another cabin open on the boat, and that he'll move to it if it'll make her feel better. He insists he needs in the restroom. Rose opens the door, but says that she doesn't want him to see her eyes because of all the crying she's done. Arnie tells her that she could never look terrible to him. Rose apologizes for last night. Arnie says that it was an awkward situation. Rose says that she thought she could go through with it, but in the end she just couldn't bring herself to do it. She admits that it would have been the first time since her husband died. Arnie tells her that he must have been something special if she's been abstinent for the last 15 years. Rose says that she would feel like she was unfaithful if she slept with someone else. Arnie admits that he felt the same way after his wife died, but he admits it didn't stop him. Rose asks if he makes love, and then feels guilty about it. Arnie says that he feels lousy about it, but otherwise he feels terrific. Arnie says that must be the difference between men and women. Arnie says that he adored his wife, and he never slept with another woman. He says that she died when a drunken man in a Chevy wrecked into her car. He says he was a zombie for the first year. But one day, his daughter told him that she would be ashamed to see him this way, and would wonder who he would be saving himself for since she's dead. He says that convinced her, and wonders what Charlie would say. Rose says that he would say the same thing his wife said. Arnie tells her that his wife didn't really say that. Rose says that she worries that he might kill him. Arnie doesn't understand what she's talking about. Rose admits that she hasn't told anyone this, but that Charlie died while he was making love to her, and she's afraid that if they make love, it might kill him. Arnie admits that if she hasn't made love in 15 years, it just might. Arnie tells Rose not to worry about it, and says that he has a good heart, but that it's her decision. He says he just likes being with her. He says that he's going to pack his stuff, but Rose tells him to sit down. She asks if he'll hold her, and Arnie complies with her wish.

At the house, Sophia sees Dorothy reading in the living room. She takes a deck of cards, and starts shuffling with them. Dorothy tells her to go away. Sophia tells her that she'll start her off with 25 points if she plays. Dorothy tells her that she's not going to play cards with her. Sophia asks why she won't. Dorothy says it's because Sophia's the only one that ends up having any fun. Sophia admits that the cards bore her. It's the talking that she likes. She says that she and Dorothy have had some of their best conversations during a game of cards. She feels that they open up more then. She tells her that Aunt Jean was the same way, and admitted to Sophia that she once swam naked in a pool with a man. Dorothy says she never told her that, but Sophia says she would've gotten around to it if they would have been playing cards. Blanche tells everyone that Rose's taxi is pulling into the driveway. Dorothy wonders if Rose had fun, and Sophia adds that she did if she and Arnie made love. Sophia thinks she did, while Blanche thinks she got cold feet. Dorothy tells both of them that if Rose wants to tell them about it, then they'll listen, but they're not going to bug her to admit anything that she doesn't want to. Rose comes in the door, and immediately Sophia pops the question. Rose doesn't comprehend, but Blanche interjects and asks her to talk about the trip. Rose says the food was great, weather was great, and the activities were great. Dorothy then pops the question and asks if Rose and Arnie made love. Rose tells them that some women don't kiss and tell. Blanche says that's the fun about it, and that most of her men were just about the stories. Rose says that she's going to unpack. Dorothy says that she doesn't have to tell them out front, but that they'll know that if she comes back out to them then they'll know that she made love to Arnie. Rose leaves, and for a moment doesn't come back, but then comes out and says that it did happen. She says it was wonderful. The girls are happy for her, and Rose thanks Blanche and Dorothy for pushing her to go. Rose says that Arnie taught her that she can still care about a man without feeling guilty about it. She says that it feels like one part of her life is over, but that another part has begun. Rose says she has to go unpack now. Blanche offers to help, and then tells the other two that she'll get the details about it. Dorothy asks if Sophia wants to play gin rummy, and Sophia says yes. She tells Dorothy that she got a call from an old friend today, and that she got married to a man that Dorothy could have had. Dorothy notes that she did have her husband, and that's why she didn't want him. Sophia asks for her to elaborate, but Dorothy says that she wants to hear the story about her Aunt Jean swimming in the pool naked. Sophia starts to tell the story, and they continue playing


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