The Hard Times of RJ Berger

Season 1 Episode 5

The Rebound

Aired Sunday 11:00 PM Jul 05, 2010 on MTV - Music Television
out of 10
User Rating
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Episode Summary


RJ thinks his luck may finally be in, when Jenny Swanson breaks up with her boyfriend, after finding red lingerie in his locker. Meanwhile, Max forces RJ to help prove to Jenny that he didn't cheat.

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    Kristopher Higgins

    Kristopher Higgins


    Guest Star

    Najarra Townsend

    Najarra Townsend


    Guest Star

    Chris Warren, Jr.

    Chris Warren, Jr.


    Guest Star

    Marlon Young

    Marlon Young

    Coach Jeriba Sinclair

    Recurring Role

    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (9)

      • (RJ's closing monologue.)
        RJ Berger: My name is RJ Berger, and sometimes the truth hurts.

      • (Explaining why he didn't want to get Jenny by lying.)
        RJ Berger: Miles, I want her more than anything in the world. But... Not the way I was going to get it tonight...
        Miles: Man, they are REALLY going at it... (Referring to Max and Jenny making out on the basketball court.) I mean, they do NOT care that everyone here is watching. I mean, you gotta wonder at this point, if he's just going to poke her right there on the court. Hey, on the bright side... He might be too busy with Jenny to whip your ass for awhile...
        RJ Berger: I could use a break.

      • Miles: Of all the rebounds Jenny could have chosen, she picked you to go out with Friday night. Dude, you are going to cram that nuclear sub of yours into her pink harbor. You're gonna crash that double decker bus into her roundabout. You are gonna land that jumbo blimp of yours onto her blonde astroturf...
        RJ Berger: Dude!!!

      • (Pulling out a crumpled piece of paper, revealing the poem he wrote for RJ to read to Jenny.)
        Miles: Dude, chicks go crazy for rhymes. Why do you think rappers get so much panini? Jenny, I think you're really neat. And unlike Max, I'd never cheat. So let's use that pain and get our nut. Please let me stick in in your ample little... (Get's abruptly cut off by RJ.)
        RJ Berger: MILES!!!

      • (While arguing with Miles over whether or not he has shot with Jenny.)
        RJ Berger: It's not gonna happen, Miles, ok!? I have a better chance of lightning striking my balls than I do of getting anywhere near that beautiful girl.
        Miles: Well, looks like Ben Franklin just tied a kite to your nuts. (He says as he nods towards Jenny, who is approaching them.)

      • (While talking to the coach about Jenny's break up with Max, and RJ's hope of having a chance with her.)
        Coach Sinclair: Berger, as your guidance councilor, I feel it's my duty to tell you this. I've got a better chance of gettin' up in Beyonce's guts, than you got at gettin' with that piece of A double S.
        RJ Berger: I guess you're right...
        Coach Sinclair: Now don't get all hang dog on me. I suppose everybody's got a one in a million shot at his dream comin' true. You know what my dream is? (Holds up a lottery ticket.) Turnin' $2 into $7,000. (Scratches off the ticket.) I don't believe it...
        RJ Berger: What, you won?!
        Coach Sinclair: No, I lost. Just like I lose everyday. And that Berger, is life. You want dreams, take a nap. There... (Slaps the lottery ticket, which says LOSER on it, in front of RJ.) Consider yourself guidanced.

      • RJ Berger: I mean,I just, I don't understand, I mean... Who would ever cheat on Jenny Swanson?
        Miles: Show me a hot chick, and I'll show you a dude who's sick of gettin' tuggers from her.

      • Miles:(Approaching RJ in a crowd of onlookers.)Dude, what are you staring at? Did Kevin Stern take a crap in the hallway again?
        RJ Berger: No dude, I think Max Owens really blew it this time. Aww, man, I wish I could read lips!
        Miles: Pfft! Dude, reading lips is a myth created by deaf people.

      • (RJ's opening monologue after he finds out that Jenny is breaking up with Max.)
        RJ Berger: My name is RJ Berger, and I just updated my status to erect.

    • NOTES (5)

    • ALLUSIONS (0)