Note: commercials are from a repeat broadcast.
--Show opens with short routine by Rowan and Martin
Commercials: (1) Mrs. Paul's Fried Onion Rings (people using onion rings as jewelry and currency); (2) Mrs. Paul's Sandwich Thins
--Dan Rowan and Dick Martin (co-hosts) - Rowan talks about his plans to do a musical number with the orchestra, he then tries to get Martin to sing a few songs.
--Ron Gaylord & Burt Holiday (comedy team) - one sings "The Impossible Dream" while they both tells jokes about movies starring politicians and a Southern coach commenting on a a black athlete.
--Dick Martin introduces Betty Walker "and her magic telephone"
--Betty Walker telephone monologue #1 - she plays a woman who keeps yelling at her kids while talking on the telephone.
Commercials: (1) Bayer Aspirin; (2) Haley's M-O Laxative
--Irwin C. Watson (stand-up comedian) - topics include integrating the suburbs, the back-to-Africa movement, and his neighbors complaining about his trained orangutan.
--Ron Gaylord & Burt Holiday sketch - a gangster threatens a gas station attendant.
Commercials for Platex bras and girdles
--Betty Walker telephone monologue #2.
--Gene Sheldon (pantomime comedian) - plays "I'm Looking Over A Four-Leaf Clover" on the banjo.
--Simmy Bow (double-talking comedian) tells Dan Rowan about all the books he's written and the weird topics of his books.
--Gaylord & Holiday comedy routine - a gunfighter threatens a Sheriff.
Station ID break
Commercials: (1) Efferdent denture tablets; (2) Rolaids (for heartburn and acid)
--Dan Rowan and Dick Martin talk about the upcomming Hollywood Palace cast party. The team practices doing charades.
--Betty Walker telephone monologue #3 - gossips about a relative
--Ron Gaylord & Burt Holiday (comedy team) - do a skit about a hijacker wanting to go to Cuba. The pilot talks the hijacker into going to Hollywood and becoming a star.
Commercial: Raleigh Cigarettes (couple riding on Merry-Go-Round) and Bel-Air cigarettes.
--Dan Rowan tries to get Dick Martin to "stand on his mark."
--Betty Walker telephone monologue #4 - gossips about a woman with 2 dogs.
--Jackie Gayle (stand-up comedian) - jokes about elderly people; compares Los Angeles cops with traffic cops in other parts of the US; and does a rock 'n' roll National Anthem for young people.
Commercial: Texaco ad with Jack Benny (gas station attendants try to get Jack Benny to "fill up" instead of asking for just one gallon).
--Dick Martin introduces a fashion show. Dick Martin introduces the first model, a bikini-clad woman he claims is wearing "authentic 'Mary Poppins" attire." Dan Rowan abruptly stops the fashion show.
Public Service ad about South America: men exchanging ties.