Honey, I Beat the Kids

Season 2, Episode 3, Aired
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Episode Summary

Darryl gives Michael a spanking for misbehaving, but it's Darryl who learns a lesson about raising children, and that the way he grew up is not necessarily the best way.
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  • Michael earns a spanking and he and the family have conflicted feelings about it.

    10
    "Perfect"
    By dayo1977, Nov 10, 2005 Report Abuse
    I loved this episode precisely because Darryl, although realizing that he should be sensitive to Michael, does not have second thoughts and come to regret disciplining him. My only complaint when it aired was that apparently Darryl doesn't know some white folks still believe in spanking too! Some lessons kids need to learn over mom or dad's lap.

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  • Quotes

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    • Darryl: They nothin' but a bunch of new-age, tree-huggin', whale watchin', tofu-suckin... well, that's all I got right now. Darryl: ...and that's why each and every prison cell has its own drain. Michael: Dad, I'm ten. I'm practically a man. Back in Africa, I'd have a hut and four wives already. Edit
    • Michael: I know, I know, before you even say it, it's gonna hurt you more than it hurts me. Darryl: Well, not if I do it right. Edit
    • Dave: Hey, Darryl, I'd spank the kid, but I'm too damn big. Burped him, once, nearly stopped his heart. Darryl: Child psychologists? You know, if they were any good, they'd be workin' with adults. Edit

  • Allusions

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    • Episode Title: "Honey, I Beat the Kids" This is a spoof to a comedy movie from 1989, "Honey, I Shrunk the Kids." Edit

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