The Musketeers Season 1 Episode 2

Porthos: Well, I think he can do it. And I'm a pretty good judge of character.
Aramis: You're a terrible judge of character, especially when you're sober.

Porthos: You've heard about D'Artagnan? You know, these stories can be greatly exaggerated.
Constance: Really?
Porthos: Mm.
Constance: I was told you led him into danger and then abandoned him.
Porthos: That one's about right.

Aramis: (rubs his cheekbone after being slapped) God, I love that in a woman.
Porthos: What? Passion?
Aramis: [grinning] Violence.

Porthos: The way I look at it, you saved her life, so she's probably grateful.
Aramis: But we did put her in danger in the first place, so she might want to see us whipped.
Porthos: I hadn't thought of that. You've upset me now.

Constance: (after D'Artagnan kisses her as a ruse) Oh! You're making a habit of this.
D'Artagnan: Believe me, I wouldn't unless I had to.
Constance: That's flattering. And no tongues.

Constance: If you've heard of anyone wanting a room, I'd be glad to know. My husband needs the money. It's not easy to find decent lodgers. Every time one of them gets themselves killed in a duel, or thrown in the Chatelet or murdered in some intrigue or other, it's a tremendous inconvenience. Of course, it's less cooking and cleaning. In fact, I wish my lodgers would die more often, so I could have an easier life.

Suzette: I've never been this close to a Musketeer with my clothes on. I must be in trouble.

Suzette: Has anyone ever told you you've got lovely eyes?
Aramis: The Captain mentioned it only this morning.
Athos: If you don't tell us the truth, we could have you whipped.
Suzette: It's usually the other way round with you boys, but if the money's right...

Richelieu: Your father was assassinated, it's simply a matter of common sense to stay away!
King Louis: Common sense is for commoners, not for kings!

D'Artagnan: You know mutton is the one that goes "baa" and has wool on it?

Aramis: I dont like this. I've never been unpopular before.
Porthos: Try trading places with me.
Aramis: But you're used to it. I'm more the romantic hero type.