(going to give Fran a Cortizone shot for her rash)
Doctor: I'll just give it to you in your rear, because it hurts a lot less in a big, fleshy area.
Fran: I'm guessing you got a 'D' in bedside manner, huh, Frankie?
Nurse: Dr. Cresetelli will be with you in a few minutes.
Fran: Cresetelli?!?! This is a matter of life and death! I need a Glickman or a Schwartz.
Fran: How did you ever become a doctor? You couldn't even play Operation.
Doctor: Just calm down. Real people are a lot bigger than that little cardboard guy.
(Sylvia notices a mark on Fran's neck, which Sylvia mistakenly thinks is a hickey)
Fran: (looking the mark on her neck in the mirror in horror) What is that?
Sylvia: Enough already. You don't have to hide. You can have a hickey at your age. You can have osteoporosis at your age.
Fran: (looking down her own blouse in shock) Oh my God, it goes all the way down my body.
Sylvia: (excitedly, still thinking it's a hickey) Mazel Tov, darling!
Grace: Fran, I've been wearing a training bra for about three months now, and what exactly is that it trains them to do?
Fran: You know, honey, you really can't train 'em. Eventually, they'll just get older and go their separate ways.
Sylvia: Funny you should bring this up. Since I started my diet, I went down an entire cup size.
Fran: What cup size did you go down to, Ma? Stanley?
Fran: Michael. Michael. Would you mind? I am your biggest fan. Would you please autograph this for me? Uh, just do it on my back. Just do it on my back. And press hard, because, you know, that ball point doesn't work so good. Yeah. "To Fran". To the left. To the left. To the left. "My biggest fan". Whoo. To the right. To the right. To the right. To the right. Okay. Okay. Yeah. "I am very, very, very, very...".
Maxwell: Uh, Miss Fine...
Fran: Oh. Oh. Okay. Alright. Thank you. Thank you so much. That was really good, Michael. Really good.
Michael: Yeah. Well, I'm gonna go now.
Michael: This is... weird.
C.C.: Sage?! I am allergic to sage!
Niles: Oh, really? I thought time was your enemy.
Sylvia: Doctor, I have an enlarged daughter! Do something!
This episode was completely different from Fran Drescher's original idea for it. The first draft of the script had Fran Fine being driven crazy by hemorrhoids. The producers said no way and rewrote the entire episode. The original idea also included a scene with Fran hopping into a large water fountain at the Michael Bolton party to cool her burning bottom. From Fran Drescher's own head.
Michael Bolton sings Nessum Dorma, which is an aria from Puccini's opera "Turandot".