The New Adventures of Old Christine

Season 3 Episode 8

Burning Down the House (1)

Aired Wednesday 8:00 PM Mar 17, 2008 on CBS



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Christine: OK, my turn. (reaches in to lost and found box for free stuff). Oh... I just love this. It's like Christmas without all of the giving (voice trails off) and the Jesus...

    • Christine: You are gonna smoke reefer?
      Barb: Yeah, why not? It's just like a glass of wine.
      Christine: Oh, Barb, it is not. When was the last time you ever heard of somebody getting addicted to wine?
      Barb: Talk to the guys who collect your recycling.

    • Christine: I'm glad we did this, even without the drugs. I'm starting to think drugs aren't the answer.
      Tom: Well, not the whole answer.

    • Richard: What are you guys doing out here?
      Christine: Nothing, we're just hanging out.
      Barb: We're trying to get stoned. Got any weed?

    • Christine: I love eating in a car. It's like camping.
      Tom: Well, you're really good at it. I mean, your balance is remarkable, and using the soda lid as a ketchup reservoir, that's just—that's ingenious.
      Christine: I developed this system when Ritchie was born because he wouldn't sleep unless he was in a moving car, and that's the only way I could eat. I got so good at it, I could drive, eat a three-course meal, and nurse all at the same time.
      Tom: I don't know why that's sexy, but it is.
      Christine: Yeah, and to this day if somebody says, "can I take your order?", I lactate a little.
      Tom: Slightly less sexy, but still.

    • Barb: You know Pete and I split up six months ago, and I haven't gone out on a date yet.
      Matthew: Why haven't you?
      Barb: Because I'm scared. I've only been with one man. I don't know what it's going to be like.
      Matthew: Well, Pete was 6'5" with a size 14 shoe, so you might wanna start by lowering your expectations.

    • Richard: I know for a fact you were with Mikey Pines.
      Barb: I was with him; he wasn't with me.
      Matthew: I'm scared to know what that means.

    • Matthew: C'mon, Barb, you must have got around.
      Barb: Why do you think that?
      Matthew: I don't know. The way you look and act and drink, and your hair seems slutty.

    • Matthew: Why do you think I do drugs? (Christine scoffs and gestures at him) What?
      Christine: Your hair, the robe, your life.

    • Christine: Do you have any (whispers) grass?
      Matthew: I don't think anyone's had any grass since 1972. Were you watching Starsky and Hutch again?

    • Richard: I don't believe this!
      Barb: What?
      Richard: Matthew's not on drugs, you're not easy, Christine has llama food in her garage, what the hell is going on?

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • When Christie keeps talking 'cool', Richard finally refers to her as "Fonzie", comparing her to Henry Winkler's iconic ultra-cool character from Happy Days.