The New Normal Season 1 Episode 1

Jane: (To Shania) So are you thinking about joining the Brownies this year? Did I ever tell you that I set my troops record for cookie sales? In spite of that Mindy Goldfarb trying to Jew down my customers.
Shania: Nana you're a biggot. I'm unfriending you right now.
Jane: I am extremely tollerant to all peoples. When they opened that Chipoltle here I was the first of my friends to go, and that is Spanish food.
Shania: Still unfriended.

Jane: Would you look at that, just strutting down the middle of Buckeye road in broad daylight, proud as gay peacocks.
Shania: Why shouldn't they be Nana?
Jane: Don't call me that, I don't look old enough be a Grandmother.
Shania: Great-Grandmother.
Jane: I happen to love the gays, I could never get my hair to look this good without them.
Goldie: Seems like they love each other that's all.
Jane: And now with the P.D.A. Those ass campers have some nerve.
Goldie: Nanna, those are lesbians.
Jane: Those are ugly men.

Bryan: (Recording a video for his and David's unborn child) Hi, it's me, Byan Collins. But you won't know me as that, you will know me as dad. Maybe even daddy. Oh god I think I'd just die if you call me daddy. (chokes up) This video is to show you. How desperately you are wanted. And how much we love you. You're our baby. We ae just so excited to meet you.