The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency Season 1 Episode 5

Mma Ramotswe: Have you heard the expression 'never judge a book by its cover'?
Mma Makutsi: Mmm, luckily, that does not apply to pretty girls.

JLB Matekoni: If a man has no wife, if a man has no chance of a wife? If the woman a man wants for his wife will not look at him twice, then what?
Old Angler: Then the river is a fine companion.

Mma Ramotswe: (talking to Rose about Rra Matekoni) Just because we sometimes break bread together does not mean we must do it for ever and ever.

(talking about the rival detective, Cephas Buthelezi)
Mma Makutsi: You did not find him full of bluster and hot air?
BK: He blows his own trumpet but he has a trumpet to blow.

Guy in Canteen: Motlamedi is the most beautiful girl in Gabarone.
Mma Makutsi: And what about your integrity?
Motlamedi Matluli: Oh, it looks very good in a swimsuit.

Mma Ramotswe: Are you alright?
BK: Is there anything peculiar about a hairdresser with no hair, Mma?
Mma Ramotswe: The less you have the more you care about other people's.

Mma Ramotswe: It is a contest of integrity, not just beauty.
Motlamedi Matluli: Integrity? Men with their wives in the big houses, their girlfriends in the small houses, and their morals gone missing somewhere in between?
Mma Ramotswe: Not all men are like that.
Motlamedi Matluli: Perhaps you know some which I do not.

Nandira Patel: You've got it all mapped out for me. You are the owner of my life, not me.
Mr. Patel: I want the best for you. I know what the world is like. You don't.
Nandira Patel: You don't know my world.