The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency Season 1 Episode 2

Mma Ramotswe: Not a big disguise. I just don't want to be identified.
BK: Well, can't do anything about your distinctive figure.
Mma Ramotswe: There is nothing distinctive about my figure.

JLB Matekoni: You shouldn't have wasted your money on the aftershave. I'm quite happy smelling of Sunlight soap.
Fanwell: But Boss, women prefer smart-smelling men.
Charlie: And that is the path to heavenly pleasure!

Charlie: In America, a scientist proved that a man thinks about sex every seven seconds.
JLB Matekoni: That can't be true. How did he measure that? Did he attach radio wires to people's heads?
Charlie: (giggles) Maybe he attached them to... (looks down at his crotch)
Fanwell: Somewhere else. (laughs)

JLB Matekoni: The people who run the ivory trade are more dangerous than any mamba. If threatened, they'll strike to kill. A woman in their world is like a fragile ship on a stormy sea, or an antelope in a desert full of lions.
Mma Ramotswe: It's been a very long time since someone compared me to an antelope.

BK: Sugar babes, you are tired and worried and paranoid. Your brain has been under the dryer for too long. Relax. After that cup of tea, you'll feel better.
Mma Makutsi: I am having a crisis, you silly man! And it will not be solved by a cup of tea.