The O.C. Season 3 Episode 22

Marissa: So, I know the whole "friendship" thing didn't really work out in Newport, but—
Ryan: That was Newport, you know. Everything feels different here. I'm willing to try.
Marissa: Hm. Well I don't know. You know, 'cause if I was in your circle of friends I might accidentally let it slip that you used to do musicals.
Ryan: I have enough dirt on you to last the next four years. So bring it on.
Marissa: That might be true.

Brown Guy: The fact is, the US has been performing their own jihads for decades. Just instead of Allah, the killing is done in the name of oil.
Brown Girl: Totally.
Summer: You guys, what is a jihad?
Brown Guy: Exactly.
Brown Girl: Way to reframe the question, Summer.
Summer: Hm.

Seth: Mocking Newport with Anna Stern. That is one of my favorite pasttimes.
Anna: Mine too.

Seth: Ryan, I am touching ivy right now.
Ryan: What?
Seth: Real ivy. It grows on the buildings here. Those pictures in the brochure, they are not Photoshopped.
Ryan: I take it you're in the middle of the quad right now?
Seth: Yeah. Dead center.
Ryan: Pretty stealth. I can't imagine anyone actually seeing you there.
Seth: I know, I know, it's a Summer hot zone. I just had to come and visit campus for a few minutes.
Ryan: And it's perfect?
Seth: Man, it's better than perfect. Seth Cohen has come home to roost.
(Someone off-screen calls out: Cohen!)
Ryan: Who's that?
Seth: I don't know. I'm too afraid to turn around.

Neil: Honey, I don't get it. You throw all of these parties with the dating service.
Well, I have Kirsten then. She's my wing woman.
Neil: So invite Kirsten. And Sandy. He can network with the doctors and she can... wing woman.

Seth: You're taking all that? You only own, like, a wifebeater and two hoodies.

Julie: (Referring to Marissa's change in attitude) Did a priest just break in here and perform an exocism?!

Jack: Your name is "Kumar"? (Referring to the badge Seth is wearing.)
Seth: Yes. Kumar Zimmerman. I'm half Indian, half Jewish. I am a Hinjew.

Marissa: How did he explain himself?
Summer: He didn't. Ok, well he tried to, but you know how I get Coop! Rage makes it hard to talk, let alone listen.

Kirsten: You know, they say when you grow up you marry your father. I thought I'd escaped that.

Anna: Cohen!
Seth: Yeah?
Anna: Confidence, remember?

Wes: Everyone belongs somewhere.
Marissa: Maybe not everyone. Maybe some people just get lost.

Wes: And then, what happened?
Marissa: Well, my dad lost all his money, the pony lost all its hair, and my mom kind of lost her mind. Also, I got kicked out of school, and my friend died. I guess everything happened.

Summer: What the hell are you doing here?
Seth: Oh, Providence in Spring. Can't beat it.

Julie: Thank you! I owe you one. Or... you know, maybe twenty-one. But who's counting?!

Julie: Marissa, honey, you know it's not too late for me to go with you. I promise I wouldn't embarrass you. I could pretend to be part of your entourage, or your Scientology guide!