The O.C. Season 4 Episode 14

Summer (to Sandy): Just go with it, it's Taylor.

Ryan: Taylor, are you pretending you're asleep so I'll tell you I love you while you're unconscious?
Taylor (Opens one Eye): Maybe.

Taylor: He definitely said it. Absolutely... I think.
Summer: Well, don't you think you'd remember.
Taylor: No, it hurts. Summer, what am I going to do? I can't just ask him 'Hey, by the way did you tell me you love me last night, because I was too plastered to remember?'
Summer: Right. Ok. Today's your birthday, right? And I happen to know that he got you a crazy, romantic present. So when you open it tonight, why don't you just be like 'Oh my gosh Ryan, I love you' and then like he said it last night, he'll say it again.
Taylor: You're a genius.
Summer: Yes, I am. It's all up here. (Points to her Head)

Summer: God, what is your problem Seth? I just want you to get excited about something.
Seth: I am. About things that are good. But I can do one of these doughnuts with both hands tied behind my back.
Summer: Really?! Prove it.
Seth: What?
Summer: Make a movie.
Seth: Are you serious?
Summer: Yeah! I want to see you do it better. I am going to watch the penguins again and don't you dare say anything.

Frank: Your mother doesn't think I'm boring.
Kaitlin: Well that's because you're sleeping with her.
Frank: Can you not say that kind of thing?
Kaitlin: Well, what do you want me to say? I mean is it true in prison on your first day you gotta make someone your bitch?

Summer: (Trying to help out Taylor) I... I just assumed... You guys have been together for a while and you seem pretty happy and thought why wouldn't you have said I love you.
I have an idea... Why don't you?
Ryan: What?
Summer: For her birthday! You should because... the book of poems is awesome but add that special little I love you, as a girl, I don't know... me personally, I get chills.
Ryan: Does Taylor expect me to tell her that I love her on her birthday?
Summer: What? No. I don't know. I gotta go.

Kaitlin: (to Frank) I mean, the Bullit went to prison and he was awesome... you're just boring.

Frank: I wanted to talk to you alone.
Kaitlin: You're not going to do anything pervy, are you?

Taylor: I don't know what to say.
Ryan: That's a first.

(While Ryan drags a drunk Taylor to her bedroom)
Taylor: I don't understand how you're not drunk?
Ryan: Oh, it's the Atwood genes, we're built to withstand massive quantities of alcohol.

Julie: Look Frank, I get that men have urges and I imagine prison is one of those places where those urges get twisted but I've never even heard of clown porn, I mean, that photo where they're all stuffed into a little car, it's...
Frank: It's not mine.
Julie: Oh really? It was just in your bag along with...this...
(pulls out a red clown's wig out of Frank's bag)
Julie: I mean, which one of us is supposed to wear this?
Frank: Julie, none of this is mine.
Julie: So someone just went into your bag, planted a wig and some really bad clown porn, who would.... Oh, Kaitlin!

(A sweaty Ryan limps into the kitchen)
Sandy: Morning, hey, are you alright?
Ryan: Yeah, it's just a cramp.
Sandy: How far did you go?
Ryan: Hmm, nine, ten miles.
Sandy: Ooh, wouldn't it be easier if you just said: Sandy, there's something bothering me, can you give me some advice?
Ryan: Yes it would, but where's the fun in that?

Ryan: Well Taylor, I'll tell you, planning your birthday party is not easy, I expect something in return.
Taylor: Oh!
Ryan: I expect to have my way with you.
(Ryan bends down and kisses Taylor on the cheek)
Taylor: Ah, (smiles) Ryan!

(Pointing at the frontpage of the Orange County Chronicle)
Summer: Did you see this about earthquake weather? You know, it's exactly this kind of voodoo science that let's politicians deny global warming.
Taylor: Oh my God, I know and how many times have they predicted the big one and it never happens. Almost makes you wish that it would.