The Odd Couple

Season 2 Episode 11

Being Divorced is Never Having to Say I Do

Aired Unknown Dec 10, 1971 on ABC
out of 10
User Rating
17 votes

By Users

Episode Summary

Oscar is happy that his ex-wife is remarrying, and there would be no more alimony. But Felix wants to stop the marriage.

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    Sam Nudell

    Sam Nudell


    Guest Star

    Brett Somers

    Brett Somers

    Blanche Madison

    Guest Star

    Billy Sands

    Billy Sands

    Roger Doctor

    Guest Star

    Richard Stahl

    Richard Stahl


    Recurring Role

    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (1)

    • QUOTES (20)

      • Felix: You know what I would like? I would like our regimental flag draped across my coffin. And -- hope this isn't pretentious -- I'd like it drawn by a team of white horses while the band plays the grand march from Aida, because that's my favorite opera. I'd like it to go around and around the cemetary three times. What would you like?
        Oscar: I'd like to be there.

      • Oscar: You're gonna make somebody a great wife, but don't underrate yourself. You gotta take the time to find the right guy.
        Blanche: I found him, but Elizabeth Taylor won't let him go.

      • Blanche: Well, we had fun in the beginning.
        Oscar: You kidding? We had a great year or two!
        Blanche: Two out of twelve ain't bad.

      • Felix: What's on?
        Oscar: Seven Brides for Seven Brothers.
        Felix: That's a wonderful movie.
        Oscar: You bet it's a wonderful movie. Seven ceremonies and nobody's objecting.

      • Felix: Love is that intense, vital, passionate feeling one person has for another.
        Oscar: That's it?
        Felix: Basically.
        Oscar: I have those feelings for you but I'm pretty sure it's hate!

      • Oscar: What is love, Dear Abby?
        Felix: What is love. What is love. Love is ... love is ... love is two people running hand in hand through the fields with the music playing and they're running and they're running and they're running...
        Oscar: That's not love. It's a toilet paper commercial!

      • Felix: It never would have worked out.
        Oscar: Oh, tell me about it, Mr. "Expert on marriage who's divorced and living with a slob."

      • Felix: Where're you going on your honeymoon?
        Blanche: Anywhere except where Oscar took me.
        Felix: Where was that?
        Blanche: To a hockey game between the Rangers and the Redwings where I got hit with a puck!

      • Felix: (looking around chapel) Awfully big for a Wee Kirk, isn't it?
        Oscar: Gives 'em a lot of room to kirk around in.

      • Felix: (about Blanche's description of Roger) Not once was the word, "love," mentioned.
        Oscar: I lived with her twelve years, not once was the word, "love," mentioned!

      • Oscar: What do you got against Roger? Steambaths? They have soap, towels, washcloths -- everything you put on your Christmas list. You should love him.

      • Felix: I wish you only the best, Blanche.
        Blanche: Thank you, Felix.
        Felix: Lord knows you didn't get it the first time.

      • Felix and Blanche: Get your feet off the chair!
        Oscar: Look at this. Nagging in stereo!

      • Felix: Use your napkin. (Oscar complies)
        Blanche: You're wonderful! I never got him any further than his sleeves!

      • Felix: (about Blanche's fiance) Good looking?
        Blanche: No, but I've never been attracted to good-looking men.
        Oscar: (glares at her) Well, I hope he has a sense of humor!

      • Felix: Where did he pop the question?
        Blanche: At the Whispering Pines.
        Oscar: Hey, that sounds romantic.
        Blanche: Romantic? It's a motel outside of Dayton.

      • Felix: I'm not really prepared for a celebration. All I've got is some German chocolate cake and Muskatel.
        Oscar: Perfect, if you're a Nazi wino.

      • Blanche: (surveying Oscar's room) Aw, same, old Oscar, neat as a pin. Wow, it's like a stroll down memory sewer.

      • Felix: Get up, get your clothes on. There's someone here to see you.
        Oscar: Who?
        Felix: Get up and see for yourself. An old friend. Someone very near and dear to you!
        Oscar: My bookie is here so early?

      • Felix: I've got good news and I've got bad news.
        Oscar: (sleepily) What time is it?
        Felix: 8 o'clock of a bright, sunny morning!
        Oscar: What's the good news?

    • NOTES (1)

    • ALLUSIONS (2)

      • Blanche's full name is Blanche Jefferson Madison, possibly a reference to the third and fourth presidents of the United States, Thomas Jefferson and James Madison.

      • The title is a variant of dialog and the tag line from the 1970 hit movie, Love Story, "Love means never having to say you're sorry."