Marge Simpson, Patty Bouvier, and Selma Bouvier
Mr. Burns, Ned Flanders, Principal Skinner, Waylon Smithers, Kent Brockman, and others
Homer Simpson, Grampa Simpson, Barney Gumble, Krusty the Clown, Groundskeeper Willie, and others
Bart Simpson, Nelson Muntz, Ralph Wiggum, Todd Flanders, and others
Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, Moe Szyslak, Chief Wiggum, Comic Book Guy, Lou, and others
Mr. Largo: (about Clarissa) When she sings a C, it's a C! Not like a certain Glee Club I've wasted my life on!
Bart: From now on, I'm only eating food that I know had a soul.
Lisa: But Dad, you don't need to help me by humiliating people!
Homer: Oh, you love sausage but you hate to see it getting made!
Lisa: I don't love sausage!
Homer: Then would you like to see it getting made?
Krusty: I was going to be your celebrity judge, but then I realized I'd have to pay attention.
Lisa: My kitty died on Christmas Eve, daddy told me to be brave, but instead of singing carols, I was digging Snowball's grave.
Lenny: Oh god! I miss Lisa's cat so much!
Lisa: That's Cameron. Girls go crazy over him. He's cute, unthreatening, and his smile brought a puppy back to life.
Lil' Starmaker Commercial: We're not affiliated with American Idol. We've never even heard of American Idol.
Krusty: So enter today especially if you're a funny looking kid who doesn't know he sucks!
Milhouse: I'm coming Krusty!
Lisa: (Singing) I've been to Paris and London and Tokyo town, but one crazy burg has them all beat hands down!
Sideshow Mel: Jacksonville!?
Lisa: I'm talkin' Springfield - you can buy chimichangas.
Talkin' Springfield - the chicks have big gazongas?
There's tires on fire, a guy named Apu.
And Skinner, and Grampa, and old Disco Stu.
Did I forget to mention you?
Lenny: You!? That's me!
Lisa: I'm talkin' Springfield, where nobody sucks... except for Flanders.
Krusty: Every week we eliminate one contestant based on the votes cast by you, the audience.
Announcer: Disclaimer: All ballots were lost and vote totals made up.
Lisa: Dad I don't want things to be awful between us! I made you some cookies!
Homer: I don't think cookies are gonna make me feel better. Oh oh oh god. Oh they're delicious. Oh so happy! Oh god they're so..... They're gone!
I'm a privileged boy,
It's great, I gotta tell ya.
My dad can buy and sell ya.
It really doesn't matter,
That you're on the list in front of me.
I'm gonna get your table,
'Cause I always tip the maitre d'.
And then I'll go to Yale,
Because I am a legacy,
I'm better than you.
Homer: Lisa sings so sweetly and Bart is my pillow. Everyone's good for something.
(Apu is being robbed)
Apu: Call the police.
Homer: I need change for a dollar.
Apu: No change without purchase.
Homer: What's the cheapest thing you've got.
Apu: A two ounce pack of chips. $5.99.
Homer: $5.99, what a rip-off! Someone should shoot you.
(After listening to Lisa's song)
Krusty: Wow, that was beautiful, even the Applause-O-Meter is crying. (Krusty wipes away fluid that was collecting on the Applause-O-Meter) Wait a minute, that's battery acid!
Homer: The song I wrote for you is so schmaltzy it makes "Moon River" sound like a farting orangutan.
I'm in the final two; I should be happy,
but all I want to do is spend more time with my pappy.
Now that you're gone, Dad, I miss you so much,
and your threats against teamsters, and techies, and such.
Your management style is like Attila the Hun.
You were vicious, malicious, but you got the job done.
I'm sorry I hurt you, but, please, don't be sad.
You're no longer my coach, but you're always my dad.
Homer: We're going to write and sing our way out of this God-forsaken hell hole.
Marge: But your song said you liked Springfield?
Homer: I wrote it about Shelbyville then changed the names.
Homer: Do you know how many hours I had to work? How many people I had to yell at? How many tires I had to slash?
Lisa: No one told you to yell and slash!
Homer: It's called schmoozing!
Homer: He's about to learn the most important lesson in the music business: don't trust people in the music business.
Homer: You did it!
Lisa: No, we did it!
Homer's Mind: She's right, it was all me!
Ralph: (Singing) A, B, C, D, E, F, G... How I wonder where you are.
(While Milhouse sings "When A Man Loves A Woman")
Lenny: Which one are you, the man or the woman?
Carl: Questioning a kid's sexuality? Well done!
This episode received the 2005 Emmy nomination for Outstanding Music And Lyrics.
The animal activism website mentioned in this episode (www.lisa.org) is in reality a non-profit organization for the GILT (Globalization, Internationalization, Localization, and Translation) business community.
The songs "I'm Talking Springfield," "My Kitty Died," "Always My Dad" and "Privileged Boy" featured lyrics by Carolyn Omine, music by Alf Clausen.
Homer's ability to write good songs was also acknowledged in the episode, Dude Where's My Ranch, when He wrote an anti-Flanders song that became a hit.
Blackboard Joke: None.
Couch Gag: In an homage to the 1960's spy-comedy Get Smart (complete with music), Homer goes through a series of secure doorways, goes inside a telephone booth, dials a number and falls through the floor onto the couch in his proper position, joining the rest of the family.
Homer's new title as Cameron's manager is a poke at Colonel Tom Parker, who was the eccentric manager of Elvis Presley.
n/a: American Idol
While the announcer makes the joke they're not affiliated, a good portion of the episode is a parody of the show American Idol.
Milhouse: When a man loves a woman...
The song that Milhouse sings on stage is "When A Man Loves A Woman" by Percy Sledge.
Homer: Everything I did, I did it for you!
A quick and funny reference to the Bryan Adams song "Everything I Do (I Do It For You)."
Homer: I'm calming down! We'll have family fun! FAMILY FUN!!
Homer going nuts in the car is a reference to the scene in National Lampoon's Vacation where Clark Griswold goes off on his family after they want him to go back home instead of reaching their destination, Wally World. His rant involves him talking about them having "family fun" and being on a "quest for fun".
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