Marge Simpson, Patty Bouvier, and Selma Bouvier
Mr. Burns, Ned Flanders, Principal Skinner, Waylon Smithers, Kent Brockman, and others
Homer Simpson, Grampa Simpson, Barney Gumble, Krusty the Clown, Groundskeeper Willie, and others
Bart Simpson, Nelson Muntz, Ralph Wiggum, Todd Flanders, and others
Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, Moe Szyslak, Chief Wiggum, Comic Book Guy, Lou, and others
Agnes Skinner, Brandine Del Roy, Dolph and others
(Dr. Hibbert is forced to work on Homer's roof to repay his error)
Dr. Hibbert: Homer, can I knock off? I've got surgery in the morning.
Homer: Not if those gutters aren't cleaned, you don't.
Moe: It's a surprise party for Lenny, thrown by his closest friends.
Homer: So what's Stephen Hawking doing here?
Stephen Hawking: I live here now. You're looking at the new owner of the Little Caesars down the street. Pizza Pizza...Pizza Pizza...Pizza Pizza...Pizza Pizza...Sorry, that button sticks.
(Dr. Hibbert places a mouthpiece in Homer's mouth)
Dr. Hibbert: Homer, that's just to bite on, not to eat. (He sighs as Homer swallows the mouthpiece)
Homer: Sorry. Give me one that doesn't taste so good.
Dr. Hibbert: That was rubber covered in Vaseline!
Homer: Marge, write that down so we can have it at home.
Dr. Hibbert: We can't begin this treatment soon enough.
Bart: Hey, Dad. Remember when you said if I used a chainsaw unsupervised, I'd hurt myself? Well, you were wrong. I hurt someone else.
Squeaky-Voiced Teenager: (Moaning after a giant chandelier has dropped on him) Oooooh! I have 45 minutes to get ready for the prom!
Homer: I think Ray could be my new best friend. We think alike, we act alike, we finish each other's sandwiches . . .
Homer: Don't worry, honey. I found us a roofer last night, and you'll never guess where.
Marge: Knockers on Route 98.
Homer: How did you know! (Gets up wearing a T-shirt from the Knockers bar.)
Marge: (Sarcastically) I'm psychic!
(Dr. Hibbert holds up a picture of Marge)
(Hibbert holds up a picture of Itchy and Scratchy)
Homer: Not real.
(Hibbert holds up a picture of Bart)
(Hibbert holds up a picture of Robin Hood)
Dr. Hibbert: Oh, sorry, Homer. But recent historical evidence indicates that Robin Hood did not actually exist.
(He shocks Homer again)
Homer: (Gibbering) Fascinating!
(After Homer's first shock treatment)
Marge: How you feeling, Sweetie?
Homer: Much better.
Dr. Hibbert: Do you see anyone here who isn't here?
Homer: Nope, just you, Marge, and Yogi Bear. (pause, then laughs) Kidding!!
Dr. Hibbert: (laughs) Well, I see your sense of humor's not affected. (seriously) That's a very bad sign. (Proceeds to shock Homer again)
(As everyone wonders why they couldn't see Ray before, proving Homer wasn't insane):
Bart: Wait, wait, wait wait! How come at Builder's Barn, I saw Homer talking to thin air?
Ray: Well, that...hmmmm....
Stephen Hawking: I can answer that! I've been tracking a tear in the fabric of space-time which combined with airborne pieces of metal at Builder's Barn to create a miniature black hole. This anomly interposed itself between Homer and Bart, causing a gravitational lens which abosrbed the light reflected from Ray the roofer.
Lisa: That seems...feasible.
Marge: Wait, there's still one last thing that doesn't make sense. Why did you start fixing our roof and just disappear?
Ray: That's easy--I'm a contractor. (Everyone laughs)
Marge: That's right--you're all crooks! (Everyone laughs again)
Ray: Yeah, yeah. We're all crooks, it's true!
(At the end of the ordeal) Homer: Wait a minute. I went through a lot of pain and suffering because of this little 'misunderstanding'. Somebody owes me big! Dr. Hibbert: Well, Homer, I could make it up to you. Maybe a free eyescrapping? Homer: That's a given. There's something else; something much more else.
(After Homer is discharged from Calmwood Mental Hospital)
Ray: Hello, Homer!
Homer: (screams) It's Ray! I see him again! Monster! You don't exist! (Smashes a chair on him)
Ray: Hey, no one calls me a monster and questions my existence! (punches Homer back)
Homer: The awesome power of the human mind! (faints on floor)
Marge: I see Ray too.
Bart: So do I.
Dr. Hibbert: Uh-oh. Well, I'm not worried. You've already agreed not to sue me for anything.
Marge: When did I agree to that?
Dr. Hibbert: You did when I validated your parking.
Marge: (holding up her parking slip) You didn't validate my parking.
(Dr. Hibbert punches a hole in the slip)
Dr. Hibbert: Check and mate. (chuckling smuggly)
Ray: So as I was saying, Homer, Mondays, 9 o'clock, CBS, they say everybody loves that guy, but I don't get it.
Homer: What do you talking about?
Ray: Hey, I am just saying, catch it while you still can.
Homer: What time is the show on?
Ray: Mondays, 9 o'clock, CBS
Homer: And what's the network?
Homer: And what time?
Ray: 9 o'clock.
Homer: If I want to watch it, what day?
Ray: Monday, Monday 9 o'clock.
Homer: And this is on the radio.
Ray: No, it's television. Monday, at 9, CBS.
Homer: And if I want to see it, what time should I watch it?
Ray: 9 o'clock.
Homer: On what channel?
Homer: What day?
Homer: On the RADIO?
Homer: Turn the television to what channel?
Homer: And what time?
Ray: 9 o'clock on Monday.
Homer: Now for I wanna see it on a certain day, what will be the best day to see it?
Ray: It's only on a Monday.
Homer: What time will be a good time?
Ray: 9 o'clock, from 9 to 9:30.
Homer: So, if I turn my radio on at 9 o'clock
Ray: Not a radio, television
Homer: So it's Mondays at 9, by NBC
Ray: 9 o'clock
Homer: On the radio
Homer: Televsion at 3 o'clock.
Kent Brockman: Kent Brockman here with StormWatch 6! Professor Frink, what's the scientific explanation for this unusually severe thunderstorm?
Professor Frink: Well, Kent, we are exploring two theories at this point. A: Either we have a super cell of high pressure fronts, or B: God is bowling! With the balls and the pins and the rental shoes and the very bad cheese pizza that comes in squares.
Homer: Don't worry. Ray will be back any minute.
Marge: It's after six. He's not coming back. He's a lousy roofer and a flake.
Homer: Hey! Watch what you say about him. I think Ray could be the one.
Marge: The one what?
Homer: My new best friend. We think alike. We act alike. We finish each other's sandwiches...
Marge: I don't wanna hear any more about Ray! Tomorrow morning you buy some shingles and fix that roof yourself!
Homer: Ray's not gonna like that.
Marge: You're not married to Ray.
Homer: Well if I was, we'd have taller kids!
Ray Magini is animated to look like and is voiced by Ray Romano.
This is the second time we see Calmwood Mental Hosptial. The first time was in the episode "Hurricane Neddy".
Celebrated by Fox as the 350th episode. Opening text of the episode was "350th Episode, Man."
Blackboard Joke: None.
Couch Gag: The living room is an almost fully assembled jigsaw puzzle, with only the pieces with the family members heads needing to placed. The person completing the puzzle places all the heads on correctly except for Homer and Maggie. He then swaps it, and says "woo-hoo!"
Though this episode was celebrated as the show's 350th episode, you can see above that it's really the 351st.
Ray: Catch it while you still can!
Ray plugs Ray Romano's own TV show, Everybody Loves Raymond. at the end of the show, telling everyone the time & network that it's on. "Catch it while you still can!" is a reference to the fact that "Raymond" is currently in it's final season.
Knockers is obviously a spoof of the popular big breasted waitress filled restaurant/sports bar Hooters.
Episode Title: Don't Fear The Roofer
The episode title is a parody of the band Blue Oyster Cult's hit, "Don't Fear The Reaper."
n/a: Sesame Street
Homer's friend Ray the roofer actually exists, while no one else believes he exists (because he leaves just before others arrive, or other circumstances). This references Big Bird's "imaginary friend" Mr. Snuffleupagus during the early years of Sesame Street. In the end, Homer is vindicated (when Ray shows up at the mental institution), just like Big Bird was when everyone saw Snuffy.
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