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Marge Simpson, Patty Bouvier, and Selma Bouvier
Mr. Burns, Ned Flanders, Principal Skinner, Waylon Smithers, Kent Brockman, and others
Homer Simpson, Grampa Simpson, Barney Gumble, Krusty the Clown, Groundskeeper Willie, and others
Bart Simpson, Nelson Muntz, Ralph Wiggum, Todd Flanders, and others
Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, Moe Szyslak, Chief Wiggum, Comic Book Guy, Lou, and others
Agnes Skinner, Brandine Del Roy, Dolph and others
Milhouse Van Houten, Rod Flanders, Jimbo Jones, and others
Music From This Episode
"It's the End of the World As We Know It" by R.E.M. (Performed by R.E.M. in Homer's garage.)
Lisa: And we should all be thankful to Michael, Peter and Mike for supplying this beautiful turkey, made entirely out of tofu.
Bart: I'm thankful I ate before I came.
Michael: Oh come on Bart. Smell those curds. Mmm... curds!
Lenny: How'd you get R.E.M. to play in your garage?
Homer: I told them it was a benefit. They think they're saving the rainforest!
Lisa: What are you doing?
Bart: To make a hole.
Lisa: A hole for what?
Bart: More digging.
Homer: I'm sorry I shot you, Moe.
Moe: Aw, that's okay. It's like my dad always said, "Eventually, everybody gets shot."
(Homer lays out a Thanksgiving dinner plate as a trap for the turkey.)
Homer: Okay, cranberry sauce, stuffing, potatoes. C'mon turkey, join your friends!
Lisa: Do you really think the turkey is just going to climb onto the plate?
Homer: I would.
Lisa: It's not fair, Dad. Why should an animal die just because you and Moe are fighting?
Homer: It's the law. My hands are tied.
Michael Stipe: (to Homer) You lied to us!
(He attacks Homer but the other members hold him back.)
Mike Mills: Michael, no!
Peter Buck: That's not the R.E.M. way.
Michael Stipe: (Calms down) You're right. Let's recycle those shards and get out of here.
Homer: Well, you've turned into a big phony!
Moe: Hey, nobody calls Moe St. Cool a phony!
Russian Model: All this yelling is taking avay my horny.
Moe: It is? Oh, that's it. Dogmar, Julien, throw this bum out!
Homer: I'll throw myself out, thank you.
Homer: Geez, Moe. You've been a real crank lately.
(Moe takes out a shotgun.)
Moe: You take that back.
Homer: Now, you see. That's what I'm talkin' about. You're always pointing that shotgun at us.
Lenny: And callin' us dumbasses.
Carl: Which we are so not.
Lisa: Where's Bart? His Mountain Dew's getting flat.
Marge: That's odd. He's outside, digging.
Homer: Probably digging for drugs.
Marge: There's no drugs out there.
Homer: (Suspiciously) No, of course not.
Homer: (Singing) Leonardo whats-his-name, Herman Munster motorcade, Birthday party cheetos, pogo sticks and lemonade, idiotic stupid jerk, that's right Flanders, I am talking about you!
Bart: Uh, yeah, I'd like to speak to a Mr. Tabooger, first name Ollie.
Homer: Ooh, Bart, my first prank call! What do I do?
Bart: Just ask if anyone knows Ollie Tabooger.
Homer: I don't get it.
Bart: Yell out "I'll eat a booger!"
Homer: What's the gag?
Bart: Oh, forget it. (Hangs up)
Professor: In one word, describe your bar.
Moe: Is crap hole one word?
Professor: Yes, if it's hyphenated.
Moe: Ok, I'll stick with crap-hole.
(An eagle starts pecking at Moe's face)
Moe: Ow, ow! Not the face!
(It starts pecking at Moe's crotch)
Moe: Ooh, ooh, okay the face!
(It starts pecking Moe's face again)
Moe: (relieved) Ooh. Whoa, that actually feels good after the--after the crotch.
Moe: That's the stupidest story I've ever heard, and I've read the entire Sweet Valley High series.
Blackboard Joke: A burp in a jar is not a science project.
Couch Gag: After a loose football bounces around in the living room, the Simpson family, decked out in football uniforms, all jump on the ball. Maggie emerges from the pile with the ball, spikes it and performs a victory dance.
Homer trying to start the jukebox by hitting it is a homage to the way the same way Fonzie started the jukebox at Arnold's in the classic TV series Happy Days.
The scene with Homer, Carl, Lenny and Barney dancing on the bar is a parody of similar bar dancing scenes from the 2000 film, Coyote Ugly.
Homer: ...and eventually I become king of the Morlocks.
Homer references "The Morlocks," who are a race of underground people from H.G. Wells' novel The Time Machine.
Homer: Look at the dad in Drabble, he's like an unfunny version of me.
Drabble is an actual syndicated comic-strip created by Kevin Fagan, and the strip has a dad who is goofy like Homer.
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