The Simpsons

Season 2 Episode 13

Homer vs. Lisa and the 8th Commandment

Aired Sunday 8:00 PM Feb 07, 1991 on FOX



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Bart: (about Hell) Wouldn't you eventually get used to it, like in a hot tub?

    • (While in Sunday School; Bart raised his hand)
      Mrs. Albright: Yes, Bart?
      Bart: Are there pirates in Hell?
      Mrs. Albright: Yes, thousands of them.
      Bart: (rubs hands) Hoo hoo, baby!

    • (In bed, Homer and Marge argue about the illegal cable.)
      Marge: But Homer, I'm afraid that cable has become an evil presence in our home.
      Homer: (Sternly) Marge, I never put my foot down about anything.
      Marge: No--
      Homer: But I am severely tempted to do it over this. (Raises foot)
      Marge: Oh, Homer.
      Homer: Marge, I'm sorry. I think it's coming down.
      Marge: No, Homer! Not--
      Homer: (Sticks foot over floor) It's coming down. My foot, it's--
      Marge: No!
      Homer: That's it, Marge. The cable stays. The foot has spoken. (Slams foot down)

    • (Bart and the family watch TV.)
      Bart: Oh, cool! This is where "Jaws" eats the boat! … Man, this is where "Die Hard" jumps through the window. … (Laughs) Whoa! This is where "Wall Street" gets arrested! (Chuckles)

    • (Moses appears before the Israelites with the Ten Commandments.)
      Moses: The Lord has handed down to us Ten Commandments by which to live. I will now read them in no particular order. "Thou shalt not make any graven images."
      Hezron, Carver of Graven Images: (Throws down chisel) Oh, my God!
      Moses: "Thou shalt not commit adultery."
      Zohar the Adulterer: Ah, well. Looks like the party's over.
      Homer the Thief: (Chuckles) Hey, Moses, keep 'em comin'.
      Moses: "Thou shalt not steal."
      Homer the Thief: D'oh!

    • (Marge inquires about Sunday school.)
      Marge: So, what did you children learn about today?
      Bart: Hell.
      Homer: Bart!
      Bart: Well, that's what we learned about. I sure as hell can't tell you we learned about hell unless I say "hell," can I?
      Homer: Eh, The lad has a point.
      Bart: Hell, yes!
      Marge: Bart!
      Bart: (Singing) Hell, hell, hell, hell, hell, hell, hell, hell, hell, hell, hell, hell, hell.
      Marge: Bart, you're no longer in Sunday school. Don't swear!

    • (Mr. Burns arrives to watch the big fight.)
      Mr. Burns: Oh, Simpson, good news. I brought some mun-chies. Eh, Smithers, the Cheetos.

    • (Apu arrives for the big fight.)
      Apu: Oh, hello, Mrs. Homer! I've brought an assortment of jerkies.
      (Apu hands Marge the jerkies.)
      Homer: Ooh, did you swipe those from work?
      Apu: Oh, certainly not. What has been implied here?

    • (Mr. Burns and Smithers watch security camera footage of Homer inviting the guys over for the big fight.)
      Smithers: Um, he's Homer Simpson, sir. One of your drones from Sector 7-G.
      Mr. Burns: Excellent. I'm so keen on seeing Watson vs. Tatum II, I'd even go to an employee's house. Oh, I can picture it now. The screen door rusting off it's filthy hinges, mangy dogs staggering about, looking vainly for a place to die.
      Smithers: Permission to speak frankly, sir?
      Mr. Burns: Permission granted.
      Smithers: Well, you are quite wealthy--
      Mr. Burns: Thank you, Smithers. Your candor is most refreshing.
      Smithers: No, no, I mean, why don't you pay for the fight yourself?
      Mr. Burns: Ah, Smithers, the big title fight is one of those rare occasions that I savor the sights, the sounds and (sniffs) ah, yes, the smells of men.
      Smithers: You haven't lost the common touch, sir.

    • (Homer watches a Jerry Seinfeld type comedian on TV.)
      Comedian: Don't you hate it when you go to the bathroom… and there's no toilet paper?
      (Homer and the TV audience laugh.)
      Homer: It's funny 'cause it's true!

    • (Troy McClure hosts an infomercial for a new type of candy that cleans and straightens teeth.)
      Troy McClure: Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like you to meet the inventor, Dr. Nick Riviera.
      (Audience applauds)
      Dr Nick: Thank you, Troy! Hi, everybody!
      Audience: Hi, Dr. Nick!

    • (Marge and the kids come home from shopping.)
      Homer: Oh, hey, hey. Family, family, come here. I have an announcement to make. The Simpsons have cable!
      Bart and Lisa: (In unison) Cable!?
      (The kids excitedly clamour in front of the TV.)
      Homer: That's right, 68 channels. MTV for the kids, (To Marge) VH-1 for us. Sixteen hundred hours of quality programming, every day!
      Marge: Homer, we've talked about cable before. Do you really think we can afford it?
      Homer: (Chuckles) Nothing a month? Yeah, I think we can swing that.
      Marge: Mmm. Are you sure this is legal?
      Homer: Don't worry, Marge. Take a look at this.
      (Homer hands Marge a pamphlet entitled, "So, You've Decided To Steal Cable.")
      Marge: (Reads from pamphlet) "Myth: It's only fair to pay for quality first-run movies. Fact: Most movies shown on cable get two stars or less, and are repeated ad nauseam." Hmm. I don't know.
      Homer: (Enticingly) Marge.
      (Homer turns the channel.)
      Woman Announcer: Hear Me Roar, the network for women.
      Woman TV Host: In the next half-hour, we'll show you how to cut your first-aid bill in half by making your own band-aids.
      Marge: Ooh, that's a good idea.

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • Stardust Memories
      The Top Hat Entertainment Channel features a movie called Stardust Mammeries, which is a twisted take on the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories.

    • Broadcast News
      On the Adult Film Channel a promo for the show Broadcast Nudes can be heard. This is a play on the title of the 1987 film Broadcast News, written and directed by Simpsons producer James L. Brooks.

    • North by Northwest
      Homer jumping in front of the illegal cable salesman's truck to flag it down, and getting hit in the process, mirrors a scene in the 1959 film North by Northwest.

    • Professional Boxing
      Heavyweight boxer Drederick Tatum is styled after former world heavyweight champion Mike Tyson. Tatum's manager, Lucious Sweet is a near carbon copy of Don King. Watson, Tatum's opponent, is the Simpsons' version of James "Buster" Douglas.