Homer Simpson, Grampa Simpson, Barney Gumble, Krusty the Clown, Groundskeeper Willie, and others
Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, Moe Szyslak, Chief Wiggum, Comic Book Guy, Lou, and others
Mr. Burns, Ned Flanders, Principal Skinner, Waylon Smithers, Kent Brockman, and others
Marge Simpson, Patty Bouvier, and Selma Bouvier
Bart Simpson, Nelson Muntz, Ralph Wiggum, Todd Flanders, and others
J. Jonah Jameson Type
Milhouse Van Houten, Rod Flanders, Jimbo Jones, and others
Agnes Skinner, Brandine Del Roy, Dolph and others
Music From This Episode
"Freeze Frame" by J Geiles Band (While the family restages their family photos.)
We learn that Rainier Wolfcastle's middle name is Luftwaffe.
The settings on Bart's "Catch A Rising Krusty" doll are: mother-in-law, stolen jokes and current events.
Gabbo appears for the third time following his debut in episode 4-22, "Krusty Gets Kancelled" and second appearance in episode 11-17, "Bart to the Future."
The item Marge chooses to put in the fireproof safe is the same photo album ("Precious Memories") shown in the episode "Bart Carny." Spud asks Cooder which photo album to throw in the fire, "Treasured Moments" or "Precious Memories," and decides to burn "Treasured Moments." We assume that Marge didn't want her last photo album to get destroyed by fire too.
During the Star Trek: Voyager marathon, Dr. Hibbert and Lenny are dressed like the Voyager characters Tuvok and 7 of 9, respectively.
We learn that Homer's cologne on his and Marge's first date was "Scent of a Wookie". It seems appropriate since there first date was at a movie theatre watching The Empire Strikes Back.
During the re-taking of the photos, Homer, Bart and Lisa make themselves up to be their 1987 animated counterparts.
This is the second time that Homer works in the field of journalism, the first time was in "Guess Who's Come to Criticize Dinner?"
This episode marks the return of several guest stars; this will be the ninth appearance from Jon Lovitz and the second from J.K. Simmons and Betty White.
Lenny: Homer, don't be so quick to abandon this paparazzo thing.
Carl: Yeah, it's the American tradition to cut people down to size because they're brought so much joy into our lives.
Lenny: You know who I can't stand? That Robin Williams. You know one time I saw him eating dinner with his children. He wouldn't take the time out to do all the funny bits from his movies.
Carl: And my sister once saw Burt Reynolds at an airport, and he wouldn't even cosign her mortgage.
Homer: You guys are right! I should get back into the game. (Moaning) Oh, but I threw away my camera!
Moe: Oh, here. (Hands Homer his camera) Use this one. I was gonna use it to take secret photos in the ladies' toilet, but no dames ever come in this joint.
Homer: Thanks, Moe. (Leaves the bar)
(Two pretty women enter)
Woman #1: Excuse me, do you have a ladies' room?
Woman #2: We need to trade bras and panties.
Moe: Oh! You gotta be kidding me! (Breaks a beer bottle horizontally with his hands.)
(After the family puts their special items in the safe, smoke begins coming out.)
Bart: What's that comin' out of the safe?
Homer: I don't know--Maybe the Krusty doll accidentally turned on the car's headlights, which focused on the cologne bottle, causing it to boil and soon explode.
Lisa: Dad, that's ridiculous!
(The safe blows apart from the explosion.)
Krusty Doll: What's the deal with this California pizza? If I wanted cheese and fruit--(As it burns from the flames and begins melting)--I'd...have...to...(Melts into a plastic puddle)
Marge: (Devastated when the family album falls apart into ashes) Nooooooo! It's gone! That family album was a record of my accomplishments! It's like what a resume is for a man.
Lisa: I agree, Mom. It's very sad. But we'll have to move on. It's not like we can restage all our family photos.
Marge: (Becoming delighted upon the idea) Restage the photos!
Bart: Lisa you fool, you've doomed us all!
(Marge quickly puts a baby bonnet on him and snaps a shot with her camera as he cries out before she takes a second shot, which is among the first ones seen in the new family album.)
Paris Texan: (with finger in her dog's mouth) Come on, baby! Barf for mama!
Editor: (looking through Homer's photos) Terrific! Outstanding! This has Page One written all over it! What the hell did you do that for?
(he holds up a photograph with "Page One" written all over it in ink)
Homer: I wanted to remember my place in the book I was reading.
Editor: This is good, real good, like Lindsay Lohan looking drunk, high and bony, click, career over, see ya in the gutter, Freckles! Homer, I'll pay ya 200 bucks. Bring me more snaps like this, and I'll make you a moderately wealthy man.
Homer: Moderately wealthy? (gasps)
(Homer pictures himself rolling about in a small amount of money)
Dream Homer: Whee! I'm sort of rich! I can rent anything I want!
Homer: (to editor) That's quite an offer. Can I discuss it with my wife?
Editor: Sure, why not?
Homer: Then I'll do it!
Marge: This disaster-ette was a real wake-up call. We need to find a way to protect our irreplaceables.
Firefighter: You could buy a fireproof safe.
Homer: Or we could just resolve to be more careful with our open flames!
Firefighter: Sir, we've been here six times this month.
Homer: Yeah, but, um, one of those, I dialed 911 by mistake but I was too embarrassed to admit it so I set the house on fire. Feels good to tell the truth. No, I'm lying again, it feels bad.
Firefighter: Do you know how many fires are started by birthday candles? If you do, tell me. It would settle a bet down at the station house. I say five, Gus says a million.
Lisa: Dad, you're out of shape even for an American.
Homer: (slowly) How do you want your comeuppance? 8x10, or wallet size!?
Waitress: Stem cell fajita?
Rainer: Leave the tray.
Homer: Can't I even have privacy here!?
(Camera pans to Homer showering under a fire hydrant.)
Homer: Now Maggie, I had to use your car seat to hold the new TV Guide, so I'm gonna hang you from the mirror.
Bart: (to Paris Texan) Hey Paris! I saw an ugly part of your body on the internet, your face!
Homer: First Amendment rules, privacy drools!
(Marge reads The Inquisitor at the Quik-E-Mart)
Marge: Sideshow Mel is in a custody battle? And it's getting bitter?
Apu: Read one more thing, and it's a purchase!
Marge: "Experts disagree on location of Heaven"?
Krusty Doll: What's with technology today? I-Pod, I-Tunes, I give up!
Krusty Doll: Where do kids today get these band names? The Kinks? The Stones? Sounds like my last physical!
Bart: Ha ha, references.
Homer: (sadly) Oh Captain Janeway! Your mission ended too soon!
Marge: (About the album) It was like a resume to a man.
Homer: Aw, our kids use to be so cute.
Bart: Used to?
Homer: Oh, deal with it!
(Homer gets ready to blow out his birthday candles)
Homer: I don't need to make a wish, because I already have this wonderful family . . . I wish for infinity hamburgers.
Homer: Look at those celebrities, I've met them all, and yet they don't acknowledge my existence.
Betty White: Hello Homer, have you lost weight?
Homer: Oh like you care Betty White.
Betty White: Tell me, how's Maggie?
Homer: Her name is Marge!
Betty White: I was talking about your baby.
Homer: Oh, uh, she's looking very (Snaps picture) SNAPPY!
Betty White: Thanks for taking my picture. If you want me to sign it, here's a stamped self-addressed envelope, and give Santa's Little Helper a big hug for me.
Homer: (shakes fist) Yeah, that's right, just walk away.
At one minute and nine seconds, tonight's couch gag is now the longest one in Simpson's history, edging out "The Powers of Ten" that clocked in at 45 seconds.
Blackboard Joke: Global warming did not eat my homework.
Couch Gag: This extended version showcases the evolution of Homer Simpson, beginning as a single-cell organism which continuously divides to a more complex organism, first as a jellyfish, then a common fish that nearly escapes the clutches of an octopus that resembles Mr. Burns. Getting out of the ocean, Homer evolves into a prehistoric lizard that extends his tongue to snack on an insect that resembles Lenny. He then evolves into a slightly larger lizard with a scale on his back that sees a Pterodactyl resembling Agnes Skinner flying overhead. Homer then evolves into a rat that gets chased by a Tyrannosaurus resembling Bart, who then gets into a battle with a Triceratops resembling Lisa. Homer hides in a hole just before a large asteroid crashes on Earth, wiping out all dinosaur life. Homer comes out of the hole, passing the bony fossil of T-Rex Bart, before changing into a sloth, then a monkey as he approaches a jungle, becoming more apelike upon swinging through the trees. Leaving the jungle, a brief Ice Age occurs as he evolves from Neanderthal, to caveman, and passes caveman Moe (who gives a brief "Hey" hello) before he de-evolves into a rat. Homer continues evolving, morphing into period clothing with appropriate backgrounds from medieval, Spanish explorer, Pilgrim, English scholar, and finally to modern day Homer Simpson with the nuclear plant in the background as he finally reaches home and walks over Santa's Little Helper sleeping on the doorstep as he enters the house. With the rest of the family sitting on the sofa, Marge asks him "What took you so long?" Homer can only give an exhausted sigh of relief.
The paparazzi photo of Homer driving with Maggie hanging from the rearview mirror is a poke at Britney Spears, who was caught by a photographer driving with her baby in her lap.
Scent of a Woman: The cologne name "Scent of a Wookie" is a parody of the title of this Al Pacino film.
The title of Marge's script "Mrs. Mom" is a reference to this 1983 film.
The Inquisitor tabloid that Marge is reading is a reference to the popular tabloid The National Enquirer.
Bart: Look, it's the Rich Texan, and his daughter, Paris Texan.
Paris Texan resembles hotel heiress and tabloid star Paris Hilton, right down to the tiny chihuahua she carries.
Star Trek Voyager:
The gang re-watches old episodes of Star Trek Voyager, this show is the 3rd spin-off of the Star Trek franchise after The Original Series, The Next Generation and Deep Space Nine.
The episode title is an allusion to the term "paparazzi," which originates from an Italian word for "mosquito."
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