Homer Simpson, Grampa Simpson, Barney Gumble, Krusty the Clown, Groundskeeper Willie, and others
Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, Moe Szyslak, Chief Wiggum, Comic Book Guy, Lou, and others
Mr. Burns, Ned Flanders, Principal Skinner, Waylon Smithers, Kent Brockman, and others
Marge Simpson, Patty Bouvier, and Selma Bouvier
Bart Simpson, Nelson Muntz, Ralph Wiggum, Todd Flanders, and others
Milhouse Van Houten, Rod Flanders, Jimbo Jones, and others
Music from this episode
"One" from A Chorus Line (During the end credits, the Simpsons and Willie sing this song.)
Only the Simpsons and Groundskeeper Willie, who dies by ax every time, appeared in all 3 segments.
In "Nightmare Cafeteria", the machine that chops up Bart, Lisa, & Milhouse is a Hamilton Beech Student Chopper.
In "The Shinning" segment, Homer can be seen drinking a beverage called "Red Rum" which spells "Murder" backwards. At the same scene, you can see Maggie assembling blocks that spells the same thing.
Goof: In "Nightmare Cafeteria", when Principal Skinner is cornering Bart, Lisa, and Milhouse, he is shown from the back wearing an apron, but in the next scene, he is talking to Bart, and it is gone. Then he reaches out of nowhere behind him and ties it again.
(In the Teachers' Cafeteria)
Mrs. Krabappel: Mmm, mmm, mmm. This sandwich tastes so young and impudent, heh heh. Seymour, what's with the good grub?
Principal Skinner: Mmm, well perhaps I ought to let you folks in on a secret! Do you remember me telling Jimbo Jones that I would "make something of him" one day?
Mrs. Krabappel: (gasps) Are you saying you killed Jimbo, processed his carcass and served him for lunch?
(Skinner points at his nose)
Mrs. Krabappel: Ha!
(Marge spots a typewriter)
Marge: What he's typed will be a window into his madness. "Feelin' fine." Well, that's a relief.
(A bolt of lighting reveals writing on the walls stating: NO TV AND NO BEER MAKE HOMER GO CRAZY.)
Marge: Hmmm, this is less encouraging.
(Homer appears, scaring Marge, and turns on a light.)
Homer: So, what do you think Marge? All I need is a title. I was thinking on the lines of "No TV and No Beer Make Homer" something something.
Marge: Go crazy?
Homer: Don't mind if I do! (Goes insane)
(Homer attacks a room with an axe)
Homer: Heeeere's Johnny!
(Camera pulls back to reveal empty room)
Homer: D'oh! (chops into another room) Daaaaavid Letterman!
Grampa: Hi David, I'm Grampa.
(Homer chops another door holding a stopwatch)
Homer: I'm Mike Wallace, I'm Morley Safer, and I'm Ed Bradley. All this and Andy Rooney tonight on 60 Minutes!
(Bart, Lisa, and Milhouse are being chased by ravenous teachers when Groundskeeper Willie comes.)
Groundskeeper Willie: Hold on, kids! I'm coming to rescue the lot of ya!
(Principal Skinner sneaks up behind him and strikes him with an ax, killing him for the third time.)
Groundskeeper Willie: Oh, I'm bad at this.
(After Bart wakes up from his nightmare.)
Marge: Relax, honey. You were just having a crazy nightmare. You're back with your family now where there's nothing to be afraid of, except that fog that turns people inside out.
(The fog starts coming in through cracks in the window.)
Homer: Uh-oh, it's seeping in. Stupid, cheap weather stripping!
Principal Skinner: (To Bart) I'm going to enjoy devouring you, Simpson. I think I'll start as you've so often suggested by...eating your shorts!
Marge: Good morning, dear.
Homer: (Grabbing Marge) What's my name? What color is the sky? What of donuts? What?! For the love of God, tell me!
Marge: Homer! The sky is blue, donuts are plentiful, Friday is TGIF night on ABC. What's gotten into you?
Homer: Nothing... nothing at all. Let's just eat.
(Homer then sees that everyone is eating by flinging their tongues out like lizards.)
Homer: (Shrugs) Eh, close enough.
Homer: Hmm, fabulous house, well-behaved kids, sisters-in-law dead, luxury sedan… Woo hoo! I hit the jackpot. Marge, dear, would you kindly pass me a donut?
Marge: Donut? What's a donut?
Homer: Aah! Aah!
(Homer runs back to the basement and activates his time machine. As he does, donuts begins to fall from the sky.)
Marge: Oh, it's raining again.
Homer: This shouldn't be too hard to fix...with the right tools.
(breaks the toaster open with a rock)
Homer: You know, Marge, I've had my share of troubles, but sitting here now with you and the kids in our cozy home in this beautiful free country...it just makes me feel that I'm really a lucky guy.
Lisa: Dad! Your hand is jammed in the toaster!
Homer: Aah! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off of me! (throws the toaster off his hand, sighs, slumps down to floor)
Bart: Dad! It's in there again!
Groundskeeper Willy: No, no, go easy on the wee one. His father's going to go crazy and chop 'em all into haggis!
Principal Skinner: Now, let's check on the free-range children.
Family: One! Chorus line of people,
Dancing till they make us stop,
Groundskeeper Willie: Too!
Everyone: Many dancing people,
Covered with blood, gore and glop
Just one sniff of that fog
And you're inside out,
It's worse than that flesh-eating virus
You've read about.
Vital organs, they are what we're dressed in.
The family dog is eyeing Bart's intestine.
Groundskeeper Willy: Boy! Ye read my thoughts! You've got the shinning!
Bart: You mean 'shining.'
Groundskeeper Willy: Shhh! Ye wanna get sued?
Giant Bart: Hey, there's a bug that looks like Dad. Let's kill it!
Giant Lisa: Okay!
Homer: (while being chased by dogs) Oh no, they're gaining on me. Wait, I have an idea. (takes out sausages) These weiners will give me the quick energy I need to escape!
Ned: Now, in case all that smiling didn't cheer you up, there's one thing that never fails. A nice glass of warm milk, a little nap, and a total frontal lobotomy!
Homer: What the hell are you smiling at?
Homer: What the hell is that geek, Flanders, doing on TV?
Ned: (on TV) Oh, I see by the Big Board we got a Negative Nellie in Sector 2! I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask the whole family to kind of freeze and prepare for re-Neducation.
Bart: Don't you remember, Dad? Flanders is the unquestioned lord and master of the world.
Homer: Come family. Sit in the snow with Daddy and let us all bask in television's warm glowing warming glow.
(Bart uses his shinning to call Willie for help)
Groundskeeper Willie: Uh oh. The little fat boy and his family are in trouble!
Marge: (talking into radio) Hello, police? This is Marge Simpson. My husband is on a murderous rampage! Over.
Chief Wiggum: Well thank God that is over. I was worried there for a second.
(Homer is in the bar, where he sees the ghost of Moe appear in front of him.)
Moe: So, what'll it be, Homer?
Homer: Moe! Give me a beer!
Moe: No. Not unless you kill your family.
Homer: Why should I kill my family??
Moe: Because, uh... They'd be much happier as ghosts.
Homer: You don't look so happy…
Moe: (sarcastically) Oh, I'm happy! I'm very happy! La, la, la, la, la, la, la… See? (grabs Homer by his shirt) Now waste your family, so I can give you a beer!
Mr. Burns: This house has quite a long and colorful history. It was build on an ancient Indian burial ground and was the setting of satanic rituals, witch-burnings, and five John Denver Christmas specials.
Homer: Ew, John Denver.
Homer: It was a long trip, but we're almost there.
Marge: Homer, did you remember to lock the front door of the house?
Homer: Well, it's been two long trips, but we're finally almost there again.
Marge: When you locked the front door, did you remember to lock the back door?
Homer: D'oh! D'oh!
Lisa: Oh no! We left Grampa back at the gas station. (Homer does not respond and continues driving) What about Grampa?
Marge: Hello, once again. As usual I must warn you all that this year's Halloween show is very very scary. Those of you with young children may want to send them off to bed and - (someone gives Marge a piece of paper, which she reads) Oh my. It seems that the show is so scary that Congress won't even let us show it! Instead, they suggested the 1947 Glenn Ford classic movie, "200 Miles to Oregon".
(A short clip of the movie is shown, but it suddenly goes out and is then replaced by an actual voice-activated oscilloscope, with sound waves appearing to Bart's voice, ala The Outer Limits opening...)
Bart: There's nothing wrong with your television set. Do not attempt to adjust your picture. WE are controlling the transmission.
Homer: What's that, boy, we're in control? Hey, look. I can see my voice! Heh-heh-heh-heh! (makes stupid noises, then sings...) Blub-blub-blub-blub-blub! Thiiis, iiiis myyy vooooice, on TeeeeVeeee!!!
Bart: DAD! You're ruining the mood!
Bart: For the next half-hour, we will control what you see and hear. You are about to experience the terror and foul horror of... the Simpsons Halloween Special.
(As he says the last four words, one of the lines on the oscilloscope forms the outlines of the Simpson family's heads.)
Homer: Television - teacher, mother, secret lover!
(blood pours out of the elevator)
Mr. Burns: Hmm, that's odd. Usually the blood gets off at the second floor.
(kills all the dinosaurs with one sneeze)
Homer: Oh, this is gonna cost me.
(the family is frozen after watching TV in the snow)
TV: Live from New York, it's the Tony Awards!
Bart: Homer… change channel!
Homer: Can't! Frozen!
(singing starts on TV)
Homer: Urge to kill, rising…
Principal Skinner: Over here, Simpson. The detention room is dangerously overcrowded so you'll be serving your time in the cafeteria.
Boy in Detention Room: Oxygen, running out...
Principal Skinner: Yes, you should have thought of that before you made that paper airplane!
Bart: I wonder where Jimbo is today. He should've beaten us up for our lunch money an hour ago.
Homer: Mustn't crush. Mustn't kill! Made it! (accidentally sits on a fish) Oh, I wish I wish I didn't kill that fish.
Principal Skinner: Now that's your third helping young man, making you fat and soft and tender. Um, you just cut in line didn't you? Report to detention Uter.
Uter: For how long?
Principal Skinner: Um, seven minutes a pound should do it.
Homer: Hmm, cable's out. I think I'll have a beer. Hmm, not a drop in the house. What do you know.
Marge: Homer, I'm impressed! You're taking this quite well.
Homer: I'll kill you! I'll kill all of you!
Homer: Sorry, sorry. Don't worry, there's plenty I can do to keep myself occupied. Maybe I'll check out that axe collection. See you later.
Lisa: Mom, is dad going to kill us?
Marge: We're going to just have to wait and see.
Groundskeeper Willie: Now look, boy. If your dad goes gaga, you just use that "shin" of yours to call me and I'll come a running. But don't be reading my mind between 4 and 5. That's Willie's time!
Homer: As long as I stand perfectly still and don't touch anything, I won't destroy the future. (a mosquito comes) Stupid bug, you go squish now!
Homer: I've gone back to the time when dinosaurs weren't just confined to zoos!
Mr. Burns: Yes, by cutting off cable TV and the beer supply, I can ensure an honest winter's work out of those low-lives.
Smithers: Sir, did you ever stop to think that maybe it was doing this that caused the previous caretakers to go insane and murder their families?
Mr. Burns: Hmm, perhaps. Tell you what. We come back and everyone's slaughtered, I owe you a Coke.
Principal Skinner: Oh, relax kids. I've got a gut feeling Uter's around here somewhere. After all, isn't there a little Uter in all of us? In fact, you might say we just ate Uter and he's in our stomachs right now! Wait. Scratch that one.
Groundskeeper Willie: You're still not in your own world, Homer! I can get you home, but you'll have to do exactly as I- (screams and falls over dead from Maggie impaling him from behind with an axe.)
Maggie: (deep voice) This is indeed a disturbing universe…
Homer: I'm the first non-Brazilian person to travel backwards through time!
Mr. Peabody: Correction, Homer. You're the second.
Sherman: That's right, Mr. Peabody!
Mr. Peabody: Quiet, you.
Homer: Urge to kill fading, fading, fading, rising! Fading, fading, gone.
Homer: Can't murder now. Eating.
(As Groundskeeper Willie shows up to save Marge and the kids, Homer stabs him in the back with an ax.)
Groundskeeper Willie: Aw, is that the best you can do?
(Groundskeeper Willie collapses, dead.)
Marge: Oh, my. I hope that rug was Scotchgarded.
Jimbo: It's hard to scrub this giant pot when you keep spilling meat tenderizer all over me.
(The pot lid slams down on top of Jimbo.)
Jimbo: Oh, great. Now I gotta work in the dark.
This episode was nominated for a 1995 Emmy Award for Outstanding Individual Achievement in Music Composition for a Series (Dramatic Underscore).
List of the Halloween names used by the staff on this episode:
MORBID MATT GROENING
JAMES HELL BROOKS
MATT "GRAVE-ROBBIN" GROENING
SAM "SAYONARA" SIMON
THE SHAWS-HANK AZARIA
Blackboard Joke: none
Couch Gag: Simpson zombies all run to the couch. Each of them have different body parts of another member of their family. When they get on the couch, they trade heads.
In the "Nightmare Cafeteria" segment, originally Bart and Lisa went to both their parents instead of just Marge. After they tell them what's happening, Homer goes on a long speech about how he has made recipes on how to cook Milhouse. But it got cut.
In the "Time and Punishment" segment when we see all the different houses, (a shoe, the house underwater, and the Flintstone's house) originally one of them was the Simpsons' home made entirely out of squirrels. An animator painstakingly drew the Simpsons' home exterior made of tiny squirrels only to have the shot cut from the episode.
In the "Nightmare Cafeteria" segment, teachers putting kids in a giant blender is very similar to the music video for "The Wall" by Pink Floyd with teachers putting kids in a giant mincer.
In the "Time and Punishment" segment people who dissent are "reeducated" just like those in the classic George Orwell novel 1984.
The Outer Limits
Bart's voice over before title sequence is a reference to the opening of the 1960's sci-fi television program The Outer Limits.
In "Time and Punishment" one of the forms that the house changes into is based on the first McDonalds restaurant stand from 1955.
Homer: The first non-Brazilian to travel through time.
Homer was referring to Carlos Castaneda, a Brazilian who wrote about his chemical-induced "time-travel adventures" about twenty years ago in a set of books from the late 60's, early 70's.
Terminator 2: Judgment Day / Time Bandits
There is a scene in which we can see the floor morphing into a television screen. This is a reference to scenes in the films Terminator 2: Judgment Day and Time Bandits.
Segment Title: "The Shinning"
This is a parody of the classic Steven King novel The Shining, which was later made into a movie starring Jack Nicholson. The Shining is about a man who gets "cabin fever" while on vacation with his family and goes mad with an axe.
Segment Title: "Time and Punishment"
This title is a parody of the novel Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky.
A Sound of Thunder
"Time and Punishment" is based on a Ray Bradbury short story called "A Sound of Thunder."
Segment Title: "Nightmare Cafeteria"
The title of this segment refers to Nightmare Cafe, a one season NBC show produced by Wes Craven.
Homer: "David Letterman", "I'm Mike Wallace . . . tonight on Sixty Minutes"
Homer's first entrance uses the quote 'Heeeeerrrre's Johnny!' from the 1980 film adaptation of Stephen King's The Shining. After that he enters with introductions to Letterman and Sixty Minutes. This is a reference to the fact that "Here's Johnny" was also used to open The Tonight Show when Johnny Carson was the host.
The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show
Two time travelling cartoon characters from The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show, Mr. Peabody and Sherman, made a gag appearance in "Time and Punishment."
At one point in "Time and Punishment," Homer gets frustrated, goes back to the past, and starts killing everything in sight. In the present, we see numerous variations of the Simpson home flash by as Homer fractures history. One of the alternate houses we briefly see is the stone house of Fred and Wilma Flintstone from of course The Flintstones.
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