Homer Simpson, Grampa Simpson, Barney Gumble, Krusty the Clown, Groundskeeper Willie, and others
Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, Moe Szyslak, Chief Wiggum, Comic Book Guy, Lou, and others
Mr. Burns, Ned Flanders, Principal Skinner, Waylon Smithers, Kent Brockman, and others
Marge Simpson, Patty Bouvier, and Selma Bouvier
Bart Simpson, Nelson Muntz, Ralph Wiggum, Todd Flanders, and others
Maude Flanders, Helen Lovejoy, Miss Hoover, and others
Milhouse Van Houten, Rod Flanders, Jimbo Jones, and others
Groundskeeper Willie is seen reading a Weekly Reader magazine.
While Mr. Burns is walking in the twilight following the town meeting, comments made and shots shown reveal who is missing and leads the viewer to believe that they are prime suspects:
-Carl says that Smithers left his jacket behind.
-Otto states that Skinner left his mother behind.
-Marge doesn't know the whereabouts of Bart, Lisa, Homer, and Grampa.
-Grampa's buried gun has been dug up in the front yard.
Grampa's gun is an old Smith and Wesson.
Mr. Burns is dressed as Jimbo Jones when he tries to convince Skinner to give the oil money to the nuclear plant.
The students and faculty make the following suggestions for spending the oil money:
- Groundskeeper Willie: Crystal bucket for his slop water, a brand new filthy blanket.
- Lunchlady Doris: A new staff
- Lisa: A jazz program for the music department with Tito Puente as the instructor.
- Ralph: Chocolate microscopes
- Otto: Double guitars
- Principal Skinner: More rubber stamps
- Bart: Bring the Three Stooges back to life. (This idea was rejected)
When Mr. Burns collapses onto the sundial, you can see the gun is missing from the holster inside his suit.
Mr. Burns is said to be 104 years old. This age is inconsistant throughout the series.
Barney: These fumes aren't as fun as beer. Sure, I'm all dizzy and nauseous, but where's the inflated sense of self-esteem?
(A man at the end of the bar slumps to the floor.)
Moe: Hey, if you guys are getting loaded off them fumes I'm gonna have to charge you.
(Two scientists walk into Moe's Tavern wearing gas-masks.)
Male Scientist: Man alive! There are, uh, men alive in here.
Female Scientist: (Holding a beeping detector) I'm detecting over twenty different toxins in the air.
(Barney belches and the detector beeps faster.)
Male Scientist: All right, everybody out! As long as Burns is pumping oil, this bar is closed!
Moe: Damned Burns. Let me just get one thing. (Pulls shotgun from behind the bar.)
Barney: Me too! (Pulls gun from his side.) Ah, now there's the inflated sense of self-esteem!
Captain McAllister: Arr...Burns, yer scurvy schemes have earned ye a one-way ticket to the boneyard.
Ned: Uh, I'd like to hear from Sideshow Mel.
Sideshow Mel: I'll see to it that Mr. Burns suffers the infernal mechanations of Hell's grim tyrant! (Holds up a switchblade)
(Burns has a gun under his jacket)
Mr. Burns: I decided to take the liberty of protecting myself after being attacked in my office by some unidentified assailant.
Homer: (off-screen) D'oh!
Bart: Yuck, what reeks?
Nelson: Smells like one of Van Houten's.
Milhouse: It does not!
Groundskeeper Willie: What in the name of St. Episiocritus?
Principal Skinner: (sniffs the air) Hmmm, the school doesn't normally smell so rank… (sniffs his armpit) Ahhh, wash basin fresh.
(Deleted Scene - After Homer screams the "F" word the phone rings and Homer picks it up)
Homer: Yes, Dad, that was me.
Burns: (stomping on model of Springfield) Take that Bowl-o-rama! Take that quickie store! Take that nuclear power plant... (pauses) Oh, fiddlesticks.
Smithers: This isn't some rival company you're battling with, sir; it's a school. People won't stand for it.
Mr. Burns: Pish posh. It will be like taking candy from a baby. (spots a baby with a candy cane) Say, that sounds like a larf… Let's give a try right now!
Mr. Burns: (unveiling his sun-blocking machine) Imagine it, Smithers… Electrical lights and heaters running all night long!
Smithers: But, sir! Every plant and tree will die, owls will deafen us with incessant hooting, the town's sun dial will be useless! I don't want any part of this project; it's unconscionably fiendish.
Mr. Burns: (startled at what Smithers says) I will not suffer your insubordination! There has been a shocking decline in the quality and quantity of your toadying, Waylon. And you will fall into line now!
Smithers: (irritably) No… No, Monty; I won't! Not until you step back from the brink of insanity.
Mr. Burns: I'll do no such thing. You're fired!
Mr. Burns: Ever since the beginning of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun. I shall do the next best thing: block it out.
(Skinner covers criticism of his school in newspaper's headline with his hand)
Superintendent Chalmers: What's that your hand's covering?
Principal Skinner: It's . . . an unrelated article.
Chalmers: An unrelated article in the middle of the front page headline?
Skinner: Uh, yes.
Chalmers: May I see it?
Smithers: Well, sir, all your major enemies have been destroyed: the school, the local tavern, the old folks' home. You must be very happy.
Mr. Burns: No, Smithers, I can't be truly happy, not as long as my greatest enemy still provides people with free light, heat, and energy. I call this enemy... the sun.
Mr. Burns: I want that oil. I've got a monopoly to maintain! I own the Electric Company and the Water Works, plus the hotel on Baltic Avenue!
Principal Skinner: That hotel's a dump and your monopoly is pathetic! The school's oil well is not for sale, particularly to a black-hearted scoundrel as yourself!
Mr. Burns: I see. Well, I guess I'll have to... attack you! (flails his arms like a sissy at Principal Skinner) I must have that oil! (pants for breath) Smithers... Smithers, help me subdue this beast!
Smithers: (walks in with a stapler) Sorry, sir. This was all I could find. (fires stapler at Principal Skinner) Take that! And that!
(The staples land harmlessly on Principal Skinner's desk.)
Principal Skinner: Please don't waste those.
Bart: (sees gun in cigar box) Wow!
Grampa: That's my old Smith and Wesson. If you're gonna play with it, be careful 'cause it's loaded.
Marge: (walks into the room) Aah! Bart! Guns are very dangerous and I won't allow them in this house! (takes gun away from Bart)
Grampa: How can you have a house without a gun?! What if a bear came in through the front door?
Marge: I'm going to bury this in the back yard where little hands can't get to it! (walks away)
Grampa: (to Bart) Geesh! You should have fired it into the air! Then she would have run off!
(At Town Hall)
Carl: That's odd; Mr. Smithers left his jacket here.
Otto: That's odd; Principal Skinner left his mother here.
Lisa: (on phone) Oh, no! That's awful, Mr. Puente! What? Oh, he owns the nuclear power plant. Yeah, I'd like to settle his ass, too! (hangs up the phone) Dad, how can you work for a man like Mr. Burns?
Homer: Well, he's not all bad, Lisa. He even sent me this nice 'Thank You' card.
(Lisa looks at the card.)
Lisa: (reading) "To Marge, Bart, Lisa, and Maggie". (gives card back to Homer) Dad, this doesn't have your name on it.
(Homer looks at the card and lowers it slowly; his pupils shrink in anger.)
Homer: Kids, would you step outside for a second?
(Bart and Lisa run outside as Homer stands up.)
Homer: (inhales deeply) F---!
(church organ plays a chord; birds fly away and everyone looks at the Simpson house.)
Ned: Dear Lord! That's the loudest profanity I've ever heard!
Principal Skinner: I'm afraid we have no legal recourse against Mr. Burns and his slant-drilling operation. The oil belongs to whoever pumped it first.
Groundskeeper Willie: What about all the expensive stuff we wanted? Can we still have it??
Principal Skinner: No!
(Groundskeeper Willie rips his shirt open and yells angrily, then begins to sob; the school staff begin to murmur.)
Groundskeeper Willie: (pounds fist on desk) Blast it!
Principal Skinner: In fact, to pay for the construction, operation, and demolition of our derrick, the school will have to eliminate all nonessential programs: music…
(Tito Puente gasps, then punches his bongos in angrily.)
Principal Skinner: …and maintenance.
Groundskeeper Willie: Aargh! (stands up) I'LL KILL THAT MR. BURNS!!! And, er, wound that Mr. Smithers! (storms out) Out of my way!
Mr. Burns: (after seeing Homer spray-painting all over his office) Who the devil are you?
(Homer loses it, then runs at Mr. Burns and grabs him by the neck, shaking him involuntarily.)
Homer: Homer Simpson!
Mr. Burns: What?
Homer: Homer Simpson!
Mr. Burns: What are you talking about?
Mr. Burns: You're not making sense, man!
Homer: Shut up! Homer Simpson!
Mr. Burns: I can't understand a word you're saying!
Homer: My name is Homer Simpson!
Mr. Burns: You're just babbling incoherently…
Homer: My name is Homer… (two guards rush in, restrain Homer, and drag him away) Oh, you're a dead man, Burns. Oh, you're dead. You're dead, Burns!
Smithers: (drunk) Mr. Burns was the closest thing I ever had to…a friend. But he fired me! So now I spend my days drinking cheap scotch and watching Comedy Central!
Dr. Hibbert: Oh, dear god!
Smithers: Eh, it's not all that bad… I never miss "Pardon My Zinger".
(Ned puts a blanket around Smithers.)
Groundskeeper Willie: Burns cost me my groundskeeping job at the school! And I'm too superstitious to take the one at the cemetery…
Grampa: Because of him, I lost my room, my things, and my buddy's collection of old sunbathing magazines.
Old Jewish Man: You bastard!
Moe: I lost my bar!
Barney: (pointing to Moe) I lost his bar!
Lisa: He robbed the school of music!
Principal Skinner: He robbed the school of financial security!
Tito Puente: He robbed the school of Tito!
Homer: He can't remember my name!
Marge: He's causing us all to yell!
(Maggie sucks on her pacifier angrily.)
Bart: Look what he did to my best friend!
(Everyone gasps and sees Milhouse eating a bag of cheese puffs messily.)
Bart: No; my dog!
(Everyone gasps again and sees Santa's Little Helper wheel into the building.)
Mr. Burns: Let me ask you something. Have you ever seen the sun set…at 3 p.m.?
Captain McAllister: Aye, once. When I was sailing 'round the arctic--
Mr. Burns: (interrupting) Shut up, you! (takes out a remote) Take one last look at the sun, Springfield!
A few hours after this episode had aired, a college student found out the identity of the shooter and posted his theory on the internet. The staff couldn't give him the prize in the "Who Shot Mr. Burns Contest" because they weren't allowed to contact him during the contest (as he hadn't entered) and afterwards, he couldn't be identified.
Blackboard Gag: This is not a clue...or is it?
Couch Gag: The family run across a repeating panning shot of the couch and TV.
Simon and Garfunkel
The 1966 song "59th St. Bridge Song (Feeling Groovy)," from Simon and Garfunkel, is referenced with slightly different lyrics. Mr. Burns sings, "Hello lamppost, whatcha knowin'? I've come to watch your power flowing." The original song is "flowers growing" instead of "power flowing".
The model of Springfield that comes out of Mr. Burns' floor is a reference to the 1964 James Bond movie, Goldfinger, when Goldfinger explains his plans to raid Fort Knox.
Mr. Burns: "I own the electric company, the water works, and that hotel on Baltic Avenue!"
These are all pieces on the board game "Monopoly." And Skinner's follow-up: "That hotel's a dump", is correct. Baltic Avenue is the cheapest property on the board.
The whole idea of this episode is a spoof on the 1991 episode of Dallas entitled: "Conundrum (1)." The character, J.R., is shot and the episode ends as a cliffhanger. The catchphrase "Who Shot J.R.?" was used all summer. This is where the episode title "Who Shot Mr. Burns?" alludes from. There were also many other elements of the story which are similar to the ones found in the classic TV series Dallas: Mr. Burns gets everyone angry by stealing the school's oil, as JR gets people angry by shutting down someone else's oil field to make his own. Smithers is afraid that he shot Mr. Burns in a drunken stupor, like Sue Ellen was. Homer's fingerprints were found on the gun, like Sue Ellen's were, and the search is narrowed down to someone close to the Ewing family, like it was with the Simpson family. Also, Smithers' dream sequence in which Mr. Burns is in the shower is taken from an episode much later in the Dallas series where Bobby is brought back from the dead and the entire previous season turned out to be a dream.
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