The Sopranos Season 1 Episode 13

Jimmy: Do I have enough cologne on?
Christopher: You smell like Paco Rabane crawled up your ass and died.

Carmela: (to Father Phil) I think you have this M.O. where you manipulate spiritually thirsty women, and I think a lot of it is tied up with food somehow, as well as the sexual tension game.

Artie: (on Tony) I don't just hate this man, I hate all men.

Tony: (to Dr. Melfi) Don't be stupid, even in the short term.

Paulie: The Skip seeing a psychiatrist, how does that sit with your ass?
Silvio: I usually do sit with my ass. Why don't you sit with yours?

Tony: Why did I buy a fucking off-road vehicle?
A.J.: To waste petrochemical resources.

Tony: (to Dr. Melfi) We've got bigger things to talk about than Jeannie Cusamano's ass.

Carmela: You know what I think Father, I think that you like the-I don't know what to call it-the whiff of sexuality that never goes anyplace.

Dr. Melfi: What am I supposed to do?
Tony: Leave town today, right now. As a matter of fact I'm going to get some guys here to stay with you until you get on a plane.
Dr. Melfi: I can't just do that, lam it! I have a life. I have patients.
Tony: Well you tell them August came early this year.
Dr. Melfi: It doesn't work that way. I have patients who are suicidal.
Tony: Well they're not going to feel any better about their life if you get clipped.

Tony: What kind of person can I be where his own mother wants him dead?

Dr. Melfi: It's been a long odyssey with your mother.
Tony: Yeah, these last 500 years just seem to race by.

Christopher: Russian booboos, you go for some basic foreplay, they'll detail your car.