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The Vampire Diaries S05E01: "I Know What You Did Last Summer"

Time is the pink slime of the universe. It's haunted and dangerous; it'll move real quickly all of the sudden and then slow down to a sludgy dribble just for kicks. Time will kiss you on the lips and then push you into a mud puddle. Time is disgusting basically. Look at what it's done to us! We used to be so young. We had the whole world ahead of us. And now here we are, adjusting our wigs and applying arthritis cream to our barkin' dogs and raising up our motorized hospital beds in the old folks home so that we can watch Season 5 of The Vampire Diaries. FIVE. FIVE SEASONS of The Vampire Diaries. What. Is. HAPPENING? How is this possible? This show has been on for five seasons? But you know what, hush your mouth. The Vampire Diaries deserves one thousand seasons, so in the scheme of things maybe five years is not that many. See what I did there? Tricked you again, Time, you ridiculous trollop. We are young still and so are all the monsters of Mystic Falls.

Quick question: Do you remember Season 4? It's okay if you don't, because A LOT went down. Here's the gist: Elena became a vampire and then Jeremy's shirt fell off and Elena burned down her house and an evil wizard locked Stefan in a box and pushed him off a cliff and then Jasmine Guy ran in and shouted at Bonnie and also Klaus cut off someone's head using a hat. It was a great season overall, I enjoyed it. But guess what? This week's Season 5 premiere takes place months and months after all that stuff, so the characters are mostly over it. If there's one thing these kids are good at, it's experiencing repeated, overwhelming devastation only to immediately feel safe again forever. But here's the catch this time around: Danger is BACK. 

"I Know What You Did Last Summer" was named in memory of a time before Kevin Williamson decided to write a comedy show on Fox, but the nostalgic horror reference probably wasn't a coincidence. This season premiere felt very much like a throwback to how TVD started. New kids in new environments. A clean-ish slate. By that, of course, I mean COLLEGE. Yep, two vampires and a ghost are now going to college, but don't worry: Whereas most high school TV shows barely ever survive the transition into college years, you can rest assured these kids will still never, ever go to class or read books. This is still the same classic formula of never-ending nightmare scenarios punctuated by the occasional towel scene.

Friends, "I Know What You Did Last Summer" was a very good and fun episode. Let's talk about it a ton.

In what must've been a joking reference to the voiceovers that used to begin each episode, Elena "wrote" a letter to Bonnie explaining what everyone had been up to all summer. "Wrote" might not be the correct word because I'm pretty sure she used Siri or Dragon to just dictate this letter because her hands and fingers were busy having SO MUCH SEX with Damon.

Which, fair enough. Also a Vampire Weekend song was playing during this part haha very funny guys. More like Vampire FREAK-end. That is a perfect pun I just thought of, do you like it? Anyway, Elena and Damon weren't the only ones mashing their sensitive areas together.

Somewhere in Europe Rebekah was making out with some random lady while Matt pretended he was turned on and not terrified. Uh can I ask a controversial question? Has there been a legit same-sex kiss on this show before? I guess this is progress then. But anyway, look at Matt and Rebekah sexin' everyone in Europe! Proud of u guys. You earned it.

Oh and the sad poignant fact about Elena's letter to Bonnie was that Bonnie was hella dead and Elena didn't know that. Apparently in order to keep up the charade that she was still alive, Bonnie was forcing Jeremy to send emails on her cell phone and I guess procure and mail postcards from around the globe. Honestly felt so bad for Jeremy here. Scram, you bossy phantasm. Let Jeremy enjoy this presumably brief stint as a living person!

Um, I was NOT prepared for Teen Runaway Katherine. I mean, we knew exciting things were in store for Katherine when Elena crammed the vampire cure down her throat, but the sight of her bobbing and weaving all crazily on an empty sidewalk was straight-up amazing. We were only seconds into Season 5 and it's already going to be the best. This Katherine is everything.

But the biggest question mark was what had become of Stefan ever since a suicidal warlock locked him in a safe and rolled him into a quarry. 

Damon and Elena seemed to think he was on vacation or something, but the truth was MUCH wetter.

Yikes. That is not the best way to spend a summer in my opinion. And I should know because one time I spent a summer working concessions at a movie theater while wearing a bowtie. Stefan's situation seemed worse than even that.

Okay, so the main story finally got rolling on the morning of Elena's first day of college. It would also be Jeremy's first day back at high school, which promised to be awkward considering everyone still thought he was dead and they all went to his funeral and also his house had burned down and his XBox melted. But Damon was being a super good boyfriend and offered to let Jeremy stay at the Salvatore shanty, a situation that will probably prove to be very beneficial to both Jeremy and also to slash-fic writers. (Links pls)

It made me laugh how such a big deal was made about Whitmore College being a few hours away from Mystic Falls. This is a show where people take day trips to Nova Scotia like it's no big deal, so yeah, I'm pretty sure Elena and Damon will still get to hang out & sex each other pretty regularly.

I loved this part when Caroline and Elena were carrying their belongings on move-in day already having a great time as college ladies, and then some ghost creeped up on them.

This was probably the cruelest joke the writers have ever played. Bonnie was now a GHOST who is legit invisible to almost all of the characters yet this changed NOTHING about her role on the show. Elena and Caroline simply did not give a shit about where she was at that moment and Bonnie just sort of had to pretend she was part of the gang. Man, just brutal. I mean we have seen Bonnie deal with self-esteem issues in the past, but this was just deranged. To you or me this would be an existential nightmare, but for Bonnie it was just another day.

Um, look at Caroline and Elena's dorm room. Maybe it's because I went to a state university but my freshman dorm was basically a prison cell with two sets of bunkbeds and a window that didn't open. LOOK AT THIS ROOM. It has no fewer than THREE hanging lights, one wall sconce, a sitting area, a private bathroom (with sauna?) and vaulted ceilings? Just how many incoming freshman is Whitmore housing with this kind of luxury? Couldn't be more than 7 or 8 right? I'm sure the enrollment is pretty underwhelming due to the murder rate, but still. This room was enormous and Caroline still found ways to repeatedly complain about not having enough personal space.

But anyway, what do two vampire co-eds do to celebrate their first day of college? Toast blood bags, obviously. But just as they were about to dig into their delicious vampire Capri-Suns, in walked, get this: A THIRD ROOMMATE.

I loved how shocked and openly angry Elena and Caroline were about this intruder. Uh, first of all, did you count the beds on your way in?

I will admit something right now: I liked the new roommate character. She seemed smart and peppy and distinctive, unlike that disastrous April situation from last season. April was not mentioned in this episode, but hopefully she'll be brought back for a murder because get out of here, April. That being said, she was great in Teen Beach Movie, a very good & important film. (I'm writing this from jail.)

But right off the bat, the new roommate showed definite signs of being a creep. For instance, just look at what she was using for a computer. "I want a laptop but it should be way too weak to use for anything important and also it must have a floppy keyboard. And a kickstand." Still though, this was exciting because it was our first product placement of the season! In some ways this was the true beginning of TVD Season 5.

It had only been a few hours since they parted ways but Elena was already calling up Damon to vent about college life. That's when Damon found THIS beauty loitering in his parlor:

Oh Katherine, Sweet Katherine. Look at her. The Platonic Ideal. This is the kind of lady people write classical poetry about. There is officially nothing about Katherine that ISN'T inspiring. To see her is to be cleansed. To hear her is to be absolved. For she is Grace. Entire religions have been inspired by less impressive beings than this lady. Fresher than morning dew, wiser than Mother Gaia. If Katherine were a novel it would be written by Toni Morrison and its title would be Katherine but people would only ever whisper it. Elegance, thy name is Katherine Pierce. KATHERINE!!

In case you forgot, Mystic Falls is still f*cking weird. Look at these weirdos, having a townwide party because the summer is over? Uh, most of you die every time there is a townwide party, maybe chill with the townwide parties in general? But also, don't you dare tell me the summer ending is a good thing. Don't even. Do not. Orange leaves do NOT make up for an absent sun.

Like, look at these two. They don't even care that summer's ending because they ARE summer. Honestly, this was a lot of beige on beige, but it's fine. 

The main thing was these crazy kids were very horny for each other but Rebekah wanted Matt to remember that it's a loveless f*ckfest and nothing more because she is a lady like that. But in my opinion she totally loves him and was probably dreading having to go to some swampy hellhole soon so she was trying to mentally disengage. By the way, if Matt's smile at the end didn't make you feel things in your heartbones then throw away those heartbones!!

Ouch my heart is so warm TOO warm. I am rooting for them. That's how I know they're headed for disaster.

Speaking of which:

Haha Silas! Silas was so different from Stefan it was like he wasn't even trying. For one thing, his hair wasn't as nice and also he wore a baggy shirt which Stefan would NEVER do. But also he brazenly drank the Sheriff's blood while she was trying to eat her french fries? 

Oh and then he drank her blood out of a styrofoam cup! Guys if you didn't know this already, listen to me: Drinking someone's blood out of a styrofoam cup is basically the most disrespectful thing you can do. It is the ultimate insult. Like, sure, cut open someone's arm in broad daylight and steal their blood, but those things can still be done with respect. The second a styrofoam cup comes into play you are basically calling that person trash. So for the record, Silas: Is immortal; drinks human blood; is NOT a vampire; is the original doppelganger of Stefan; is hella psychic; and, most importantly, considers Sheriff Forbes to be capital-T TRASH. 

Speaking of disrespect, it was like a Haters Holiday out there. Look at what somebody did to Jeremy's phone!

Jeremy got bullied at school because he'd died and come back to life. Nothing makes a bully's blood boil more than that, so yeah, Jeremy deserved it. He brought it on himself, let's be real. Still though, NOBODY slaps a man's cell phone out of his hand and kicks it across a hallway. So Jeremy had no choice but to go full Zangief on those dudes.

I mean it was probably foolish for anyone to mess with this sweet-faced hulk. Lesson learned, bozos!

Katherine the Perfect Human Being was drinking all of Damon's brown fluids because let's face it, being alive is a nightmare. But as entertaining as Katherine's teenage Lucille Bluth routine was, even Damon could see that Katherine was not handling her new heartbeat very well.

I loved this little moment: Katherine had spent upwards of half a millennium pissing folks off, so now she was on the run from all her haters. She admitted it, she was scared, she needed Damon's help. And the fact is, they DID have a history. She MADE him. And even though she was concerned that she could not become a vampire again (the process might kill her forever), she appealed to his common decency. And it worked. Because duh.

This was another really clever piece of writing: For months Stefan was literally dying over and over again. Each time he'd die he hallucinated some sort of afterlife full of lens flares and bossy advice. 

Specifically, Dream Damon was forcefully suggesting to Stefan that he flip his humanity switch back off (Hello Ripper Stefan!) so that he could not feel so much anguish about having to be in a wet box all the time.

It was clear that Stefan wasn't totally on board with that thought as he'd spent entire SEASONS being a jerk-murderer and didn't seem interested in doing that again. On the other hand, the habitual drownings didn't seem very fun either. It was a tough call.

Back in the world's most luxurious dorm room, Caroline was throwing a fit about having to have a new roommate, so she rifled through the roommate's unmentionables and then drank her Protein Water to make a point or something. But the Protein Water burned her insides all up because there was vervain in it!

So suddenly Caroline and Elena came to suspect that maybe their roommate was hiding something from them. Specifically, she maybe probably knew they were vampires. But in my opinion maybe most people in this world were sick of being assaulted and mentally molested by blood-sucking demons? Yeah, the new roommate had the most devious agenda of all: Not being murdered at college.

So anyway, Caroline was FREAKING out man, and Elena tried to convince her to relax and play it cool. And that's what brought us to maybe the #1 best and most instantly iconic Elena moment of all time?

Hahahaha! In mere seconds she went from a classic Elena frown to a double-shoulder party shimmy? Astonishing. And perfect. And the best. Dobrev 4 Prez.

Aaaand I'm still laughing. Elena and Caroline tried to attend a frat party (or whatever) and couldn't get in because of vampire laws!

Then their roommate saw them but didn't invite them in (which, would that even work? Doesn't it need to be the homeowner?) and they were doubly convinced she was some kind of anti-vampire bigot.

Except then they tried to call her and when they put the roommate on speakerphone, it turned out the roommate was right in the middle of getting murdered! 

Yeah, sorry girl. We don't yet know what your deal was, but rest assured that as far as the campus police were concerned, you died of suicide and not those obvious vampire bites on your neck. A noble death, in other words. Meanwhile Elena snaked the dead girl's cell phone and found a picture of her adoptive father on it. I don't know either, don't ask.

So then Silas finally wandered into Mystic Grill and creepily read Damon's mind about where Katherine was.

Then on his way out Silas grabbed Jeremy's shoulder and Jeremy IMMEDIATELY knew something was up.

I guess the ghost of Jeremy's tattoo was VERY sensitive when it came to immortal villains, plus Bonnie was still loitering nearby straight-up admitting what a failure her magic had been in destroying Silas. Like, we know, Bonnie. Don't worry, we know. But honestly, I'm so glad that this Silas charade didn't last too long. Basically everyone now knew that Silas was back, and a bathing Katherine was about to find out too.

But vampire or not, Katherine will STILL cut a bozo with a straight razor!

So now it was very clear that Silas had some deadly intentions when it came to Katherine. I'm guessing he was still all steamed that she'd taken the cure because HE had wanted to take it so that he could commit suicide. (Weirdest Big Bad master plan ever?) So maybe he wanted to drink 100% of her blood and maybe absorb some of that cure juice? I don't know. 

But it wasn't as though Silas was fully owning up to his plan just yet. This was only the season premiere, after all! Silas is not only the original immortal, he's also very story-savvy.

To keep Katherine protected from Silas, Damon had Jeremy go drive her away to safety.

It didn't go very well! Okay the truth is, Silas basically bargained for Damon to turn over Katherine and Damon got all cold-blooded about it and tried to get Jeremy to bring her back. But Katherine is a scrapper and would NOT allow that. So suddenly Jeremy's car was wrapped around a pole and they were both dying in the street. It happens.

Oh and look who showed up in Mystic Falls for some reason: That sexy brunette lady from Matt and Rebekah's European three-way! She had apparently stolen a bunch of their things and the word "gypsy" wasn't used because that would be racist, but she was a thieving gypsy basically. BUT she had personally brought Matt back his immortality ring, which he gladly accepted without question.

But then some dude creeped up behind him and grabbed the back of his head and chanted!

Matt's a demon now, I think? I don't know, ask a gypsy. (Do NOT ask a gypsy.)

So then Jeremy was dying for his eighth or ninth time and Katherine didn't give a hoot.

Bonnie dropped by to, I guess, cry for a bit and then immediately rush back to town square so that she could listen to some dumb speech her dad was making about Bonnie being on a road trip or whatever. Girl's got priorities.

But luckily Damon showed up and, in a bizarro mirror flip of that time he once murdered Jeremy, he instead saved Jeremy's life! 

And not only that, but seemed genuinely shaken to find Jeremy in such a bad state. Now, was this because he was so concerned about Elena's feelings or because he'd grown to actually love Jeremy as a friend or brother figure? That's for the slash-fic authors to decide. (Link pls)

Meanwhile just when the night couldn't have gotten any worse, Caroline got a voicemail from Tyler who had been spending all summer chillin' with werewolves in the Appalachians and had decided not to go to college after all. This always happens: You're on top of the world because you have TWO love interests fighting over you, and then suddenly you have zero love interests fighting over you. Caroline was SAD. But at least the third roommate was brutally murdered, so that ought to cheer her up right?

This was pretty nice. Just when it looked like Stefan was about to give in to Hallucination Damon's suggestions to become a monster again, Hallucination Elena showed up to talk him out of it.

That's right Stelena fans, this was a big "HANG IN THERE" moment for you guys too. Stefan was clearly going to be using Elena as his constant, which portends a renewed romantic vigor once he busts out of this safe. I think? I don't know what half of those words meant but it felt right. Stefan's hard for Elena again, and it was very touching to see him look all dewy-eyed behind those blinding lens flares, you know?

So then just as Bonnie's dad Mr. Mayor was talking about how proud he was of his daughter for, I don't know, living out of her car now, Silas interrupted and started yelling at everybody.

And he bragged that because he'd shotgunned so much blood over the summer he was now very good at mass mind control. So sure enough, everybody froze in place just like he'd asked! And that's when this happened:

Rude, Silas. V, v rude. But he wasn't done being a major jerk. THEN he had the audacity to brainwash the entire town into hunting down Katherine for him!

Which, haha, that's hilarious that he had to first explain to them that this person in question was the doppelganger of Elena and NOT the actual Elena. Yeah, cool, understandable. Guy, you are an immortal wizard. Do your own chores.

I am not going to lie, my favorite thing about this episode was just seeing all these people again. It made me so happy! And I like the mysterious college shenanigans, and just plum having a new environment to explore. I'm not sure how much I care about the Silas stuff, but as long as Katherine is in danger, consider my pulse POUNDING. "I Know What You Did Last Summer" was a really fun hour and proper evidence that this series is still running as strong as ever. Yes we are all much older now and are all hurtling toward the grave at this point, but as long as TVD remains on the air, it will be the best wind-down ever. Welcome back, show!

*lowers motorized hospital bed*

Please leave.


QUESTIONS:

... Will Stefan be mad when he finds out how sloppy Silas has been looking?

... Is Matt a demon now?

... Will Jeremy join in the next time Damon does a household underwear dance? (Link pls)

... Is Whitmore the DeVry of Virginia?

Previously Aired Episode

AIRED ON 4/29/2016

Season 7 : Episode 20

Next Episode

AIRS ON 5/6/2016

Season 7 : Episode 21

329 Comments
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price thanks god you are back...im just catching on with tvd ,,,and its looking good so far ...i hope to get older reading your recaps...
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Thank God you're back to recaps! I almost stopped watching last spring bc you stopped recapping. <3
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Price!!! Your back!!!! So good to laugh with you again. Love our <3TVD<3 right?
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PRICEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <333333
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Also that opening scene with Damon and Elena having sex reminded me of Sims' sex.
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TVD is fucking awful now. And OF COURSE they killed off Bonnie's dad! Black guys don't survive long on this show.

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Matter of fact, he has survived a hell of a lot more time than other white characters that have been killed off. But of course. White after white character dies, but as soon as a black character dies (5 SEASONS IN!) "Oh my God! Racism! Racism everywhere!
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please shut up....
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I keep watching this show because of the characters that I used to like but now it's all about who's banging whom. And also by the end of the season 10 we're gonna have doppelgangers of every character ever. Please stop, TVD. Please go back to season 1 & 2 TVD, please!
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I loved the way you easily turn TVD into a comedy of enormous proportions, I mean I get it two jokes or three unintentional laughs, but heck you made me realize writers can easily become bore with their own creations, and start saying random BS. That aside I would love to hear more serious notes from you, but heck if comedy is your thing I will make sure to come back and have another laugh after watching the episode, I get the vibe you wont leave anyone on the safe side this season, cheers

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I am just so glad you are back for this Price.
This is gonna make the winter so much better !
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So I was so excited when Price Peterson gifted us with Teen Wolf recaps. I did actual dances. It was exhilarating... but just a little dangerous, a cruel promise. Hope stirred, then awoke...

The TW recaps were joy. But when the pleasure had faded there always lingered on the faint but unmistakable taint of longing. Bitter on the tongue.

So, when browsing tv.com last week - peering through the weary fog of exhaustion and disappointment which habitually surrounded me everywhere - which I had slowly, over months come to accept as the natural condition of my existence - I saw a thumbnail of Nina Dobrev arrested in a perfect mid silly-face and an all caps caption in the corner...

It was enough. I knew. He was really BACK.

Did you hear that? That click. That was the rare sound of a piece of the world slotting very gently back... into perfect place.

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I know most people do not like bonnie but I love her and want to know what's going on with her story line!
I also want MORE KATHERINE/ Jeremy <3
I also like Jeremy / Damon's relationship. its going to be so akward when Stefan comes back... :/
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When I saw the dorm room, I immediately thought, "that is definitely a typical dorm room." And then I thought, "what would Price Peterson have to say about this?"
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Price...welcome back! I love TVD on it's own, but you bring a special something w/your weekly photo-recaps that just solidifies my love for this show.
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PLEASE STOP THE MADNESS!!!!!!!!!!
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YAY! Price, not much in life makes me laugh out loud so predictably, but your TVD recaps do! Welcome back. TVD is my chronic guilty pleasure and you, sir, get just how ridiculous it is (and how delicious)!
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Thank you Price! As always reading your review is the best part of this show !
It's really nice to see Elena and Damon together, each of them handling drama on his own without the drama interfering in their relationship...
Bonnie was just useless... and now that they can go to New Orleans to get some witch I don't think they need her...
Silas is a good badie, let's see how writers keep up with him...
I actually thought that the dorm room was small but that's because I'm not American...
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Did anyone else notice that Elena had no contact photos on her phone? Guess that is what happens when you and all your contacts are vampires! Haha ....nice touch TVD
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She had Kol, Klaus and Bekah!!
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Price, you're back!! Now watching TVD will be more fun with your recaps.
The season 5 premiere was awesome! I loved everything about it. From Paul's incredible role as Silas, Nina's shrugging scene (Yup, I agree. It was #1 best and most instantly iconic Elena moment of all time) and of course Katherine for the win!!

The final scene was just incredible. Silas is badass! I have high hope for this season. Welcome back TVD.
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Awesome review... so well written...and I love how thorough you are. The effort is clear and the humor... love the humor...

When i saw the dorm room, my eyes widened. I WISH i had a dorm room close to that size...

I also love the Katherine angle. My theory is that Silas needs to kill Katherine because only a doppleganger can kill him? Maybe? I mean... if Silas was really immortal, then why the need to kill Katherine in particular? No, there's an agenda... and i believe she's his vulnerability. If i was immortal, or very close to it, i make sure all my loose ends were tied up, including removing my vulnerabilities.
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Hi, Price. (<3 u bby)

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Okay, season 4 may have sucked butt majorly, but you have to admit this was a promising season premiere. Right? Had a season 2 feeling to it, the best season of all.
I have faith. Some.
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Good Job trying to formulate a healthy relationship between Jeremy and Damon, writers...
When Damon is yelling at Jeremy for being expelled:

Jeremy: "Coming from the guy who killed me!"
Damon: "Yeah, but that was in the privacy of your own home, not out in the open!"
.....
No words.
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Spend the whole summer thinking about how long Damon Needs to discover that "Stefan" isn't Stefan. Now Silas didn't even try, so I'm a little bit disappointed. On the other hand, I really like Silas/Stefan this way, like "I don't give a fuck" and can't wait to discover what's the deal between him and Katherine! But wtf is it with "whats her name" and her Vampire related death?? BTW really liked the "brother bonding" between Jer and Damon!
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Oh, Price, can we be besties please??? Your recaps make all the episodes seem funnier and all my days seem better
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I think they should spare the girls hairstyles and make them wear different coloured crocs. Dopplegangar, schmoplleganger - apparently I can't spell it either Damian. ;)
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Mr. Peterson don't ever leave us again! I come here to be entertained, and you have done just that. I thoroughly enjoyed the bit about the gypsy, "I lifted your junk." (Really Price, Really?)and "Matt's a demon now, I think? I don't know, ask a gypsy. (Do NOT ask a gypsy.)" (Because i would have ask) My favorite," But vampire or not, Katherine will STILL cut a bozo with a straight razor!......But Katherine is a scrapper....."
P.S. You don't think you a little harsh when it pertains to Bonnie?
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Yeah don't ask a gypsy, cover him in holy water, put salt in his mouth or to be sure ask a Winchester ;)
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Oh Price, just marry me? K thankyou bye!
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Oh Price, how I've missed you and these recaps!
  • "This was probably the cruelest joke the writers have ever played. Bonnie was now a GHOST who is legit invisible to almost all of the characters yet this changed NOTHING about her role on the show. Elena and Caroline simply did not give a shit about where she was at that moment and Bonnie just sort of had to pretend she was part of the gang. Man, just brutal. I mean we have seen Bonnie deal with self-esteem issues in the past, but this was just deranged. To you or me this would be an existential nightmare, but for Bonnie it was just another day." NAILED it! I mean Bonnie is litrally invisible now. After seasons of being treated like she was invisible unless they needed a way to write themselves out of a corner or something, she is literally invisible now. After seasons of her "friends" treating her like crap and using her w/o really giving a damn about her, they made her freaking invisible. The only ones who know she's dead are Stefan (who is a little preoccupied) and Jeremy who is abding by her wishes. Weird thing is, they now know that Silas is alive and ready to wreak havoc and it hasn't crossed their minds that the reason for that is possible that their beloved witch is dead. Seriously?! I felt like Bonnie made some strieds last season but this...this is just sad. It's so unnecessarily cruel and sad and it pisses me off. She and Jeremy can't even touch each ohter. Didn't he used to be able to touch Anna? Like WTF?!
  • Umm Jer went from a lanky stoner sophmore to this jacked up badass. Do these kids not see the boulders he has for shoulders? I wouldn't have picked on him for anything in the world. He can break a dude with the flick of his wrist. I never understand kids bullying scary people, because self-preservation would sugges that you avoid the scary kid, not tease him mercilessly until you end up in a bloody heap on the floor. Seriously, between that scene and everything with Danny Desai on Twisted, I'm wondering about teens today.
  • I have always loved the weird bro thing that Damon and Jer have, I mean if you exclude that minor snapping Jeremy's neck thing, they've had a pretty consisstient, very reluctant, brother type of vibe. I look forward to these living arrangements, this should be fun.
  • No mention of Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome Price? Shame on you! I for one got a little spark of happiness at how TVD got it's diversity on. Even though the Asian roomate totally died first. Typical. I mean hot guy has the hots for Caroline, loved the quirky new roommate whose greatest offense was not wanting to have her blood sucked, and hell Nina Dobrev worked up a hell of a tan was getting her racially ambiguous on. I ain't mad at you chica!
  • Oh Caroline, you were so hung up on Tyler and so busy trying to cocktease Klaus wit no intentions of following through and now you don't have either of them. Seriously, Caroline should have jumped on board with Klaus in NOLA. Never fear, hot guys are plentiful.
  • Kathherine was looking rough and I loved it. She still has all the sass but she's infinitely more vulnerable than ever. Such a bitchy move to leave Jer laying in the street dying.
  • I loved the Stefan dreams. That has to suck. He's been drowing over and over again for three months. The visions were fitting though, the two most important people presently in his life acting as the respective angel and devel on his shoulder, both with the genuine intentions of helping him survive it. I'm curious as to how Elena will sense/feel Stefan being in trouble or in pain next week though. How does that happen?
  • Paul W. is havng so much fun being evil and he sells it so hard, that I have so much fun wtaching him be all evil. I love it. Silas was just wreaking all sorts of havoc. Like, why couln't he have just pretended to be Katherine, slept with her, and then drained her dry? Too easy. Now he's got this whole world domination thing going on, and by world, I mean Mystic Falls of course. He's just being evil for the sake of being evil, as was the case with killing Bonnie's father. I love it when evil has a Stefan face. :)
  • I swear I never have any of these problems or any of this type of fun with my dopplegangers.

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Yes, the point about the characters not putting two and two together when they figured out Silas is back... Especially Damon. They all knew last season she did a spell on him and they didn't even hint at Bonnie being dead? It's cruel. I wonder how long the writers will drag this out...
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I thought this episode was fantastic! I love this show and so glad it's back on! The review was great and glad u enjoyed it as much as me!
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Is it just me or the "leaflet boy" was eerily look-alike of Marcel, the vampire left in charge of New Orleans By Nick?
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Because we all look alike right?

LOL! I'm kidding. Maybe a lil bit.
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I was just thinking (because thinking is all I can do while I'm too lazy to check the list of mentioned characters:) that there WAS a vampire on campus who offed nerdy Megan. SO maybe, just maybe it's him? :)
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Ha! Look, as long as Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome isn't a witch...or, warlock rather, I'm game. ;) Yeah, I notice a pattern because it did kinda have this weird resemblance to both Marcel and that other black guy that Caroline ate that time.
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Bleu people all look alike?? I honestly never noticed before...wait. you're just 'effin around, right?



:P
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I'd like to think that we're distinctive by our shades, I mean, honestly my shade of bleu changes depending on my mood. Now those purple people...not so colorul. I mean options are limited to Barney. :P

Obviously. ;)
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You can never go wrong with turquoise. ;)
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Sadly, I feel like pink most of the time and there is no one to refer to but... Pink Panther! Oh my Gosh! But I shall try to recalibrate myslef to shades of turquise :)
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> this was exciting because it was our first product placement

Well... I saw several HTC One moments before the tablet got screentime, but I'm on board if you don't consider that product placement. It's just really the only phone anyone with a new phone should have right now. It's that good.

Really enjoyed the episode and recap. So glad you're doing these again, Price!
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I thought the episode was so-so. It was lacking in a cohesive element, which I guess is typical of a 5th-season show like this. There are SO many balls in the air at the end of last season that in the premiere they can only touch on each one, resulting in a somewhat scattered episode. It's gonna be a long season, folks. How much can they get right?

By far the best and most awesome surprise of the season premiere was the return of Price. Honestly, for probably a significant portion of the TVD-viewership, Price is the equivalent to a beloved regular character. (But you know.... REAL) His "exit" last season was shocking and heartbreaking. The return of Price is like the the S4-ending return of Lexi and Alaric. Something so RIGHT, so inevitable, so ABSOLUTELY FREAKING FANTASTIC! (hope all is well in your non-TV.com/TVD world Price)

Oh TVD, you give the best gifts. Price, seriously, Julie and Kevin should put you on salary. You are everything and a box of Snickers. ;)
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So glad you're back Price TVD is never the same without you. As premiers go this was ok. I'm not a fan of Silas, a big bad that can read minds and is hard to kill can get boring real quick.
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Hurrah, Price is back! Was so sad last season when he went away. Missed you bb, I love a man who makes me choke on whatever beverage I have from laughing so hard.
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Great episode. Expected it to be worse. Looks like it could be a better season than season 4!

And welcome back, Price! I love your recaps! :)
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PRICE IS BAAAAACK!!!
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oh price !! you are back-I haven't seen this episode yet but I had to comment how happy I am to see you...haven't been the same without your recap!!! HUGS!
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YAY! Price! You're back! I knew I was laughing too hard for it to be anyone else.
So glad :)
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Welcome back Price!!! love and missed your VD reviews. I.I.F.Y. cuz i cant wait to read your next review.
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No Klaus = :(
Bonnie still a character = :(
Matt's story line = meh
Jeremy: lack of nudity = :((
The Love Triangle = do not really care about it that much but was OK
Silas/possible evil Stefan = I am a fan <3
the college set-up = :)
Elena's/Caroline's shenanigans = :))
Katherine: just deserts = :D
-----------------------------------------
Overall = I am just so glad the show is on again, can't wait for the next episodes! It certainly will help me with me being in stage 3 -Bargaining- of Teen Wolf withdrawal.
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You know that the Originals is on tv. Right. Loads of Klaus there. Every week, for an hour :)
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Yeah but one of my favorite things about the show was Klaus. This show will not be the same, I am sure.
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Oh, Price!! Thank goodness that you are back!! I missed your fun photo recaps... Please don't ever go away again!! As for the first VD episode, I am so glad that we are back for season 5. Not sure what we face during this season, but I will be front and center the whole way. And I will be waiting each Friday for you to post the funniest recaps!! Keep up the great work..
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Price thank you for coming back and doing the recap, the world makes sense once again. Love the recap and enjoyed the episode. It also seems Jeremy's wardrobe department has been busy with finding tight fitting tops! *Thank you VD wardrobe department!* :D
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Little bit confused about what's going on but change is refreshing and of course Katherine is AMAZING! :D

Same feeling when I saw her tablet; The Vampire Diaries even has the best covered advertising! ;)
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Loved the recap! There were a few things I didn't like about the episode, one of which was some of the writing of the dialogue (characters pointing out the obvious left right and center!). But the biggest problem for me was that short Rebekah/Matt/Nadia scene. It felt very disrespectful for the first non het kiss to be in that kind of setting, playing it off more as something two women do to entertain men instead of treating it with the seriousness and respect it deserves. But that's just me.

On the plus side, I think Paul's acting was incredible this episode. He's really shining as Silas, I think he might be enjoying getting to play cheeky and sarcastic evil instead of mangst!evil that was Rippah Stefan.
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Unfortunately he's never had too much to work with as Stefan, so the opportunity for him to sink his teeth (excuse the pun) into a much more enigmatic role seems to be one he is relishing in quite well,
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It´s still hard to watch without Klaus :( and OMG, Stilas look made it so obvious that he wasn´t Stefan!!! But we know our beloved characters never realize anything at all :P

http://corleonesandlannisters.wordpress.com/
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it's all about the hair,... katherine's awesome hair,... and now silas's not so awesome hair,... self shaddows and all,...
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I agree... The Originals became an important part of it and now, they just got ripped out of the show :O
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I swore I would give this show up after enduring the grating 2nd half of season 4 without Price's photo recaps, but for some reason I came back. This episode was actually good and Price's recap was as funny as ever.
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Good beginning to the season and great return from Price.
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"I Lifted ur junk" Omg the pun on that, hahahahahahhahaha, I cant-Im just, ohhh tooo funny lol, also loved the elena party gif, and Caroline "I love college" while sobbing her eyes out lol. Welcome back Price, THE BEST!!!!
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I hate this show now. But I have to watch it because I will NOT give up my weekly PP recap! Damn you Price!
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Welcome to the club!

We have cookies! <3
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Yep...same here. I'll have one of those delicious cookies! Thank you Club!
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Do vampires actually drown or just get bloated with water in Stephan's case? And it's weird to have Bonnie going to college like normal. Strange why vamps and ghost need another higher education when they could be vamping it up elsewhere. All in all, just good fun watching TVD again.
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