Hank Venture/The Monarch
The Phantom Limb, Judge
Dr. Thaddius S. "Rusty" Venture
Tiny Attorney, Monarch Henchman #2, Guards #1 and #2, Watch, Bailiff
Dr. Byron Orpheus
Tiny Attorney: So... mind-reader... fascinating, could you read the mind of... say for instance... The Monarch?
Dr. Orpheus: If it would please the court.
The Monarch: Objection, no way!
Judge: T-t-t-this is most unorthodox.
Dr. Venture: Unorthodox! The defendant is in a crown for God's sake.
The Monarch: Tears!? Come on! You know that sick deformed freak! You know he was pounding his invisible meat!
Dr. Venture: Your honor, I have children here! I don't want them listening to this potty talk!
Judge: Order! I want that comment struck from the record. And my mind.
Henchman: What about the necromancer? Memory wipes don't work on his kind.
Phantom Limb: True. But they take to hypnotic suggestion like cancer to a prostate.
Brock: The Freeze Team! Down on the floor and hold your breath!
Dean: There's pee-pee on the floor!
Brock: I told you to hold your breath!
Dr. Orpheus: If I reach behind your ear, it will not be a nickel I pull out, but your very soul!!!
Dr. Venture: Goodnight, ladies and gentlemen, you've been a great crowd...
Tiny Attorney: Dr. Orpheus, could you tell the court what you... do? You're a type of... magician?
Dr. Venture: Oh, they have no idea what they're in for...
Dr. Orpheus: Hug me!
Monarch: Fine. Whatever gets you off, man. Just don't go for the reach-around – because the Monarch doesn't swing that way.
Dr. Orpheus: Sleep!!!
Brock: The Guild works clean, professional. It's surgical with them. In a way, they're the only organization I still respect.
Hank: And they kill clean. Don't let dames get in the way.
Brock: Honestly, Hank, where do you pick that stuff up? I never see you read.
Dean: It's weird, right?
Brock: It's like he channels dead crazy people!
Hank: You... think it's a cry for help?
Dr. Orpheus: Do not be too hasty entering (the bathroom)! I had Taco Bell for lunch!!!
Dean: Saliva's nature's glue.
Hank: And raisins are nature's candy!
Brock: Who do you think supplied the department with new cruisers last year?
Dr. Venture: My tax dollars, for one.
Hank: Santa Claus, for two!
Dr. Venture: If I knew you could just call the cops on him, I would've done it years ago! Because I'm no sissy, no sir, I would just pick up that phone and, "Officer? There's a man in a butterfly suit shooting my robot with a laser beam."
Judge: You're on thin ice here. But do you get off the ice? Hell no, you jump up and down like a lunatic having a... a conniption fit.
Monarch: Well, Hank...what's it like to be a... liar?!? Huh? You like being a liar, with pants constantly on fire?!
Tiny Attorney: Objection, your Honor! Leadin'.
Monarch: I'll rephrase that. Hank, are you a liar?
Hank: No sir, I don't think so.
Monarch: Yes you are!
Dean: You're the liar!
Monarch: And may I remind you that I am rubber and you are glue and whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you!
Hank: Now be careful. These things have booby traps... 'Booby'. *snickers*
Doctor Girlfriend: You should have replaced his blood with acid after this part. The sharks won't touch him.
Monarch: Thanks, Doctor Girlfriend – now you tell me. Lower the giant hairdryer!
The end credits are in Dr. Orpheus' trademarked Hypno-Mind-Probe-Vision.
Fun Fact: Doctor Girlfriend worked for The Phantom Limb before joining The Monarch.
Over half the people who work on the show are caricatured as members of the jury and the court, such as Christopher McCulloch A.K.A. Jackson Publick and Doc Hammer.
The Monarch: Who designed it for you, Frank Frazetta?
The Monarch's comment on Dr. Girlfriend's revealing costume is a reference to artist Frank Frazetta. Among other things Frazetta became known for drawing somewhat suggestive female forms for men's magazines and later for sci-fi book covers.
Dean: Sanskrit reading
The pre-title sequence seems to follow the same poor English grammatic scheme as the old SEGA Genesis game Zero Wing, which gave us the phrase "All your base are belong to us."
Brock: Something big is going down, this place is crawling with Strangers.
Brock calls the agents for the Guild of Malicious Intent the "Strangers." The Strangers are a reference to the Strangers from the movie Dark City who also dress in long, dark coats and put people to sleep in order to alter their memories.
Monarch: Why, here's one of me at Danceateria, making out with Stiv Bators and Lydia Lunch.
Stiv Bators (Dead Boys) and Lydia Lunch (Teenage Jesus and the Jerks) are musicians from the early New York punk scene, and Danceateria is a club in Greenwich Village. Aside from Bators, Lydia Lunch was romantically involved with Venture Brothers composer Jim Thirlwell.
Monarch: And here's one of you skinny-dipping with Jim Foetus.
Jim Thirwell, who composes the music for The Venture Brothers, releases records as Foetus.
Dr. Orpheus swears on the Necronomicon Ex Mortis from the Evil Dead series rather then the Bible.
Monarch: Let's go, Fonzie...
And further referencing Arthur 'Fonzie' Fonzarelli from the series Happy Days.
The Monarch: Listen, Officer Poncharello...
Referencing Erik Estrada's most famous role - Francis Llewellyn 'Ponch' Poncherello from the TV series CHiPs.
In the beginning of the episode, Hank is wearing the outfit (fedora, jacket, 5 o'clock shadow) Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford) wore in the Indiana Jones Trilogy.
The Character of Tiny Attorney is a reference to the mutant character Kuato in Total Recall (1990)
Dean's appearance in the opening flashback (bushy mustache, Detroit Tigers ballcap, and Hawaiian shirt) is clearly patterned after Tom Selleck's character, Tom Magnum, from the Magnum, P.I. television series.
In the intro Brock is dressed up like Michael Knight from another hit 80's TV series Knight Rider
The Monarch: I can see your dirty pillows...
In the 1976 movie Carrie based on the Stephen King novel the main character Carrie is wearing her prom dress. When her mother sees the dress she responds by saying "I can see your dirty pillows. Everyone will."
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