The Worst Witch

Season 3 Episode 13

The Unfairground

Aired Unknown Jan 25, 2001 on ITV

Episode Recap

The third years are writing their last exam and Mildred is drawing a picture of Miss Hardbroom (an unflattering one) while she waits for the exam to end. It does, and they all sing, and dance and throw magical confetti. "Last one, last one, last one!" -- to the tune of "three two, three two, three two!" as sung by Baz and Gaz in the first season.

Miss Drill thinks it's fun and they magic her some daisies. Miss Hardbroom shows up and tells them all off. Mildred and co. go back to DOBS where Fenella and Griselda are playing chess. They complain that it's not fair to keep them at school when all their exams are done. Fenny and Gris tell them that there's a fair in town, and they'll make sure no one notices if they skip off (only there's a British term for it that made me blink).

They get dressed in normal clothes (they look so much better in normal person clothes) and go wandering off.

HB and Drill argue about whether the display in the corridor (with the confetti and wot not) was all in good fun and so on and so on. Miss Cackle doesn't listen to them, because she's busy running around grabbing her papers and coat (up and down the hall, up and down the stairs) because she's late for her spells class already. Eventually Drill and HB just throw their hands up and huff away.

Miss Crotchet's doing roll call. Mildred, Maud, and Jadu's voices answer when she calls their names. Fenny and Gris are standing at the back doing magical impressions, until Miss Hardbroom catches them.

Miss Crotchet keeps reading tarot cards in all her time off. HB keeps questioning Fenella and Griselda about where the third years are, but, despite all the disgusting cleaning things she has them doing, they don't answer.

HB looks out the window of the staff room and makes a cryptic speech about how although the little birds have flown away, there's a nasty surprise waiting in their cage.

They all come back from the fair with balloons and fish and teddy bears and so on. They're laughing and having a good time. They sit down in DOBS and Mildred talks about winning her fish, and asks Jadu what she's going to call her bear. Jadu says Cackle because she's big and round (and something else about her eyes). The camera swings around and we can just make out Miss Cackle sitting in the shadows behind Mildred as she starts to talk about how Miss Cackle always thinks she knows everything, but she doesn't have a...

"A clue," Miss Cackle says.

Meanwhile, in the staff room, Miss Crotchet's playing with her tarot cards, and, reminding us of us, she explains, "I may have only been here for a year," but she knows how things work. "Miss Hardbroom will argue for a crackdown, Miss Drill will make an appeal on the student's behalf, I'll say something sensible... which will be ignored. Miss Cackle will give a long (boring?) speech and everything will go on as normal."

"Never in all my years!" Miss Cackle comes storming through the door, slams it, flops down in her chair. She says something about looking at her eyes. "They are the eyes of someone who has been too kind." She tells Miss Hardbroom (much to her delight) that she's been right all along. There's going to be a crackdown. Uniforms at all times, etc...

HB gives the students the list of new regulations, and tells them that there are about a million new study periods too. There's zero tolerance, even if you weren't one of the students involved.

Miss Drill, who's on the student's sides, helps the third years hold a meeting to discuss it. Ethel thinks they're all bonkers for wanting to change the way things are done. "We're here to learn from people who are more knowledgeable than us. We can't run everything." Jadu, meanwhile, calls everyone to arms, and says that they need to have a voice. Even Drusilla gets involved and says that she wants more chips at lunch, and she doesn't want to be forced outside when it's cold.

Then Jadu calls a meeting in the dungeon that night. (The clubs are all dissolved).

After everyone's gone, Ethel tells Drusilla that she's either with her or them, and she'd better decide pretty fast.

At the meeting, Jadu says that they're part of an underground now, and that they should start a paper to make the other students think and realize what's going on. They all agree. Drusilla shows up and says that Ethel'd better look out if she tells on them. "She's a Hallow. She'll always be like that." They decide to call their paper Unfairground. "Word play all around."

They start working on it, and run an article calling a meeting in the great hall. No one will be able to hear, because there'll be a ring of silence around it. "It's almost finished now." Fenella and Griselda (still being made to clean everything in the school) are mixing a potion in with the water they're using to create the ring.

Crotchet predicts revolt and revolution in the future (with her tarot cards) and tells Miss Hardbroom not to walk under ladders (Fenella and Griselda are up on ladders). HB makes fun of her and walks under the ladder. When she says that she's going looking for Mildred, Fenella "accidentally" drops the water bucket on her.

Ruby rigs up a printing press (magic powered) and they start distributing their paper, with Mildred's drawing on the cover. Ethel spies on them and finds out. After class, HB reminds everyone about "the chop" for anyone causing trouble. Ethel tells Drusilla that they have to go to HB or she'll think they're in on it. "We have our futures to think about."

"The only future you have to think about is tonight, and what will happen to you if you tell Hardbroom," Drusilla says. She leaves Ethel alone in the room, and HB appears.

"Let's talk about the future," she says - another one of those sinister parts with the person standing in the shadows behind you - "Miss Crotchet's predicting revolution. What do you think will happen this afternoon?"

Meanwhile, Jadu and Mildred lead the rally in the great hall. Everyone votes that they don't want to wear their uniforms outside of school, that they want the secret societies reinstated, and that they want more chips.

Then, as promised, they run an optical illusion spell that makes it like being on a roller coaster.

Meanwhile, Ethel and the staff are outside the door. They don't hear anything, but Ethel tells them she's sure they're in there. HB tries to go in the door, but appears outside it again. HB and Cackle try together but the same thing happens. It's a revolving door spell.

They magic themselves in, and end up on the roller coaster with the girls.

"They've certainly taken us for a ride," says Cackle once she has Mildred, Ruby, Jadu, Maud, Drusilla, and Enid in her office. She's none too pleased, and nasty things get said. Everyone is allowed to leave except Mildred and Jadu. "Miss Hardbroom wants you expelled... I'm asking your parents to voluntarily withdraw you." Jadu asks if they can try to explain but they're not allowed to.

"We have seen and read enough," says Miss Hardbroom. "You knew this was coming. You were warned."