Third Watch Season 1 Episode 16

(Bosco and Faith are following the guys that he robbed)
Faith (sighs): This is great. "Officer Yokas, tell the grand jury what you did when you found out your partner commited armed robbery?" ... "Well, first I assisted him in getting rid of the evidence, and then... "
Bosco: These guys are dangerous, Yokas. They're gonna screw up and when they do, we're gonna be there to bust 'em for it.
Faith: You know, I wouldn't count on those two being on the first bus to Attica. (they see the guys take a couple of magazines, and a lady chases them with a broom and hits them, they give them back) Oh, yeah, a regular Bonnie and Clyde. (laughs) I can definatly see why you had to pull a gun on those two. (the guys go into a strip club) Oh, you know what? That's it. I'm not sitting here for an hour while those guys get their rocks off sticking dollar bills into pasties. ... I'm hungry.
Bosco: You have to help me.
Faith: Food!
Bosco: You have to--
Faith: Now!

(See a sketch of Bosco, made by the robbers)
Faith (reading the wanted poster): "Wanted for armed robbery. Suspect is 5'10..." (Bosco grabs the paper from her, Faith laughs) Bosco, you got nothin' to worry about.
Bosco (continues reading): "... About 165 pounds, short brown hair, wearing jeans and a black jacket, driving a 70's mustang. Considered armed and extermely dangerous."
Faith: Oh, they forgot "And stupid."
Bosco: That looks like nothing me.
Faith: Sure, it does.
Bosco: That's not my nose, and my face is wider than that.

(After Bosco throws out the clothes from the guys he's robbed)
Bosco: There's nothin' to tie me to this now, except the word of two skel's. It's called plausiable deniablitly.
Faith: Alright, listen to me.
Bosco: Huh?
Faith: All you gotta do is keep a low profile and stop yourself from runnin' off at the mouth. (to herself) That oughta be easy.

Bosco: Yokas, they were tryin' to rob me for god's sakes.
Faith: Oh, yeah, but some how they ended up with no clothes and no money.

Robber: It's kind of cold, huh?
Bosco: Yeah, when you get ice that usually means it's cold outside.
Robber: What kind of scraper you using?
Bosco: A plastic one.

Bosco: You know, Yokas, some things are better than sex.
Yokas: You got a fever or something?
Bosco: I'm serious. I'm capable of getting a rush out of other things in life, you know.
Yokas: Like what, sucking on whipped cream cans?

Bosco: I made a really big mistake.
Yokas: What'd you forget to untie Nicole this morning?

Bosco: Faith, I screwed up. Real bad.
Faith: Oh, don't tell me. You slept with the Captain's daughter? (laughs) Oh, whoops, you already did that. (laughs)
Bosco: I robbed those two guys.
Faith: What?
Bosco: I knew you'd freak out.
Faith: You robbed somebody?
Bosco: Those two guys tried to rob me, next thing I know, I pulled out my gun and... If I was an average joe, I'd be begging for mercy, right?
Faith: Your gun? Bosco. That is armed robbery. (toliet flushes and Sully comes out)
Bosco: I thought you checked the stalls.
Faith: I didn't know you were gonna confess to armed robbery.
Davis (walks in): Armed robbery? (Bosco glares at Faith, Faith cringes)

{after Carlos stands up Vangie}
Carlos: It wasn't a date.
Doc: I'm sure she absolutely sees it that way. You got any pets, you better not leave them out at night.

"Nickel"/"Puff Daddy": You got some kind of problem with me?
Doc: No, no. By all means, get shot as much as you like.

Kim: Hey, how's it goin' with Treeva?
Bobby: Treva.
Kim: What kind of name is that?
Bobby: What? It's worse than Kim?
Kim: What's wrong with Kim?
Bobby: It's just Kim. It doesn't mean anything.
Kim: Yes, it does. It's like a... saint or something.
Bobby: Saint Kimberly? In what religion?

Bosco (referring to the guys he robbed): What are they doin'?
Faith: They're lookin' at the mug books.
Bosco: Oh, god. I'm screwed. I am so screwed. I swear to god if I make it outta this, I'm gonna get like a...
Sully: Lobotomy?
Davis: Are those the guys?
Faith: Yeah, they're lookin' at the mug books.
Bosco: I gotta get rid of their clothes.
Davis: Their clothes?
Faith: Don't ask. Hey, do it on your own time, Bos. I'm done. (turns to walk away, Bosco grabs her)
Bosco: Come here. No, you gotta help me, you're my partner.
Davis: Hey, wouldn't that be like hindering proscecution or somethin'?
Sully: At least.
Bosco: Hey, don't listen to them. I swear to god, Faith, I'll change. I swear I'll change. I'll get help, I really will.
Faith: Therapy. Licensed, able-to-prescribe-medication type therapy.
Bosco: What, like laying on some couch talking about how my mother didn't potty train me right? (Davis and Sully laugh) Fine.

Bosco: You got the smallest bladder of any woman I know.
Yokas: Oh, who are you kidding? If you had to sit down to pee we'd be in there half our shift.

Davis: So you think Bosco's gonna get caught?
Sully: I sure as hell hope not. One cop screws up, it just makes life miserable for the rest of us.
Davis: He should've just arrested those guys. I still can't believe he robbed them, it's ridiculous.
Sully: Of course you can't. If somebody tried to rob you, you'd invite 'em home for dinner, ask them what went wrong in their family life that could lead them to this horrible place.
Davis: So, what's gonna happen if he gets caught?
Sully: They're not gonna make him cop of the year, that's for sure.

Kim: Hey, we gotta talk.
Jimmy: Why is it whenever I'm having a crappy day, you appear and say "we gotta talk"?

{to Nathaniel a.k.a. Puppet}
Doc: How long you think it's gonna be before we shove you into a body bag?

Kim: Where's Bosco?
Faith: He headed off to the toliet with the newspaper, so I don't know when we'll see him again.
Kim: Why do guys do that? Read on the toilet?
Faith (laughs): I don't think he actually reads the articles. I think he just looks at the pictures.

Kim: Joey pushed a kid off the jungle gym today. Broke his arm.
Faith: Ouch. ... You don't think that that's your fault, do 'ya?
Kim: Well, obviously I'm screwin' up some where.
Faith: Kim, I look at my kids everyday, I wonder if I'm raising a couple of serial killers.
Kim: Well, at least you got a husband. I need somebody to help me out.
Faith: Yeah, I mean, but what are you gonna do? Husbands don't just fall outta trees.
Kim: Maybe, I'm being too picky, I mean, what am I holding out for? True love? It's selfish. I can't keep doing this alone anymore, it's hurting Joey.
Faith: Kim, what are you gonna do? You're gonna marry some guy just so Joey has a father? There's lots worse things you can do.
Bosco (walks up behind them): Gab, gab, gab, gab, gab. It never stops, does it?

{about Nathaniel after his little brother dies}
Doc: I don't care if his ass bleeds to death, he's not getting in my rig.