Charlie: I can see you.
Alan: And I can see you, too.
Charlie: No, I mean, Berta never cleaned while I was in the room. She was like, invisible.
Alan: I'm sorry. I'll try to be more transparent.
(Alan finishes criticizing Berta's housekeeping habits)
Berta: I hope you two will be very happy together
Charlie: Who's gonna take care of me? Who's going to do the laundry and the shopping and the cleaning and all the other stuff?
Berta: Ask the scrubbing bubble there.
Jake: Uncle Charlie, why is Berta leaving?
Charlie: Why? It doesn't matter, Jake. What matters is she's gone... and we're all going to die.
Jake: These clothes look stupid.
Charlie: You're ten. No one cares.
Alan: You're acting like a child.
Charlie: I am not! (He starts to go upstairs)
Alan; Where are you going?!
Charlie: If I can't write my chocolate song, I'm going to take a nap!
Alan: You just kicked me in your sleep!
Charlie: Who said I was sleeping?
Charlie: Rose, no 'goodbyes.' Just turn around... and walk away.
(After Jake leaves with his mother,and is dressed really nicely)
Alan: I thought you said he won.
Charlie: He did. Now he's just screwing with me.
Charlie: Your hair is still greasy. Did you wash it?
Jake: You told me to take a shower; you didn't tell me to wash my hair.
Charlie: Well go wash your hair.
(Jake goes into the bathroom)
Rose: You didn't tell him to rinse.
Charlie: Good idea, good idea. Jake! RINSE!
The German episode title is "Ich brauche Berta", meaning "I Need Berta". The French title is "Un ménage à trois". The Italian episode title is "Berta". The Spanish title is "Si no puedo componer mi canción del chocolate me voy a echar una siesta", an exact translation.
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