Alan says the title Just Once With Aunt Sophie of this episode.
Charlie: Ha, one kiss and he's ready to marry the girl.
Charlie: So you don't have to worry, he's definitely your son.
Alan: What's going on in school?
Alan: "Nothin'?" You just sit there all day and stare at the wall?
Jake: That's where the clock is.
Alan: Wendy Cho's the smartest girl at school. I wonder why she's calling Jake?
Charlie: Maybe she lost a bet.
Alan: Charlie, that's not nice.
Charlie: Well, kids are cruel.
Jake: Can I get leather pants?
Charlie and Alan: No!
Jake: Why not?
Charlie: 'Cause you need something that lets the farts out.
Alan: I happen to believe that childhood should be a time of innocence.
Charlie: I agree: childhood should be a time of innocence, and Bambi's mother shouldn't die, and lap dances should be complementary after the fifth cocktail, but that's not the world we live in.
Charlie: By the way, did you have the talk with him?
Alan: Well sure, I mean, well we've had a talk, you know, covered the basics. He knows where babies come from and how they got there.
Charlie: That's all? He's going to this party completely clueless about how much fun he can have between "Hi, how are you" and "What do you mean you missed your period."
Charlie: I can't risk letting you scar the kid forever.
Alan: What do you mean by that?
Charlie: Face it, Alan, what can you bring to the table other than a lifetime of abject failure with women?
Alan: It's not a lifetime yet.
Charlie: I, on the other hand, have a wealth of experience to offer.
Alan: He's twelve, he doesn't need know how to choreograph a three-way.
Charlie: I'm not talking about that—I'm saving that for prom night.
Charlie: Why does everyone keep telling me to shut up?
Alan: Because you're an insensitive dolt.
Charlie: That's no reason.
(Jake is asking to go to a girls party)
Alan: Are her parents going to be there?
Jake: I guess.
Charlie: Let the fathers who have girls worry about that.
Charlie: You know what they say, a man's reach must exceed his grasp, but what's a penis for?
Alan: Who says that?
Charlie: Okay, I might be paraphrasing.
The German episode title is "Ein Mann braucht höhere Ziele", meaning "Man Needs a Higher Purpose". The French title is "Ma première boum", meaning "My First Party". The Italian title is "Un discepolo per Charlie", meaning "A Disciple for Charlie". The Spanish title is "Solo una vez con tía Sofia", an exact translation.
Charlie, thinking back to their high school days, calls his brother "dungeon master Alan." This is in reference to the role playing game Dungeons and Dragons, whose participants are stereotypically the socially unpopular. The dungeon master is the person who runs the game for the other players.
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