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Two Guys and a Girl

Season 1 Episode 12

Two Guys, a Girl and a Dad

Aired Tuesday 9:30 PM Jul 15, 1998 on ABC
out of 10
User Rating
324 votes

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Episode Summary

Two Guys, a Girl and a Dad
Pete is trusted to keep the fact that Berg's dad has quit his law firm to become a caricaturist in the park from Berg and that Berg is no longer in law school from Berg's father. Pete is highly irritated by all this and so tries to get the two to talk to each other.

Sharon continues to hate her job.moreless

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    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (1)

    • QUOTES (14)

      • Pete: What does this mean for me? After thirty years of being an architect, I'm gonna melt down and become a juggler?
        Berg: No, of course not. I see you guessing people's weight.

      • Pete: That's your dad.
        Berg: What? How do you know?
        Pete: I told him to stop by here before dinner.
        Berg: I don't know what you're up to, but one word out of you and I'm inviting Mr. Bauer over to watch Silence of the Lambs and inviting him over to dinner!

      • Mr. Bergen: (About Mr. Bauer) Is he alright?
        Pete: Not even remotely.

      • Sharon: What? Your dad still thinks you're in law school?
        Berg: Well, your dad still thinks you're a virgin.

      • Pete: Come on, Berg, tell your dad the truth.
        Berg: We don't tell the truth in our family, my dad's a lawyer.

      • Pete: I invite Mr. Bergen over to the apartment, I tell them they both have something they need to say to each other; "Dad, I'm not in law school." "Mike, I play with crayons in the park." Everyone hugs. It will be a real 'Oprah' moment.

      • Mr. Bergen: What's going on?
        Mr. Bauer: My shorts are bunching up on me.

      • Sharon: Pete, just because it works for your family it doesn't mean it works for everyone. It's like this (grabs a bottle with a red chemical liquid) You pour it down your zink, it un-clogs your drain. You pour it in a pond, you get fish with feet.

      • Mr. Bergen: I'm disappointed in you Pete.
        Pete: What! What did I do?
        Mr. Bergen: I told you to lie! Can't I trust you?
        Berg: (to his father) I told him to lie to you too. (to Pete) What is the matter with you?

      • Sharon: Berg, you can have my stereo. Pete, you can have my dresser.
        Pete: Oh, I don't want your dresser...why does he get the stereo?

      • Mr. Bergen: I know this seems strange, but you spend thirty years arguing in court. Every day the clients are staring at you, their lives in your hands, and you start doodling.

      • Berg: Meanwile, how does mom feel about all of this?
        Mr. Bergen: Well, your mother is a trooper.
        Berg: You haven't told her.
        Mr. Bergen: Did you tell her about law school?
        Berg: What, are you crazy?
        Mr. Bergen: No reason to upset her.
        Berg: Deal.

      • Berg: (to dad) I was the only kid in school who had a "12 Angry Men" lunchbox.

      • Pete: Think about what I said -- and not about how stupid I look in this hat.

    • NOTES (1)

    • ALLUSIONS (1)

      • Mr. Bauer: Today is my son's birthday and I missed his party, I was busy in court. At least that's what I tell the little guy. So my son made a wish; for 24 hours I cannot tell a lie.

        This is an allusion to the film Liar Liar from 1997, starring Jim Carrey.