Will & Grace

Season 5 Episode 23

23 (2)

Aired Thursday 9:00 PM May 08, 2003 on NBC



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Lorraine: (about Stan dying while having sex) His last words were "I'm... I'm... I'm...!" And then he was gone.

    • Rosario: (after learning she has to work for Karen 20 more years before getting $10 millon) Do you need anything, Miss Karen? Can I get you a soda?
      Karen: I'll think about that in 2016.

    • (reading Stan's will after Karen got everything)
      Will: And finally, to Lorraine Finster..
      Lorraine: What the hell's left? His right testis on a biscuit?

    • Karen: (after Lorraine walks in) Well, well, well. Look what my husband's cash dragged in.

    • Jack: (to Karen at Stan's funeral) I'm gonna go and make sure all the unattractive people are in the back. You shouldn't have to bear anymore pain today.

    • Grace: The point is the randomness of it all. People die. I might die. Even worse, I might get old. Really old.
      Leo: And we're back to Grace.
      Will: I don't think we really ever left.

    • Karen: Most of you know about the recent troubles Stan and I have had. Just in case you don't, I'll get you up to speed, the British whore killed him. But the truth is we really did care about each other. I guess what I'm trying to say is… I want you all to leave so I can find out what's in his will... I'm not kidding. If you're not in the will, please exit. The good people of Neutrogena have provided wonderful gift-bags. Please pick one up on your way out!

    • Jack: (About Lorraine) We hate her. We hate her more than the know-it-all daughter in the Gilmore Girls.

    • Leo: Baby, I want you to come. This--this is what I do. And--and you're... you're who I do. I-I just wanna be able to do who I do, while I do what I do.
      Grace: You do?
      Leo: I do.
      Grace: Whoo-hoo! Guatemala! I'm going to Spain!

    • Leo: Doctors Without Borders. They're opening a new clinic in Guatemala and they--they want me to come help set it up.
      Grace: Guatemala? You're going back to Africa?

    • Lorraine: Stanley Walker was a giant bear of a man. And underneath that giant bear was a smaller bear. And underneath that bear was me. Gasping for air. When I first met Stanley, I was working in the cafeteria of a white collar prison. At the time, I was deeply involved with the handsome embezzler who led a major telecom company into bankruptcy. When I laid eyes on Stanley, all thoughts of other criminals were forgotten.

    • Lorraine: (Whispering to Karen) Pssst. I'd like you to have all your things out by tomorrow morning, all right?
      Karen: (Whispering to Lorraine) Oh, okay. Oh, pssst. I'd like you to eat me.

    • Lorraine: You're a natty dresser. Are you English?
      Will: Oh, no, I'm gay.
      Lorraine: Well, it's the same thing.
      Will: If that weren't true, I'd find it offensive.

    • Rosario: Miss Karen. I have awful news.
      Karen: (angrily) What is it, Rosie? Because this day couldn't possibly get any worse.
      Rosario: It's Mr. Stan. He's dead.
      (Everyone is stunned. Karen sits down on the couch. Leo bangs open the door. He's wearing scrubs and carrying two six-packs of beer.)
      Leo: Hey, hey, I got off work early. Picked up a couple of sixes. I found a 20 on the street. Damn, it's good to be alive! (Everyone remains silent) What?

    • Grace: (sighs) That was endless. Do you remember when it used to take six minutes to cook macaroni and cheese?
      Jack: No… I'm really young.

    • Jack: You're so generous. I swear, if you weren't Jewish, you'd definitely go to heaven.
      Grace: Thanks, Jack. And if you weren't gay, you'd go there too.

    • Karen: Nice outfit for a funeral. If that dress were any shorter, I could see your English muffin.
      Lorraine: I wouldn't talk. If that dress were any lower, I could see your Yankee Doodles.

    • (At Stanley's funeral)
      Will: Stanley Walker was a great man.
      Grace: A big man.
      Jack: A FAT man.
      Will: But he was also a kind man.
      Grace: A family man.
      Jack: A surprisingly good dancer.

    • (Reading Stanley's will)
      Will: 'First and foremost, for her years of undying love and loyalty, I leave to my dear, dear maid, Rosario, the sum of $10 million dollars...'
      (Everyone gasps)
      Rosario: (Jumping up) I'm free! I'm free from that evil witch. (to Karen) I hope you rot, and I hope it hurts.
      Will: '...to be paid upon the completion of 20 more years of service to Karen Walker.'

    • (Karen and Will enter)
      Karen: Who does that Stanley Walker think he is? Trying to cheat me outta half of his fortune? I gave that man the drunkest years of my life!
      Will: Oh, you've still got some good drunk years ahead of you, I bet.
      Karen: (To Jack and Grace) Oh, and you two wouldn't believe the lawyer that Stan has. Hmm, this Truman fella. Tricky little queen. Mincing around the conference room, (with a limp wrist) 'I object, move to the strike.'
      Will: Yeah, he was a riot. You know who else was something? The pill-popping shrew trying to get her hands on Stan's money. Yeah. Falling asleep on the conference table, waking up with a shriek, throwing up a little in her purse.

    • Grace: Look, Will. We've been cooking.
      (Grace holds up the bowl of Macaroni and Cheese)
      Will: Oh, a cuisine of Chef Boy-are-you-lazy.
      Grace: Hey, we were just trying to do something nice. Sorry, if it wasn't as fancy as you would've done it. With your squeezing pepper, and your stirring things in bowls.
      Will: Sorry, it's just been a difficult day... watching Joan Crawford address PepsiCo.
      Karen: Oh, yeah, real rough day for you. Meanwhile, my soon-to-be ex-husband is trying to screw me over. I gave that man the drunkest years of my life!
      Will: Stop saying that here, stop saying that to the judge!

  • Notes

    • In December 2005, cable network TV Land named Karen's "Eat Me" proclamation to Lorraine as Number 90 on its 100 Most Unexpected TV Moments list.

    • Upon its original airing, this was a 40-minute "super size" episode that began at 9:18 p.m. E.S.T. Some scenes are cut in the syndicated version of the episode.

  • Allusions

    • Will: Sorry, it's just been a difficult day... watching Joan Crawford address PepsiCo.

      Will is referring to the famous scene in the 1981 movie Mommie Dearest where actress Joan Crawford plays hardball with the board of PepsiCo when they try to make her step down.

    • Jack: We hate her. We hate her even more than the know-it-all daughter on the Gilmore Girls.

      Jack is talking about the Rory Gilmore character on the show Gilmore Girls, played by Alexis Bledel.

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